Elysian
by miikasaa
Summary: Collection of works showing Eren and Mikasa's relationship in canon, post-canon, and modern settings. 15. Royale- Five years ago, Eren Jaeger joined the police force to apprehend the Ackermans. But as the incompetence of his department becomes clear, and his affair with Mikasa Ackerman stretches on, Eren must make a decision: stay or accept Mikasa's proposition. [Assassin AU]
1. Remembering You

**Remembering You**

Eren knew everything of their past life but she remembered nothing. He was waiting for the day when he would find her again, when she remembered how much she meant to him.

* * *

><p>"Eren, I'm telling you, you can't waste your paycheck on marshmallows and water guns."<p>

"Why not?" Eren grumbled, but dropped the bags of marshmallows back onto the shelves. He eyed the water guns across the aisles, but made no move towards them. He really wanted to shoot Armin with the marshmallows while he slept.

Armin rolled his eyes, tugging his best friend away from the candy. "You have to save up for college. Classes start in a few weeks."

"I know that," Eren said, tossing a few packages of Ramen into the cart. "But thirty bucks on candy and toy guns is definitely not a waste."

"Yes it is." A cool, bored voice answered him. Eren stifled a groan.

Armin's face lit up as Annie paused next to the two boys, her bangs falling messily into her eyes. Eren could see Reiner and Bertholdt in the cereal aisle, filling a basket with several different brands.

"You only say that because you're no fun."

Annie shot him a look that once stopped his blood cold, taking a step towards him but halting at Armin's hand on her shoulder. Eren didn't hate Annie, not in the slightest, he hated that she remembered, that she'd found Armin again, and that the one person Eren wanted didn't know him at all.

Armin leaned down to plant a small kiss to Annie's cheek, laughing when she tried to push him away. "Are you coming to movie night tonight?"

"Yeah," Annie rolled her eyes. "Sasha wouldn't stop bothering me about it until I agreed. Said something about making up for lost time."

The blonde nodded understandingly. "She was the most recent to remember. Sasha's probably desperate to get us all together again, in a situation where we're not in immanent danger."

The three of them were silent for a moment, each reflecting on Armin's words. Their past lives felt like nothing more than confusing memories, or extremely vivid dreams, but they knew them well. The monsters called Titans, the fighting, their superiors and friends in the military, the death and all the blood… so much blood…

Her torso soaked in the same blood red that had adorned her neck for so long…

Eren shook his head, trying to focus back in on the conversation between the blonde couple.

Annie hooked a thumb over her shoulder. "Reiner and Bertl will be there too. Reiner got Marco to convince Jean, and you know Connie's game with anything. Sasha's rooming in the city with Ymir and Historia, so we'll all be there."

Eren stiffened, glaring at the floor. They wouldn't all be there. And the fucking movie night would be as empty as the rest of his life had felt since remembering his past. He'd known Armin since they were kids, and something had always felt off, but since learning of his past life and what she'd endured, the emptiness had hurt so much more.

It was why he wore the damn scarf every day, regardless of the weather.

Annie eyed him warily. "Sorry."

"Whatever." Eren pushed past her, grabbing a bag of chips from a stand as he stalked off. He heard Armin apologize, and promise to see her that night at Sasha's, before hurrying to meet Eren at the register.

"Eren," his tone laced with warning.

The brunette sighed. "I know. Sorry."

"You'll find her again." Armin began loading the food from the cart onto the conveyor belt. The cashier looked bored, popping gum and scanning the food with barely any thought, reading Armin his total in her light tone.

"What if I don't?" Armin shot him a look, but he ducked his head, grabbing a few of the bags. "I'm serious, Armin. What if the situation is so different now that she's living in Japan with her parents or something? What if seeing me again isn't what's meant to happen? Oh god, Armin, she'll remember _everything_."

"She might remember already." Armin murmured; shifting the bags he held into his other hand. Their apartment was only a few blocks away from the small marketplace. They paused the conversation to wait for the little Walkman across the street to turn green, focusing instead on not being hit by a biker as they crossed. "Would it really be so bad if she did?" Armin continued once they reached the sidewalk. "We remember everything. Annie, Bertholdt, and Reiner do. Everyone does. We all know what happened, and she was always the strongest, do you really think it would break her?"

"Yes." Eren said softly. "Armin, she thought I was dead as she died. I don't even know if I managed to convince her I was alive. She was exhausted, missing limbs… bleeding everywhere…"

Armin placed a hand on his shoulder. "Stop, Eren. Thinking about it's only going to make you feel worse."

"I know."

Armin sighed, but didn't say anything else as they walked, weaving through people to get to their apartment. They still had a few hours until they had to get to Sasha's, and Eren just wanted to lock himself in his room until then, where he could wish her past life had ended differently, where he could wish he could've saved her.

A particularly loud shout from a bicyclist prompted Eren to look up, ready to shout back at the biker and probably cause a scene, but something stopped him. He paused at the sight, almost squinting to make sure he was really seeing it.

On a bench about half a block away, a young girl sat alone, her legs crossed and her head held up on her knuckles as she scrolled through her phone. Her shoulder-length black hair formed a curtain, hiding her face from him, but Eren didn't need anymore proof. The tan jacket that looked like their old military uniforms, the air of being unapproachable, it was all so familiar he swore his soul ached.

Eren didn't know how he was supposed to feel. Armin was never able to express how he'd felt when he found Annie again, Ymir was no help about when she found Christa, Sasha just said it felt like how eating did once she recognized Connie. When Eren remembered his past life, he'd been crushed, unable to leave the house for days, but now… now he felt like his life was coming back together, as if every missing piece was finding its place. Eren breathed easier despite the feeling that his lungs were about to explode.

She was there. She was there, sitting on the bench, alive and free of wounds and Eren hadn't been this happy since remembering her six years ago.

_Mikasa…_

"Eren!" He ignored Armin's shout- there was no way the blonde hadn't seen her- running toward her.

He needed a plan. He couldn't just run up to her and ask if she remembered him, the boy she confessed to in a battlefield, the monster turned human she had fallen in love with, the boy who promised to always protect her and then failed to do so at the most crucial moment… the boy who wasn't able to save her from her brutal death.

Eren shook his head. Those things were in the past and he couldn't just bombard her with questions. There was no guarantee she remembered him, or her past life, or anything they had gone through.

It hit him then, with only a few seconds to spare. It was the worst plan and it was terribly cliché but it was all he had, so at the last second, he pretended to trip, tossing the bag with the least amount of breakable things in it, scatting the contents across the pavement.

He skid across the sidewalk a little, feeling pebbled embed themselves into his palms, but he didn't care; all that mattered was-

"Are you okay?"

Mikasa stood up quickly, gathering his things and placing them into the discarded plastic bag, dropping down to her knees in front of him, still holding onto the bag.

Eren's heart was beating like crazy. He felt whole again. He sat back onto his own knees and looked up, his breath catching at the sight of her. His memories had been fuzzy, never quite able to make a clear picture of the girl he'd so hopelessly fallen for. But now he knew that his memories would never have done her justice.

Her stormy grey eyes were laced with concern, her nose furrowed as she examined his face. Her skin was pale porcelain, probably just as soft as he remembered it being. How Eren lived so long without her was a mystery.

"- Should be more careful," Mikasa finished, holding out the bag to him.

"Huh?" Eren blinked, eyeing the bag and then the girl in front of him. He wanted to wrap her in his arms again.

Her thin eyebrows pulled towards her eyes as she frowned, letting go of the bag once he had a hand on it. "Why are you crying?"

A million memories flooded his mind at once as Eren reached up towards his eye, and sure enough there were tears dripping from it. Did that mean…?

Mikasa made no move to leave, or any move to indicate that she remembered the significance of that question. "Oh, uh, the fall hurt a lot, I guess."

"Oh." She tucked her phone into her jacket pocket, reaching up to her neck, faltering at the last second and brushing a hand through her hair.

"Do you do that a lot?" Eren asked suddenly, surprising her.

Mikasa blinked. "I suppose. It's a habit I've had since I was younger."

She didn't remember him.

Eren felt his heart sink. His only love didn't know who he was. Now he really did have an excuse for his tears.

Eren moved quickly, reaching up to his neck and whipping the scarf away from his skin. Mikasa eyed him warily.

"What are you-?"

Before she could continue, Eren threw the scarf around her own neck, wrapping it clumsily, and throwing the end against her face. Mikasa's eyes widened, reminding him of the broken girl he'd once wrapped in a similar fabric, but she didn't move away from him.

"Why-?"

Eren smiled sadly, standing up and offering her his hand. She took it without question. "You looked cold." He lied; it was summer, if anything the scarf would only suffocate her. He didn't let go of her hand.

Mikasa adjusted the scarf into a familiar knot, the ends dropping between the folds of her jacket. Her fingers threaded into the fabric slowly, as if they had done it a million times before.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome, Mikasa." Fuck.

He expected a harsh reaction. Hanji, his old chemistry teacher, once told him that forced memories and slip-ups could make someone angry, even volatile, but Mikasa only looked confused and a little frustrated. "How do you know…?"

"Hey, brat!" Eren dropped her hand, recognizing the voice as one he'd heard for years. He was still as short as Eren remembered, haircut in the same style as his past life, stupid cravat still in place at his neck. He didn't even notice Eren. "Let's go. My apartment is this way."

Mikasa nodded. "Okay, Levi." She looked up at Eren again, staring as if trying to make sense of something. He felt short of breath again, maybe… "Thank you again, uh," she trailed off.

"Eren."

Levi stiffened. Mikasa gave him a small smile, "Thank you, Eren." The two of them turned away, walking towards the next crosswalk. Levi paused for a second as they waited to cross the street that would take them further away from Eren. He turned to face the brunette, nodding once. Mikasa noticed, turning around as well, as Levi faced the street again, the same soft smile in place. "See you later, Eren." She called back to him before Levi tugged on her wrist to cross.

Eren didn't notice the company until Armin squeezed his shoulder. He wiped his eyes messily. His heart had broken again.

"Eren-"

"She didn't remember." Eren laughed bitterly. "How could she not remember?"

Armin didn't say anything for a moment. "Maybe there's no guarantee that someone will get those memories back. Did you-?"

"No. It wouldn't be right to try to force her to remember."

Armin took the bags from him, and they both sat on the bench Mikasa had previously occupied. Eren briefly wondered how bad it was for Armin, who'd lost his best friend that day, a best friend who didn't even know he existed.

"I'm sorry, Eren."

Eren slouched into the bench, staring at the uneven cracks in the sidewalk. "Me too." He murmured, his mind filled with images of his past life- nights spent intertwined, stories told when they couldn't sleep, her face the first time she told him she loved him, her face when he said it back, the calm look on her features when she died in the field, held tightly in his arms as he screamed and cried for her to wake up. He remembered it all and she didn't know any of it.

He stared at the street she'd crossed until night fell and Armin told him they needed to go.


	2. Cute

**Cute**

"You can't just kiss her when she's mad at you." "Why not?" Eren's face scrunched slightly in confusion. "She looked cute, and I really wanted to kiss her."

* * *

><p>Eren scribbled furiously across his paper, his head jerking between the textbook and papers splayed over the table while he solved the equations in front of him. His hand stilled as he checked an answer before thrusting it to his only companion at the small table.<p>

The blonde barely looked up as he dragged the paper towards him, eyes scanning the numbers and letters that Eren passed to him.

"Well?" The brunette asked impatiently, tapping his pencil against the edge of the table.

Armin smirked, a hardly noticeable quirk of his lips, before sliding the paper back towards Eren. "Ten through twenty-eight are all wrong."

Eren blanched. "That's half of them!"

His best friend flipped a page in his own textbook, small smirk turning into a full-blown smile. "You better get working, then."

"Why do I even need to do this to become a doctor?"

"You can't be serious."

Eren erased the incorrect problems on his paper, grumbling the entire time about calculus and higher mathematics and swearing for the millionth time that he was giving up on med school.

"Eren." The boy in question looked up, watching as Armin closed his book and stood from the table, fixing him with a blank stare. "Move the decimal point."

Eren quickly looked back at his paper and through the eraser shavings he could vaguely see that his answers all had decimals, and judging by the answers he quickly looked up in the back of his book, all of his answers were only off by a point or two. He could have saved all his work.

"Motherfucker!"

Armin laughed, rustling through a few cabinets and gathering ingredients. Eren didn't know what he was making, and he was too busy re-writing all of his work to ask.

He was still re-writing his answers when the door to the boy's apartment swung open and Mikasa walked in, carrying at least four manila folders in her arms while the bag slung over her shoulder looked dangerously close to falling off. Her lips were pursed in a pout as she dropped the papers onto the table, letting the bag fall from her shoulder to the ground.

Eren looked up, grinning. Seeing her was always one of his favorite parts of the day, even if she was pouting or grumbling, even if they said nothing to each other, and just enjoyed their time spent together. Anything with her was a highlight.

She was close enough that Eren could reach a hand out, slink it through her hair and around the nape of her neck, and pull her down for a quick kiss. "Hey," he whispered as they pulled away.

"Hey." She replied, dropping into the chair Armin had recently vacated and throwing him a small smile as he greeted her.

She propped her feet onto Eren's lap, and were it anyone else he would immediately throw them off, but hers could stay. Just her presence was enough to sufficiently distract him from the homework in front of him- his class wasn't until ten in the morning; he had time.

He ran his hand down her calf, tipping her shoes off and onto the floor, smiling at the little hum she let out. "How was work at the firm?" Eren asked, wrapping his fingers around her ankle. He chuckled at the grimace his question was rewarded with, and continued, "Levi still working you to the bone?"

Mikasa nodded and gestured vaguely to the stack of manila folders. "He gave me four extra cases. I have trials for all of these in three weeks on top of the ones I have already. He's terrible."

Eren stroked a path from her ankle to her knee, running his fingers lightly over the tights she wore. "I know you can do it, Mika. You're one of the best lawyers that place has got."

"Levi wouldn't give this work load to you if he didn't think you could handle it, Mikasa." Armin supplied, stirring away at a ceramic bowl that Eren hoped was filled with cookie dough.

"Or he wanted to kill me." Mikasa muttered, dropping her gaze to the stack of folders.

Eren laughed, squeezing her leg affectionately. "I highly doubt he's trying to kill you."

Mikasa made a noncommittal sound, throwing open Armin's abandoned textbook to a random page, but after only a few minutes, the dark haired girl pushed the book away, skirting her eyes around the apartment before meeting Eren's bright green eyes again.

"Eren."

"Hm?"

"Why's your dirty underwear on the floor?"

Eren's brows furrowed- he could have sworn he'd cleaned up all the clothes left on the floor after last night- and he turned in his seat to survey the room and yup, there was his underwear lying innocently on the rug.

"In my defense," he turned back around in his seat, boyish grin brightening his features. "It's you're fault they're there in the first place." Armin groaned, reminding them he was in the room and they shouldn't discuss what he'd been out of the apartment for the night before.

Mikasa, apparently, did not find his quip funny. She sighed, shuffling her feet from his lap and standing. She stalked into the living room, gingerly picking up his underwear, curling it into her hand. She disappeared through the door of his bedroom, murmuring something that sounded like "leaving evidence."

Eren heard her throw the garment into his laundry basket and sigh loudly. Mikasa reappeared in the doorway, making a face. "You didn't make your bed."

He shrugged, readjusting himself in his chair. "I'm just gonna sleep in it later."

Mikasa huffed, but rested her forearms on his shoulders once she reached him, dropping her head down next to his.

Eren felt a smirk pull at his lips as he purposefully turned his head away to face Armin's back. The blonde had finished with whatever mixing he'd been doing, and instead was filling the small cupcake tin with batter.

"Are those-"

"Yes," Armin interrupted. "They're chocolate chip."

"Dude, I think I'm in love with you." The blonde only laughed, dropping the supplies into the sink to be washed later. "Don't tell Mikasa."

"Make sure there's some for your parents when they visit tomorrow," Armin shook his head; Mikasa knocked her own temple against his.

"Maybe."

Mikasa's warm breath fanned against his cheek as she sighed again, making him stifle a shiver and turn his head back towards her. "Did you finish your homework?"

Eren rolled his eyes. She was always hounding him about his schoolwork, especially once hers ended and his senior year rolled around. "No."

"Eren."

"I'll do it later!"

"_Eren."_

She pushed away from him, dragging his chair away from the table and ignoring his cry of surprise as she tugged his t-shirt away from his chest. Eren's eyes widened when he realized exactly what she'd found- exactly what he'd forgotten to hide from her.

Mikasa gently ran her fingers over the large, purple and blue bruise that marred almost half of Eren's collarbone, biting her lip in an attempt not to chew him out right away. Before he could say something, Mikasa expertly pulled his shirt over his head, revealing more bruises dotting his chest and stomach.

"Mika-"

"What happened?" She asked quietly.

Eren sighed, stifling a groan because by now she'd probably guessed what happened and was putting the pieces together from the last time she saw his bare chest. "I got into a fight with Jean," he mumbled, looking away.

"Why."

"He was being an asshole!"

She ignored him, standing up to retrieve an ice pack from the freezer. "Armin?"

The blonde was busy washing the dishes he'd used, sleeves rolled up to the elbows and bubbles clinging to his skin. "I think it started when they dared each other to hop the fence outside of the park." He said over the spray of the water. "Next thing Marco and I knew they were hitting each other by the swing set over a difference in opinion. Or maybe about who should get the good swing. I wasn't really paying attention." No one paid the young adults much mind when they started squabbling. "They're pretty lucky there were no kids there, though."

Mikasa pursed her lips, turning back around to press the ice pack on Eren's chest. He had stood from the chair to defend himself and place all the blame on Jean, but anything he was going to say was cut off at the cold press of ice. He jerked away on instinct, but Mikasa held onto his elbow, keeping him in place.

She dropped his shirt onto his chair, frowning as she tried to cover the largest bruise with the ice pack. Eren took her hand, wrapping his fingers around her wrist and tugging the pack away from his bare skin. "S'okay Mikasa. Armin already made me nurse them when we got back from the park."

Mikasa didn't look convinced, but she tossed the ice pack to Armin, who'd turned around to put a few spoons away. She sighed, waiting until the freezer door had closed to say anything else. "Eren-"

"I know, Mikasa."

She glared at him when he looked away, staring at a spot on the floor. Eren loved Mikasa more than anyone he knew, loved her to death, but her lectures got old fast and her glares still scared the shit out of him.

Mikasa wiggled the hand Eren was still holding until she could link their fingers together, ducking her head to try and meet her boyfriend's gaze. "Eren," she tried again, her tone a bit softer. The boy sighed, finally looking back at her. "You're almost finished with college. I thought you were done picking fights."

"I know! And I'm sorry, but Jean's such a prick and-"

"And nothing, Eren. How are you going to survive in a hospital if you punch every person you disagree with?"

Eren grumbled, looking away again, but he knew the conversation would stay at a standstill until he either gave in or fought her enough that she rolled her eyes and went to work on a case. He met her expectant gaze, sighing. "You're right. I'll try to refrain from punching Jean when he's being a moron."

"Eren," Mikasa groaned, going off on another spiel about growing up and not acting like a child, especially at a place where actual children might be playing and moms could complain and get them in trouble, but Eren wasn't listening.

He stared down at her, eyes flickering from their joined hands, to her face, to Armin who seemed more content to lean against the fridge and watch the conversation than come to his friend's aid, and back to Mikasa. He frowned. When had he gotten taller than her? Last time he checked, which admittedly wasn't recently, they'd been about the same height, but now Mikasa had to cock her head back to see him properly at the proximity, and he had to tuck his chin a little.

She was still lecturing him even though Eren's mind was far from the topic of what she was mad about. He heard her huff before continuing. She was so beautiful, even when she was reprimanding him for his childish behavior. She was always beautiful and Eren wondered for the millionth time how he'd been so lucky to get to spend his life with her, and then even date her.

"Eren, are you even- mmph!"

He leaned forward quickly, cutting her off with a firm press of his mouth to hers. Mikasa's free hand curved around his shoulder, and he covered it with his own hand as he stepped closer to her. Eren grinned against her lips, slanting his mouth over hers in an attempt to deepen the kiss, but Mikasa shoved hard against his chest, making him grunt, as they broke apart. She always had been stronger than him.

"Mikasa…?"

The girl glared at him, cheeks flushed, before turning on her heel and stalking into Eren's bedroom, grumbling the entire way. Eren frowned.

The timer on the over beeped, echoing loudly in the silent room. Eren watched Armin don a pink oven mitt, (he didn't even know why the two of them _had _a pink oven mitt), and pull the trays of cupcakes from the oven, turning off the heat afterwards.

"Armin," his best friend tugged off the mitt, turning to face Eren. "What did I do?"

Armin laughed, taking a few steps forward and clapping his friend on the shoulder. "She was scolding you and you kissed her in the middle of her rant."

"So?"

The blonde sighed. "You can't just kiss her when she's mad at you."

"Why not?" Eren's face scrunched slightly in confusion. "She looked cute, and I really wanted to kiss her."

"Eren," Armin sighed again, shaking his head.

"I can hear you." Mikasa's voice rang through the apartment. She must've been pretty close to Eren's door.

Eren paused before calling back, "I love you!"

The door to his room opened slowly, the groan of the hinges matching the one Mikasa voiced. Her scarf was pulled high over her mouth and nose, but Eren could still see the tiny flush of her cheeks. She sighed, walking out of the room and standing in the kitchen with the boys. Armin handed each of them a cupcake, grinning as he took a bite into his own.

Mikasa finally gave, shaking her head and tugging down her scarf, smiling brightly. Eren would never tire of seeing it.

"You're insufferable, Eren Jaeger."

Eren smirked, speaking around his own mouthful of cupcake, "You know you love me."

Mikasa chucked his discarded shirt at his face, throwing him her own smirk as Armin's laughter filled the kitchen.


	3. Reassurance

**Reassurance**

Mikasa didn't want to be a squad leader, didn't want the burden that came with it. Eren's determined to make her feel better about the new responsibility.

**A/N:** A little thing that was kicking around my head for a while. Set after ch 59, after they rescue Eren.

* * *

><p>Mikasa never liked strategy meetings. She knew they were necessary, of course, but after months of listening to Commander Erwin, and then Hanji, speak, she was absolutely tired of them. She would much rather skip them and find out what she needed to do from Armin or the Captain.<p>

That, obviously, wasn't an option, so even though she wanted to be training before the mission next week, Mikasa was standing by the threshold of the door, gaze trained on the table in the middle of the room.

The rest of Levi's squad sat around the table while Commander Hanji gestured excitedly to maps and plans and explained exactly what was going to happen.

"We'll explain this all to the other soldiers in the morning," Hanji said, collecting a few maps as everyone visibly relaxed in their seats.

"One more thing," Levi interrupted their next spiel from where he stood at the other side of the threshold. He pushed away from the wall, standing behind Hanji. "Ackerman will be leading a squad."

"_What_?" Mikasa was sure she'd misheard. She hadn't been in the Survey Corps for more than a few months, and had only gone on one official mission! There was no way she could lead people out in the field!

She frowned, glancing away from the table and to her Captain. In the corner of her eye, she saw Eren exchange a confused glance with Armin, while the others looked as if they expected a fight. Which might not be far off.

Levi regarded her coolly. She may trust him more than she had before, but he was making a mistake. "You will be leading a squad on the mission. The members of the squad will be assigned in a day or so."

"No."

"You don't have a choice, Mikasa."

She crossed her arms at her chest, muscles tightening as she shifted her weight. "Aren't we fine with the leaders we have? Why can't someone else do it?"

Now Levi looked almost exasperated. "In case you haven't noticed, since Mike died we're a little fucking short on squad leaders. You will be doing this. I'll explain strategies in the morning."

A cold, tense silence settled over the room as Levi walked out, leaving Mikasa to stew in her own thoughts, jaw clenching; she couldn't imagine herself leading a squad.

Hanji laughed awkwardly, running their hand through their messy hair. "Well, meeting's over anyway. I'll see you back here for the last one next week."

Mikasa turned on her heel, stalking out of the room and into the hall, intent on getting to her room and trying to find a way out of becoming a squad leader at fifteen. She barely made it to an adjacent hallway before she heard the voices of her squad mates behind her, heard someone running, and calling out to her.

"Mikasa! Mikasa, hey, wait!" Eren grabbed her wrist, forcing her to a stop and turning her to face him. She dropped her eyes to the floor, mouth twisting. "What's wrong?"

"I can't be a squad leader, Eren," she murmured after a pause.

She looked up in time to see him frown. "Why not? You're one of the strongest people I know. If anyone can lead a squad, it's you."

Taking an unsteady breath, Mikasa linked their fingers, leaning forward to rest her forehead against his chest. "I can't be responsible for someone's death." She felt his breathing hitch, and she knew he understood. "I'll be giving them orders, telling them when to fight… If something goes wrong, it'll be my fault."

"I can't promise you that nothing will go wrong, Mikasa." Eren said quietly, wrapping his free arm around her shoulder as her own fingers looped through one of his belts. "But it's a simple mission. We're just going out to try and find anything on that Ape Titan… thing." She nodded against him. "Think of all the people you'll save by deploying some of the best soldiers at the best times. I asked Levi, right before I came to you, where you'd be, and he said your squad would be right next to his. That means Levi, me, and the rest of the squad are going to be right there to help."

Mikasa pulled back, trying to read Eren's expression as they stood. He looked like… he really believed she could do this. "What if something goes awry, and people do die under my command?"

"That's the price of what we do," Eren whispered, so quietly she might of missed it if they weren't so close. "We know that better than anyone, but we have to fight anyway. Without you as a squad leader, the formation would get fucked up and there would probably be a lot more casualties."

Mikasa was silent for a moment, weighing the situation in her head. She really didn't have a choice anyway, so she had to do her best to keep her subordinates alive. Plus, she would have Levi near her, and she'd be close enough to protect Eren, and they could both keep Armin safe. People might die, but Eren was right. Soldiers died all the time, especially on missions; she would work hard to keep that number at a minimum.

"Okay." She whispered back.

Eren smiled, a small pull of his lips that made her heart stutter. "You're going to kick ass, Mikasa." He pressed his lips to her temple, squeezing her hand. "And I'll be there, right next to you. We'll keep each other and everyone else alive."

* * *

><p>Of course, no mission was ever simple, or ever went according to plan. Mikasa's squad, made up of five veteran soldiers who were initially wary of taking orders from a teenager, was separated from Levi's about halfway through. They'd been ambushed, and Mikasa's orders to fight the Titans were directly opposite Levi's to continue on.<p>

After fighting off the horde, with no casualties in her squad, they had rested for a moment in the trees before re-joining the formation. By that time, Levi's squad was far ahead, and Mikasa was unable to find Eren or Armin or the others before they had to head back to the walls.

On the way back, her squad was sent in front of the formation with a couple others, with orders to keep the Titans at bay. The Corps had a lot of injured, and needed to get back without any more issues.

Mikasa didn't know if they had found the information on the Ape Titan they needed, but she would find out in the morning during the meeting.

The young woman ducked out of the infirmary, raking a hand through her hair and releasing a frustrated sigh. Eren wasn't in there, and neither were any of her old squad mates. Were they…? No. They survived. She knew it.

She finally found Eren a little after dinner, where she'd found the rest of her friends, closing the door to Hanji's study behind him.

"Eren."

He looked up, a grin splitting his features as he jogged to meet her halfway down the hall. "See?" He almost laughed, taking her hands in his. "I knew you could do it."

And she would do it again, as many times as it took, until the Titans were gone and she could see that smile as often as possible.


	4. Palette

**Palette**

Eremika Week Day 1- Makeup; When Eren is woken up way, way too early one morning, he doesn't expect the culprit to be his girlfriend, learning to do her makeup with his mom. Mikasa 100% does Eren's makeup and it's 100% incredible.

* * *

><p>The soft, muted sound of voices straining through the wall stirred Eren from his sleep. He tried to bury himself deeper into his blankets, but the voices were persistent, a bright laugh, a sharp scream, and he knew he wasn't getting back to sleep. Rolling over, Eren grabbed his phone to check the time, it wasn't even 8am <em>on a Saturday<em>, who the hell was up so damn early, anyway?

He groaned, shoving his blankets to the foot of his bed and standing, fetching a shirt he deemed clean enough before wandering from his bedroom, one hand running lazily through his hair. Eren could hear the voices down the hall, muffled still, but at least he knew he wasn't making them up. His dad was at the hospital, and he didn't think his mom would have any friends over this early in the morning, but there were definitely two people speaking.

Taking the stairs two at a time, Eren ducked through the hallway to get to the bathroom, where a few peals of laughter echoed just as he arrived. Frowning, he pushed open the door, revealing his mom, her back to him as she leaned around someone, directing their hand as they swiped a small, black thing across their eyelid. His mom stood back up, her smile reflected in the mirror as she gripped Mikasa's shoulders, squeezing gently. What was Mikasa doing over so early? Granted she came over all the time, but more times than not it was to see Eren.

"Oh, it looks wonderful, dear. You're a natural at this."

"Thank you, Carla." Mikasa turned back to the mirror above the sinks, balancing her elbow precariously on the small shelf below the mirror as she swept the black eyeliner across her other eye before reaching for a small tube, shaking it gently and applying the mascara to her lashes. "What do you think?" His mom laughed gently. "Perfect. I told you it wasn't difficult."

Mikasa smiled, her eyes flitting back to the mirror, where she seemed to finally notice Eren standing at the door. She ducked under his mom's arm, pressing a kiss to his cheek when she stood before him. "Hi," she said, taking his hand. "Did we wake you?"

"Uh, yeah, but it's fine." Eren said, glancing between her and his mom. "Why-?"

Mikasa blinked slowly, tugging his hand, "Eren, do you like it?"

A thin, black line stretched from the corner of each of Mikasa's eyelids to the other end, where the eyeliner flared into a sharp curve. He recognized his mom's favorite eyeshadow, too, the color emphasizing the small flecks of color swimming in her dark eyes, the mascara pushing her lashes up way farther than he thought eyelashes could go, the blush giving her cheeks a flushed look, one he usually only saw when she was really embarrassed or had been laughing for long. But she was still Mikasa, even under all of the makeup.

"It looks really amazing, you look beautiful." He ran a hand over the back of his neck, feeling heat rise to his cheeks as he avoided his mom's knowing smile. "But, Mikasa, you don't need that stuff to look pretty. You always look, y'know, you've always been-"

"I know," she interrupted with a laugh, leaning over to kiss him quickly. "I thought knowing how to do it would come in handy, though, for dates or parties, or something." Mikasa shrugged, tilting her head back to his mom. "So I asked Carla for help, turn out this stuff is a lot easier than I assumed."

"Plus," his mom ruffled her hair, smiling brightly. "I've always wanted to pass down the wisdom of makeup. Mikasa's a fast learner, and an absolute natural. You'll be breaking hearts with your eyeliner before you know it."

"Oh my god, mom." Eren groaned, pressing his face to Mikasa's shoulder. She threaded her fingers into his hair as she laughed along with his mom, her gentle caresses through his hair nearly putting him to sleep again.

His mom nudged him gently as she passed. "I'll make some breakfast. Is Armin coming over later?"

"Probably," Eren answered, his lips against Mikasa's collarbone. Once he was sure his mom was gone he pulled away, Mikasa's grip on his hair preventing him from getting too far. He cleared his throat, looking away as she arched a slender eyebrow. "You do look really pretty, Mikasa. With or without the makeup."

"Thank you, Eren." She kissed him again, slowly, as she tugged him farther into the bathroom with her. When she broke the kiss, she pushed the makeup on the counter into a small bag, moving it to one of the shelves and tapping the counter with two fingers.

He rolled his eyes, but hopped up onto the counter regardless, locking his ankles around the small of her back when she stood directly in front of him. Mikasa dug into the small bag, producing the eyeliner she'd previously used on her own eyes.

"Mikasa-"

She uncapped the eyeliner. "I need to practice more." Her bottom lip pushed out as her eyes widened, resting her hands on his knees as she pouted up at him. Eren groaned, hanging his head in defeat; he couldn't refuse her anything, especially not when she looked at him like that. Mikasa hooked a finger under his chin, pressing a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth before positioning his face where she needed it to be. "Hold still," she murmured.

He complied, resting his hands on her waist as she fumbled about his face, whispering when to close his eyes or tilt his face so she could get the proper angle. Eren paid pretty close attention to what she was using, (he may have gotten distracted staring into her eyes when her face was close to his,) and he noticed right away when she grabbed a tube of something she hadn't used on her own face.

"Part your lips," Mikasa said, holding the lipstick below his chin.

Eren rolled his eyes. "You're not wearing lipstick."

"This isn't my shade."

"But it's mine?"

She nodded, her nose brushing against his chin. "Yup." Mikasa dragged the lipstick across his lower lip. From the awkward angle he couldn't see the shade she was applying, but something told him it didn't look good.

Mikasa told him to close his lips but just before he did he grumbled, "It's not my shade, is it?" The soft lift of her lips into a smirk was all the answer he needed. She had him press his lips together in such a way to spread the lipstick around before using a small tissue to wipe at the corners of his mouth, stepping out of his hold once she'd finished.

"Done," Mikasa announced, sly grin still in place. She reached into the drawer, pulling out a small hand mirror and handing it to him.

His eyeliner matched hers almost exactly, except she'd extended it down to his lower lid as well, the eyeshadow she'd chosen was a dark brown and green, and even shimmery, and Eren had to admit that it made his eyes look really fucking good. Mikasa had used a little bit of mascara, and blush, but Eren got distracted by the shade of the lipstick. It was a horrendous, bright purple color, standing out on his face proudly. Why did his mom even _have_ that color?

"Well?" She prompted, pulling the mirror from his immediate gaze. Mikasa bit her lip, trying to hold back her grin but her constant glances to his lips betrayed her.

"Holy shit, Mikasa." He shook his head, letting her take the mirror and put it away. "It really is my shade." She snorted, swatting his hand away when he reached to poke at his eyeliner. "It looks awesome," he said, dropping his head to press a wet kiss to her cheek. "Mom was right, you're really good at this stuff."

Mikasa pushed his face away, laughing loudly. "Ugh," she wiped her hand across her cheek, a bright purple streak of his lipstick staining both the back of her hand and her cheek. "You got lipstick on me."

"What do you know," Eren grinned, wrapping his legs around her waist to pull her close again, her fingers threading with his. He touched his finger to the lipstick on her cheek, smearing it onto her cheekbone and down to the corner of her mouth. "It's your shade, too." He dipped his head to kiss her, but Mikasa ducked away, twisting in his embrace and pulling her phone from her pocket. "Mika-" He warned, resting his chin on the top of her head, but she only grinned, raising the phone in front of them and snapping a few pictures. He played along after the first couple, making goofy faces and pouting his lips like he'd seen Christa doing.

She flicked through the pictures on her phone, pausing on one where Eren was grinning, his eyes trained on Mikasa's face as she smiled softly below him with her thumb hooked over her shoulder. Mikasa started tapping rapidly at her phone, and Eren recognized what she was doing immediately.

"Mikasa, no!" He tried to reach for the phone, but she held it out of his reach, arching her back to keep him at bay.

"Just on Twitter, Eren."

"You have almost six hundred followers!"

She hit the 'tweet' button. "Only half of them go to our school." Shutting off her phone, she turned to press a kiss to his cheek while Eren watched in dismay as her phone began to light up with notifications ranging from favorites to replies to re-tweets, or in Ymir's case, all three with an announcement that she'd saved the picture to use at their wedding. Connie replied that it was now his Twitter header, Sasha did the same.

"You're ridiculous," he sighed.

Mikasa smiled, linking their hands and resting them on her stomach. "That's why you love me."

"Hm." Eren ran his nose along the top of her head, squeezing his legs around her waist. "Pretty sure that's not the only reason." He dropped a kiss to the back of her neck, smirking when she sighed breathlessly and tilted her head.

"Eren, Mikasa breakfast is ready." His mom popped her head into the bathroom. Eren pulled his nose from Mikasa's neck, eyeing his mom with a small grin as she appraised his new look. "The eyeliner looks absolutely flawless, Mikasa," she laughed.

Mikasa stepped out of his embrace, standing next to his mom. "Thank you. But I think what really seals the deal is the-"

"Lipstick," his mom laughed again. "Oh, dear, I hope you got pictures."

"Plenty," Mikasa answered, taking Eren's hand as he jumped down from the counter.

Eren rolled his eyes, stalking ahead of Mikasa and his mom to get to the kitchen, where a small spread of pancakes and eggs and fruit awaited them. He quickly fixed two plates, handing one to Mikasa and the other to his mom as they turned into the room. Mikasa suggested he wipe off the lipstick before eating to avoid tasting the makeup but he refused, leaning against the countertop as he took a large bite of pancakes.

"Eren," his mom said after a minute, pointing a forkful of strawberry at him. "I do hope you'll be wearing that out tonight."

"On one condition," he said around his mouthful of pancakes. He bumped Mikasa's hip, grinning over at his mom. "Mikasa wears the lipstick, too."


	5. Shark Bait

**Shark Bait**

Eremika Week Day 2- Hardcore; Back in high school, Eren and Jean made a bet for who could look cooler jumping over a tank of sharks on a motorcycle. Now, even though Jean's already left for school, Eren's determined to win the bet, and Mikasa is less than pleased.

* * *

><p>"No."<p>

"Mikasa!"

"No."

"It's just one time!" Eren begged, clasping his hands together under his chin. Mikasa rolled her eyes, ducking around him in an attempt to get into his house, but Eren was very adamant about keeping her right there on the doorstep, matching her movements and blinking sporadically at her as if his bright eyes would change her mind. Well, they had before. But not this time.

Mikasa shook her head. "No, Eren. You'll get yourself killed."

"No I won't," he groaned. He batted his eyes again, jutting out his lower lip. Then he stopped, dropping his hands with a small grin. Mikasa felt her heartbeat quicken because he must have realized- "Why am I even asking? I got everything I need in…" Eren turned on his heel, moving across the kitchen and towards the garage. "Here!"

"Eren, wait!" She dropped her bag on the floor, following him through the house. She flung open the door to the garage, grimacing as she watched Eren inspect the old bike in the back corner. "Eren-"

"It's in surprisingly good shape," Eren said, eyes flashing briefly to hers. "Maybe dad's been working on it." He kneeled by the bike, tugging the sheet off and allowing it to crumple on the ground. He ran his fingers over the smooth paint, ducking his head as he examined it. "Definitely should check out the breaks," he murmured. "Ah, but I'm sure the local shop can do that quickly." Eren stood back up, letting his fingers linger on the _Harley Davidson _logo on the side before he leaned against the wall, crossing his arms and grinning victoriously.

Mikasa resisted the urge to sigh, to stomp her foot or go complain to his parents. When he'd first made the bet with Jean, Mikasa had thought they'd forget, (they'd made it during their sophomore year of high school, after all,) but after discovering Grisha's old motorcycle in the garage, Eren had remembered the bet and was determined not to lose. But Jean had already left for a summer course before college started that fall, so Annie had offered to fill in for him. If Eren could jump the bike through a ring of fire and over a small shark tank, and Annie couldn't, (or vice versa,) then he would win. In typical Jean and Eren betting fashion, there was no prize; only bragging rights for who'd looked cooler doing it.

"Please don't do this," Mikasa whispered after another moment, leaning heavily on the threshold to the garage. "Annie's a dirt biker, she's been doing this since she was eight!"

Eren scoffed. In all her years of knowing him, Eren had not once backed down from a bet. Granted, most of the bets he and Jean came up with were harmless; who could make the substitute teacher snap first, who could throw the most eraser shavings in Dr. Hanji's coffee… nothing that could kill them. "It's gonna be fine," he waved his arm, as if to dispel all of her concerns.

He tossed the tarp back over the bike, making sure it was secure before crossing the garage again, stopping just in front of her. He took her hands, pulling her closer and dropping a kiss to her hair. She relaxed, but only slightly.

"It'll be fine, Mikasa." He said, smoothing his thumb over her wrist. "It'll be…" Eren grinned, his head tilting as it always did when he had a breakthrough. "It'll be hardcore."

"It'll be deadly is what it will be," she grumbled, ignoring how proud Eren looked over declaring the act to be extreme. "I really don't think you should do this." "I know." He wasn't deterred in the slightest by her negativity, if anything he only looked more excited at the prospect of challenging Annie.

Mikasa knew she wasn't going to change his mind, he was glancing back to the bike eagerly, most likely planning the best time in the morning to take the bike to the shop. She tried one more thing. "School starts in a couple of months. What if you get hurt?"

Eren shrugged, looking back to her with his lopsided grin. "Then I'll have a cast for orientation, it's not the worst thing in the world." Mikasa hung her head, exhaling sharply. He really wasn't going to give this up. Eren dropped one of her hands, tilting her chin up to face him again. "You'll still come, right?"

"Of course," she said. "Someone's got to be there to get you to a hospital."

"Isn't Bertholdt an EMT?"

"Not the same thing, Eren."

He grinned again, kissing her cheek. "This is gonna be fucking sweet. Besides, how hard can it be?"

Apparently, very hard.

Grisha had taught Eren how to ride the bike when he was fifteen, and after only a few practice runs around the block, (and one crash that resulted in a scraped elbow,) once the bike came back from the shop, he'd deemed himself ready. So a week after she'd finally accepted that he was going to do it, Mikasa found herself in the middle of a crowd of their friends and random spectators, sandwiched between Reiner and Armin on a set of makeshift bleachers facing an open parking lot, where a giant ring stood in front of a large, clear shark tank. Ymir had gotten the ring, the tank, and the sharks. When Mikasa had asked how, exactly, she'd gotten everything, Ymir had only laughed and said Mikasa probably didn't want to know.

About ten minutes before eight o'clock, Connie and Sasha finished setting up the ramp, and then Ymir lit the ring with a match, the flames licking up and around until they settled. Everything was set up. Mikasa could feel her heart in her throat, worst-possible scenarios flying through her mind. He was going to die. Her fucking boyfriend was going to get eaten by sharks, or catch on fire, or _something._

"Okay," Ymir announced, clapping her hands quickly. The parking lot wasn't big enough or filled with enough people for her to need a megaphone. Sasha jumped onto Connie's shoulders and they stood at the end of the bleachers. "Annie's gonna go first, and if Eren does a better jump, or she dies and he doesn't, he'll win. Annie?" she called to the tent set up opposite the bleachers.

A second later, Annie drove out on her bike, a black motorcycle that Mikasa was sure was taller than the blonde. She pulled off her helmet, mussing her bun slightly as she shook her head and adjusted the collar of her sweatshirt.

Reiner whooped right next to Mikasa's ear, yelling something about Annie kicking ass and throwing up his thumbs to her. Bertholdt was standing closer to the shark tank, but Mikasa saw him nod in Annie's direction. Annie ignored them both, appraising the challenge cooly, almost as if she were bored.

"Our friends are fucking morons," Armin whispered next to Mikasa, his palm pressed to his temple. She nodded in agreement. "Hey, Marco," Armin turned to the boy standing behind them. "Did you call Jean?"

"Yep, I've got him on FaceTime right now." Marco said, turning the screen of his phone to Armin. Jean waved slightly, glancing between Armin and Mikasa. "You sure you don't want to call this off, Jean?"

"_No way_," Jean said. "_I want to see Jaeger get his ass kicked and lose_."

"You're not even here," Mikasa said dully. "This isn't a bet anymore, it's an opportunity for Eren and Annie to break themselves." Jean spluttered something behind her, but she ignored him, turning back to face Annie and Ymir.

Annie met her eyes, slowly raising her hand to her head and tapping two fingers against her forehead, saluting Mikasa silently. Mikasa nodded back.

"Here we go!" Ymir laughed, jogging over to where Bertholdt stood.

Annie put her helmet back on, securing the strap at her chin before taking her mark. Ymir waved her arms as a 'go', and Annie revved her engine, kicking her foot up and heading directly for the ramp, her hood blowing out behind her. Mikasa feared it would catch on fire, but Annie got through the flames and over the shark tank easily, her front tire connecting with the small ramp at the end easily as she maneuvered herself to a stop.

Ymir clapped again, "Nice job, Annie! Eren, are you ready?" Eren drove out on his own bike, his green striped helmet glinting harshly under the street lamps. "Okay, Eren, Annie did the stunt perfectly, so if you fuck up she wins. But if you don't, we go to the judges," Ymir gestured to herself, winking. "To see who looked cooler. Got it?" Eren nodded, walking his bike to the start. Mikasa bit her lip, grasping Armin's hand tightly in hers. She heard Jean say something behind her but her heart was pounding too loudly in her ears to catch it. Armin squeezed her hand gently as Eren revved his engine, Ymir waving her arms next to Bertholdt to signal his start.

Eren kicked his foot up, speeding to the ramp and taking off just like Annie had. Mikasa's breath left her as he cleared the shark tank, avoiding burning alive and getting eaten by sharks that Mikasa was sure were illegal. His front wheel touched down, but instead of driving smoothly over to where Annie was waiting, the wheel twisted sharply, his back wheel turning way too fast before the bike fell, crashing against the ground and sending Eren sprawling, skidding until he came to a stop a few feet away, crumpled in on himself.

Mikasa screamed, pushing through the people in front of her to run across the pavement, not far behind Bertholdt, Ymir, and Annie. Annie tossed her helmet to the ground, sliding next to Eren, gently pulling his helmet off of his head, her hands hovering over his back.

"Bertholdt?" She asked, glancing up at Bertholdt as he dropped next to her.

"Help me get him onto his back."

"Eren!" Ymir caught Mikasa before she could get to his side. "I'm not going to get in the way," Mikasa snapped, twisting her way from Ymir's hold. She fell to the ground next to Eren, across from Annie. Mikasa pushed his hair away from his face, touching her fingers to his neck and sighing in relief when she felt his pulse, strong and secure and familiar beneath the skin.

"Eren?" Bertholdt asked, helping Mikasa to get him to a sitting position. He was leaning heavily on Mikasa's side, finally opening his eyes to glance around him. Ymir was hovering, worriedly, Historia and the rest of their friends standing a few feet back. Armin sat down next to Annie. "How are you feeling?"

"Uh," Eren turned from her, spitting harshly, blood splattering onto the asphalt. "Got all my teeth, but uh, my arm hurts like a bitch."

"Annie?" Mikasa demanded, leaning slightly over Eren's body to check his arm.

"No wonder," Annie said after a pause. "It's fucking broken. I can see the bone."

"Fuck," Eren gasped, face distorting with pain. "Fuck, yeah, that hurts."

"Bertholdt," Mikasa said, taking Eren's hand. He didn't complain, only squeezed it harshly as he grimaced in pain again. "Call an ambulance." Bertholdt nodded, standing up to fish his phone from his pocket, turning his back from the crowd to talk with the operator.

Eren groaned quietly, closing his eyes. Mikasa tightened her arm around his shoulder, taking care to avoid where Annie was still supporting his broken arm. Carla and Grisha were going to _flip_; they didn't even know about the bet!

"Eren," Armin leaned forward, touching the back of his hand to Eren's forehead. "Eren, don't fall asleep, you could have a concussion." Eren grumbled something incoherent, but he opened his eyes again, staring straight up at Mikasa.

"Is it bad?" He asked quietly.

Mikasa glanced to his other arm, where the white of his bone protruded slightly from his forearm, blood dripping onto the ground and she shook her head. "You're going to be fine."

"Not what I asked," Eren laughed.

"Ambulance is on its way," Bertholdt said, sitting next to Eren's head again. "They'll be here in a few minutes, your dad's on call so you should get into surgery pretty quickly."

If at all possible, Eren's face drained of even more color. "Fuck, I forgot he was working late tonight."

Mikasa ran her fingers through his hair. "It'll be okay Eren."

"Uh Eren," Ymir said, lips turned in a small smirk. Eren looked over to her, smiling as well. "Despite how great that fall was, hate to say it but Annie still won."

"Figured," Eren said, grinning at Annie. She rolled her eyes, grumbling something about breaking his arm again herself if he tried something that stupid again. "Did Jean see?"

Marco piped up from a few feet away. "Yes, and he is sorry that you got hurt." Eren snorted.

The ambulance pulled into the parking lot, a few paramedics jumping out and gathering around Eren. They asked a few preliminary questions before pushing Mikasa away to help Eren to his feet. Mikasa stayed close to him as they walked to the ambulance, where one of the paramedics helped him onto the gurney. She ignored the woman who told her she wasn't allowed to ride with him in the ambulance.

"You're an idiot," Mikasa sighed, taking his hand again as the ambulance began to move. She leaned forward, kissing his forehead gently.

"I know," Eren said, leaning into her touch on his cheek. "But you gotta admit that was cool."

It was, but she'd never tell. "Your parents are going to kill you, and your arm is broken."

"Totally worth it."


	6. Again and Again

**Again and Again**

Eremika Week Day 3- Soulmate; He knew her, he was completely sure of it, but as the years dragged on and his life began anew, he wasn't so sure if she was anything more than a fabrication created to appease his weary mind. Until he meets her again.

* * *

><p>He knew her.<p>

He's absolutely sure of it, that she was out there somewhere, living a life completely separate from his own, surrounded by people who know her, know who she is now, know her favorite color, or her ticks or fears while he is left far away and in the dark.

He remembers everything about her from the last time he saw her, bloodied and lifeless in a beautiful field, motionless even as the survivors danced in the wake of a victory. And while he couldn't remember exactly what they were celebrating, he knew he wasn't able to. Nothing felt okay, he couldn't be happy, not as he sobbed against her body, not as he realized he'd lost one of the few people who kept him tethered to his humanity.

He grew old, they all did. Armin said everything paled in comparison to the ocean, Jean became Commander of the remainder of the Survey Corps when Hanji retired, Sasha helped Historia to prepare the survivors of humanity to reconquer the world. They were heroes, all of them, deserving of every word of praise.

"You are too, Eren. You deserve this life more than anyone." Armin tried to convince him, dragged him away from the walls to set up a new life near the ocean, far away from where her presence still lingered, but he couldn't accept Armin's attempts, couldn't believe he'd done good, even as he grew and lived on without her, that he'd done anything right, especially to her.

He'd promised, hadn't he? He swore to her they would always be together, and for the longest time, through the most difficult challenges, he truly thought he would get to be with her. In the end, though, he'd lost her, unable to give her the life she always dreamed of. He'd failed her, and somehow that outweighed anything he'd accomplished.

Even now, after waking up in new worlds, new lives, he was never with her. Perhaps his failure from before would keep her far away from him now, in a place where her dreams could flourish, a place without his presence to taint everything she had.

She was once his warmth, his ever-present constant to help him through the obscene things they endured, his light when the post-shifting haze threatened to steal him away from everything he'd known as she held him close, running her hands and fingers through his hair and across the expanse of his back, whispering words of reassurance to his sweat-slicked skin. In a world he could barely remember anymore, one thing always stood out, her; her dark hair, her subtle, rare smile, the way she vehemently believed in him, in Armin, in all of their comrades and how she'd sing to him, locked together in an embrace after a terrible mission, her beautiful voice keeping him captivated through the night.

Eren knew her, but he didn't know her name, didn't know where, (or if,) she was in this new life.

He knew her, he was sure, but as the years dragged on and the lives began anew, he thought maybe he only knew of her. And he didn't know if that was any better.

* * *

><p>"Eren." He felt a finger dig into his shoulder blade, moving to poke at his neck when Eren groaned and tried to shove his face even farther into his pillow. "Eren, get up." The finger returned, this time shoved against the back of his skull.<p>

Eren finally rolled over, glaring up at best friend. "What, Armin?"

"Get up," Armin repeated, pulling Eren's blankets away from his body. The chill of mid-winter air shocked him into an upright position, reaching for his blankets but Armin kept them at bay. "You're going out."

"We're off from university," Eren groaned, leaning over the side of his bed to find a sweatshirt and pull it over his head. "And Christmas is next week, what the fuck are we going to do?"

Armin shook his head, pointing to Eren's closet. "Not we, you. Get dressed and meet me in the kitchen."

Eren cursed under his breath, toying with the idea of falling back asleep, but Armin wasn't above calling his mom to come help drag Eren out of bed, and he really didn't feel like being doused with ice water that morning so he stood up, searching through his closet for only a moment before changing into jeans and a new sweatshirt. He made a quick stop to the bathroom before finding Armin at the kitchen table, a cup of coffee held tightly between his hands.

"Okay," Eren said once he'd downed half of his own cup. "The fuck's goin' on?"

Armin slid a ticked across the table. "You're going," he announced as Eren read over the ticket. _Sina National Museum is proud to present the grand opening of the Survey Corps Exhibit. December 17-28th only. Admit one._

"Survey Corps?" Eren tossed the ticked back to the table, the name of the exhibit stirring something inside his head. Was it a famous exhibit? It couldn't be- the ticket said it was the opening. Maybe something he'd learned in class. "I'm not going."

"Oh yes you are," Armin pushed the ticket back to him, the flimsy material curling up against his fingertips.

"Armin, I don't even know what a Survey Corps is. Why should I go to the fuckin' exhibit?" Eren asked, tipping his coffee back to his lips, pausing before he finished. "Do you even know what the Survey Corps is?"

"Yes," Armin said, rolling his eyes. "We learned about it in school. And you're going."

"But-"

"You haven't left this apartment since the semester ended, Eren. I know you're pissed that you can't remember this girl-"

"You don't even believe she exists!"

Armin frowned, staring at him as if Eren were denying that it was his dog they'd found lying in the street. It was an expression Eren had become very familiar with since sharing his botched dreams with Armin. "You don't know anything about her. Her name, where she lives, if she's even in the damn country! I think it's time you-"

"Don't," Eren interrupted, heat burning his cheeks at the way his voice wavered. "I'm not givin' up on her, not until I find her or get concrete proof that she never fuckin' existed, okay?"

"Okay," Armin sighed. "But you're still going." He grasped Eren's hand, placing the ticket against his palm and folding his fingers over it.

Eren scowled, reading over the ticket again. He'd only been to the national museum a few times with his parents or on school trips, but none of the exhibits had ever really interested him. "Are you goin'?" He asked after a long pause.

"No. You need to get out of the apartment and away from your thoughts." Armin stood, taking Eren's nearly empty cup and putting it with his own in the sink. "You need to get away from your thoughts, or they'll eat you alive."

Eren closed his eyes, bringing his fist to rest against his forehead. "They already have, Armin." From the moment she entered his dreams she'd haunted him. Her smile greeted him in the mirror, her laughter followed him as he walked through his campus, the songs she sang played endlessly in his mind. Eren could never remember what she said or sang to him, could never hold onto the dream long enough to catch her face or hear her name, and it had torn him apart for years.

Armin clapped a hand onto his shoulder, pulling him from her tormenting smile. "The exhibit started at noon and closes at nine. Please go."

Eren nodded, dropping the ticket into his sweatshirt pocket. "Okay, yeah okay I'll go and I'll let you know if this Survey Corps shit is any cool."

"I appreciate it."

Eren grabbed his jacket, wrapping his old scarf around his neck when Armin told him it was the coldest day so far this year. He kept the ticket in his pocket as he left the apartment, deciding to walk into town instead of taking a bus to the museum right away. He had hours before the exhibit closed, plus there was always the chance that it was really busy, and Eren wanted to avoid a crown of over-eager museum goers.

He found himself in a small cafe a few hours later, nursing another cup of coffee after ordering something for dinner, watching through the window as a light snow began to fall, slowly coating the sidewalk. The sky stayed a dark grey even as he left, the snow falling faster, the slush pushed over from the street soaking his toes while he made his way to the museum, his head bowed against the wind and snow.

It was empty inside the lobby, the fluorescent lights casting unflattering shadows in front of the statues lining the walls. The room was empty save for the security guard by the inner doors and the woman behind the front desk. Eren showed her his ticket and she nodded, pointing down a wing as she explained how to get to the exhibit.

"Just missed the rush, though." She said as Eren pocketed his ticket stub. She laughed gently, turning back to her computer. "But something tells me you don't mind."

Eren grumbled out a "thanks" before turning down the hall she'd indicated, hands in his pockets as he followed the signs deep into the museum. He pushed his way into the room, blinking at the sudden lowlight. He followed the path marked on the floor, reading the plaques as he passed each glass case.

_Humanity built three walls to keep the Titans at bay…_

The cases were filed with three shields, labeled Sina, Maria, and Rose, and depicting what each faction of the government did, who joined the military. He spent a few long moments standing in front of the uniform case, the cloaks reminding him of something.

_The Survey Corps ventured outside the walls to combat the Titans…_

_ The Coordinate led them to victory…_

_Names forgotten throughout history, but without them we would still be trapped inside those walls, or worse, devoured by the Titans…_

Eren had read most of this in his textbooks during school, how most information from almost three thousand years ago had been destroyed in a fire said to be started by angry ex-military policemen, so what was the big deal about the exhibit? Maybe that's why it was empty so close to closing time- people already knew everything there was about the Titan Reign.

Once he'd circled through the entire exhibit, Eren returned to the case with the cloaks for the Survey Corps, Garrison, and Military Police. He recognized the cloak with the overlapping wings, more so than just from textbooks or documentaries, and he realized then, why it was familiar. It was the cloak he saw her wearing in some of his dreams, when she draped it around the both of them as they lay together.

Is that all he knew her from? A fabrication he'd made up from pieces of a forgotten history?

Moving slightly, Eren saw a case he'd only skimmed through. There were three full uniforms in it, each from the Survey Corps, but there was a scarf hanging above one of them. He dipped his head to the plaque, reading quickly: _The Coordinate, the Woman Worth A Hundred Soldiers, and the most Brilliant Strategist led humanity to victory as they led squads and motivated their comrades to never give up. It is a true shame that we don't have their names, for we have these teenagers to thank for the lives we live today._

She wore that scarf, he knew, but there was no way he'd just been hallucinating about a war hero.

Right?

"Eren?"

He whirled, glancing around the exhibit he'd sworn had been empty before. A girl stepped around the corner, her dark hair tickling her shoulders as she leaned against one of the exhibit cases, a soft smile playing on her lips and he _knew_. He recognized that smile, shit it had haunted him for years.

"Mikasa?" He whispered, and her smile grew.

Mikasa pushed away from the case, stepping close to him until their faces almost touched. Eren gingerly cupped her cheeks. He wasn't sure, still, if this was just a dream, if he'd finally snapped after years of dreaming of her, if his mind had gone so far as to conjure her in front of him, but her skin was real, soft and smooth beneath his fingers as he held her.

She closed her eyes, leaning into his touch. "I wasn't crazy," she murmured against his wrist.

"You saw them, too?" Eren asked, running his thumb across the scar beneath her eye.

"Every night. My roommate tried to tell me you weren't real."

Eren laughed, resting his forehead against hers. "Mine too." He hesitated, his lips just above hers but she made the decision for them, stepping onto her toes to kiss him softly. "Fuck, I thought I made it all up." He said after they broke apart, her fingers cradling his jaw. "Do you know anything?"

Mikasa shook her head, but he didn't feel any remorse to the dreams he couldn't decipher. He had her, why'd he need to understand anyway? "I don't know why, but I knew I missed you."

"I missed you too, Mikasa." His dreams pushed their way to the front of his mind, but he found that the dread he used to feel at the sight of her smile had disappeared. "There's a good coffee shop a few blocks away. You wanna go?"

"Yes." She took his hand, but he stopped her before they could set off. She frowned up at him as he shook off his scarf, draping it around her neck. "Why-?"

"I don't know," Eren admitted, tossing the end of the scarf onto her face. "But it looks better on you." Mikasa smiled again, linking their fingers as they left the exhibit. She pulled the scarf over her nose as if she'd done it a hundred times before, and maybe in a way she had. Eren squeezed her hand, pulling her even closer as they walked the snow-covered streets. "Where'd you grow up?" She asked quietly, and Eren laughed, he laughed and he no longer feared that he'd done something wrong for she was with him, running with him across the street, and he was content to figure out everything about the woman laughing next to him.


	7. The Odds Are Never In Your Favor

**The Odds Are Never In Your Favor**

Eremika Week Day 4- Crossover; In an unprecedented decision, Eren volunteered to take Armin's place in the Games. He was determined to win and return to his mother, to Armin and Mikasa, to the life he'd come to know, but how could Eren plan a victory when his opponent was Mikasa, the girl he saved from death almost five years ago? [ Hunger Games AU ]

**A/N:** Ah, okay so I actually wanted to do a much longer crossover based solely on Mockingjay, where Mikasa was hijacked by the Capitol but I ran out of time. I still wanted to do Hunger Games, so consider this a kind of prologue to the main story, sort of more backstory to the characters and such. Expect a second installment from Mockingjay of the hijacking. So, enjoy!

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><p>"Armin Arlert!"<p>

The name echoed through the crowd of people, a few tensing up, but most let out quiet sighs of relief because they survived another year at the reaping and some would never have the chance to be called.

Eren Jaeger, however, felt neither of those things at that moment. He felt his heart sink, his breathing becoming uneasy as if it were his name that had been called, his destiny sealed to die in an arena for the entertainment of others. He saw the crowd of boys part a little ways away, where Armin was standing. To an outsider, he looked completely composed, ready to leave for the Capitol and be prepared to fight, but Eren knew his best friend better than that.

Armin was fucking terrified.

And for good reason, too. Armin had never fought, never hunted, never trained himself for the remote chance that his name would be called. In some ways, it wasn't surprising. Armin had placed his name in the pool several times in order to get more rations to care for his ailing grandfather. He might of had his name in there as many times as Eren. Eren caught Mikasa's eye across the masses, she looked just as horrified, her hand raised as if by will alone she could save Armin.

Eren watched, fixated to the spot, as Armin tried his best to square his shaking shoulders, his eyes fixated on the makeshift stage, where Petra Ral stood in front of a few Peacekeepers, her hair a bright array of colors, a genuine smile lighting her features.

Armin began to walk through the crowd, and before Eren realized it, he moved. Eren shoved his way through the other boys around him, nearly knocking them down as he fought to get out of the mob of children. He thought he heard Mikasa scream from somewhere in the girl's side, but he paid it no mind. Part of him demanded to stop, to allow himself another year of life, to take care of his mom and continue hunting to help the district, but he couldn't fucking let Armin be killed. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he stayed silent in the masses, allowing his best friend to leave, to die, to be alone as Eren and the other kids used his death.

Eren finally broke into the small area between the boys and girls, Peacekeepers marching towards him from in front of the stage. Armin had paused about halfway to Petra, and he turned back to face Eren, eyes puffy and expression distraught. When he realized what Eren was about to do, his eyes widened, and worried, Armin shook his head, mouthing that he couldn't.

But Eren was nothing if not stubborn.

"I volunteer." Eren announced for the first time in all of District 12's history, hands curling into fists at his sides. No fucking way Armin was being taken. "I volunteer as tribute."

Petra smiled at him, curling her hand in an invitation to join her on stage. With two peacekeepers flanking him, Eren marched right past Armin, who was gaping, eyes blinking frantically between Eren and the stage, his hand outstretched, as if to catch Eren and bring him to his senses, but a Peacekeeper took Armin's shoulder, pulling him back into the crowd.

"Fantastic," Petra sighed, placing a hand on Eren's shoulder to move him to the boy's side of the stage. This was really happening, his mind working quickly to come up with a plan. He was strong, he could return to the District and continue to take care of his loved ones, couldn't he? "And now, the ladies!" She dipped her hand into the other glass ball filled with little slips of paper, swirling her fingers around as she dipped farther into the paper, clutching one between two fingers as she raised it, shaking off the other papers. Whoever's name was on that slip of paper would be his enemy, nothing more than another victim who'd kill or be killed.

Eren shut his eyes, his nails digging into his palm as he waited, breath baited and urge to run rising in him like a storm.

"Mikasa Ackerman!"

No.

No, anyone but her. It couldn't fucking be her.

Eren swallowed thickly, watching as the crowd parted to allow Mikasa to walk through. Her steps did not falter, her head held high and eyes frantic as she made her way to the stage, holding Eren's gaze the entire time. Even the Peacekeepers chose to let her walk to Petra alone.

How the hell was he supposed to fight against _Mikasa_? How could he fight against his best friend, the girl who'd been living with him for five years! Mikasa, who'd learned to hunt so she could help him get more food for the District, who helped him do the dishes and sewed with his mom and even went to visit patients with his dad? He couldn't fucking kill her! She'd been one of the most important people in his life since… since the night he saved her life almost five years ago. The night he'd returned a bit too late from hunting, after he'd stashed his bow and turned to get back to his parents. But he'd noticed something, in an old, abandoned cabin on the outskirts of the District, a light was on in the window. He'd ignored the part of his mind telling him to leave, that it was none of his business, and instead he'd walked straight to the cabin, taking care of where he stepped and staying crouched to avoid being seen. Eren had peeked through the window, and immediately felt his blood boil at what he saw.

On the floor of the cabin, a young girl lay motionless, her hands tied tightly behind her back and her dark hair obscuring her face. A few feet away, a man sat in a chair, his arm thrown behind him, a carefree expression lighting his features as he spoke to the smaller man next to him. Eren wasn't able to hear everything, but what he'd caught solidified his resolve.

_"D'y'know how much they pay in the Capitol for a girl like her?"_

_ "When the country fell apart, these Asians fell with it. Fuck, we'll be set for life."_

_ "A big shot Capitol man wants a pretty fuck."_

Eren had quickly walked back to where he stashed his hunting tools and grabbed his knife before returning to the shed and knocking loudly. The conversation inside halted, and then the door opened, the larger of the two men looking around worriedly. When he saw Eren standing there, teary eyed with a lie about getting lost in the woods, he bent down, promising Eren that he was safe from any animals. Eren had immediately killed the man, and then repeatedly stabbed the second.

Untying the girl, Eren spoke softly, told her his name and asked for hers, asked what part of the district she lived in, if she was okay. She didn't say anything except her name and then, "there were three," and subsequently saved his life after the third returned and nearly choked him. He'd told Mikasa to live, and she did.

Afterwards, they stood awkwardly outside of the cabin. Mikasa tugging his jacket closer to her scrawny frame.

"My dad's a doctor." Eren had said, inviting her to his house to double check her injuries, and Mikasa agreed. She shivered again, looking back to the cabin with an unreadable expression.

"Where do I go?" She whispered, looking very small and frail and terrified, her pale skin almost ghostly in the moonlight, her shoulders shaking. "I don't-" He didn't have to ask what she'd lost that night.

"You can live with me." Eren had blurted, taking hold of his jacket sleeve, his fingers curling around her bony wrist. "My mom and dad, we'll take care of you."

"I shouldn't," Mikasa said, voice thick with tears.

Eren tugged off his scarf, throwing it around her neck and hair before taking her hand again. "Mikasa. Let's go home." She didn't put up a fight after that, only nodded and allowed Eren to lead her through the forest and back to his house. He promised her the entire way that she'd be okay, she would be fine and he'd take care of her, she wouldn't be hurt again. His mom had been horrified when he got home, but at the sight of Mikasa, of her bloody lip and bruised cheek and torn dress she'd softened, offering her a warm bath and bed after Eren's dad took a look at her. She'd lived with him ever since, becoming a member of his family, his best friend, someone he loved and protected just as fiercely as she did with him.

Mikasa reached the stage, her dark eyes locking onto his. He hadn't seen her cry since that night, but she looked close to tears again, her scarf pulled up over her mouth. He couldn't kill her, he couldn't fucking kill Mikasa! Not after everything they'd been through, not with everything she meant to him!

No, Eren thought, his hands curling again into fists. He wouldn't fucking kill Mikasa. Maybe someone else would, and maybe he'd be dead before he had to witness it. But he had his mom, he had Armin, he couldn't afford to die in these games. But she'd lost so much already, he'd given her another chance at a life, he couldn't take that away from her.

If it came down to it he wanted Mikasa to be the one to return home.

Mikasa took her place a few feet from him, on the opposite side of Petra. Petra introduced them as the newest tributes, saying something about how this would be the best Hunger Games yet, and then she told them to shake hands.

Eren held his hand out, taking Mikasa's quickly. He resisted the urge to pull her into his arms like he'd done countless times before, to tell her everything would be okay, even if he couldn't promise it. More than anything, he wished it wasn't Mikasa standing on the stage next to him.

They turned back to the crowd, and Eren watched in horror as the entire district kissed three fingers before saluting both Eren and Mikasa. He wanted to do it back.

A Peacekeeper took his shoulder, another doing the same to Mikasa, and they were ushered through the double doors behind them, Petra explaining that they had a few minutes to say goodbye to their families and loved ones. Eren eyed Mikasa, who walked with a faux confidence he may never be able to mimic. He was terrified at the idea of killing other people, of getting himself killed, and yet MIkasa looked as calm as could be, even after visiting time was done.

Once they reached the train, once they were introduced to their mentor, Levi, and Petra had left to speak to the conductor, they were alone for the first time. Mikasa stood from her chair and immediately sat with him in his, curling her legs over his lap as she ducked her face into his chest, her arms wrapping around his waist. He held her close, tears pooling in his eyes.

"Mikasa-"

"You're going to win," she whispered to his neck.

He pulled back, glancing at her sharply. "Don't fucking say that, Mikasa. You're getting out of this and you're going to go home. Don't pretend like you haven't been training, like you haven't been hunting with me."

She shook her head desperately. "You have your mom, and Armin needs the help with his grandfather."

"You can take care of my mom and Armin, Mikasa, you're not losing another life!"

Mikasa pushed her face back into his neck, her shoulders heaving beneath his fingers. "Why this?"

Eren swallowed thickly, dropping his head against hers. "I don't know. But you're going home."

"I don't want to talk about this anymore."

He nodded. They had a few days before the games truly began. He could think of a plan to get Mikasa home by then. "Okay," Eren said quietly, pressing a kiss to her temple.

Eren knew that by planning Mikasa's return he was digging his own grave, but he couldn't allow Mikasa to die in the arena. He wouldn't. But he knew Mikasa wouldn't let him die for her, either. He tightened his arms around her, watching as Panem's scenery blew by the train windows, the woods slowly growing sparse as they left the District. He could feel her tears begin to soak his shirt, his own dripping slowly into her hair.

She wouldn't allow him to die for her, but he wasn't going to let her die again. He saved her life once, and he'd be damned if he couldn't do it again.


	8. for alltid

**for alltid**

Eremika Week Day 5- Childhood; [ for alltid means forever in Norwegian ] Eren never imagined the new girl across the street would end up meaning so much to him, would become his best friend, become the reason he changed his life plans when her life was ruined by unimaginable tragedy.

**A/N:** This is one of my absolute favorite that I've published and I hope you like it!

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><p>nine<p>

Eren paused in racing his firetruck against the stone surrounding the fireplace when he heard a loud truck pulling up outside. He dropped the toy, running excitedly to the front window at the possibility of a firetruck outside his house. Instead, all he saw was a big, white truck parked in front of the house that had been empty for almost a year, tall men mulling about and taking couches and chairs from the depths of it.

"Oh," his mom appeared beside him, her hand smoothing through his hair. "It looks like the Ackermans are here."

"Who?" Eren asked, looking back to his abandoned toy. He wanted to drive it up the fireplace again.

"Our new neighbors." His mom took his hand, helping him down from the chair he'd stood on to see better. "Why don't we go say hi?"

"Mom," he whined.

His mom laughed quietly, leading him into the kitchen. "Don't give me that look, Eren. It will be good for you. They might have a kid, and they might be around your age. Maybe you can make a new friend."

"Only if they aren't dumb."

She shook her head, opening the door to the pantry to collect a few things. "Eren, that mentality will ruin you. You don't want only one friend forever, do you?"

Eren wrinkled his nose, leaning around his mom to swipe a few chocolate chips from the bag she put on the counter. "What's wrong with Armin, mom?"

"Nothing," she sighed, mixing a few ingredients together in a bowl. "He's a lovely boy, but would it really be so bad to have a few more friends?"

Eren laughed, nudging his mom's hip with his head. "You sound like dad."

His mom shook her head again, a small smile lifting her features. Eren watched as her mixture began to resemble cookie dough, but when he tried to get some on his finger while her back was turned she caught him right away. He climbed up onto the counter, swinging his legs idly against the dishwasher while his mom molded the dough into circles on the pan.

She handed him the spatula when the last batch was in the oven, and Eren sighed happily as he licked at it, watching his mom clean the bowl out. After the timer beeped, his mom started to pile the cookies onto a plastic plate. He reached for one, but she caught his wrist and broke one in half for them to share, instead.

"Mom, why can't I eat the cookies?" He complained, pouting towards the plate.

"They're for our neighbors," she explained, smoothing tin foil over the plate. "Now go put your shoes on."

Eren quickly pulled on his sneakers and a sweatshirt before darting back to the window, just in time to watch the big truck pull away and a man walk into the house before his mom called him from the front door. She held it open for him and he jogged out, reaching back for his mom's hand after she locked up, cookies balanced on her free hand. She led him across the street, taking care to remind him to look both ways before they crossed. Eren knocked on the door loudly, glancing between his mom and the house just before the door opened and a woman with dark hair and dark eyes and kind features opened the door.

"Hello?"

His mom smiled brightly, dropping his hand to reach out for the woman's. "I'm Carla Jaeger. We live right across the street and saw you move in and thought we'd welcome you to the neighborhood."

"Oh!" Mrs. Ackerman laughed, accepting the cookies from his mom. She called back into the house to her husband, who appeared beside her after a few long seconds. "Thank you so much," she said as Mr. Ackerman took his mom's hand. "Please come in."

Eren stepped hesitantly in front of his mother to enter the house, holding his hands behind his body and looking around the house. He'd only been here once, when he and Armin had accidentally thrown a tennis ball across the street and the old man living in the house had taken it. Eren and Armin had to persuade him to give it back, standing on the front porch and apologizing a million times to get it back. He'd seen a little into the house, then, but it looked a lot nicer with the Ackermans living there. Instead of a white sheet covering the couch and dusty paintings and dirty, scratched floors, the house was warm and colorful, with boxes littering the living room.

"This is my son, Eren."

"It's very nice to meet you, Eren." Mrs Ackerman said, smiling warmly at him. He smiled back, shifting uncomfortably when Mr. Ackerman held out his hand, but he took it just like his father had taught him, shaking once before letting his hand drop back to his side. "I know our-"

"Mama, do you know where-" A little girl came running down the staircase, her black hair flying behind her and the hem of her dress sliding against the steps she passed. She stopped on the bottom step, glancing between Eren and his mom and her own parents before ducking to her mom's side, standing a little behind the woman's hip. He couldn't see her entirely, but it looked like her hair and features matched her mother's.

Mrs. Ackerman kneeled down to the girl's level, placing her hands on the girl's small shoulders and smiling over at Eren. "Honey, these are some of our new neighbors. Carla and her son, Eren. This is our daughter, Mikasa."

Eren frowned as Mikasa greeted his mom, still hiding behind her mom. What kind of a name was Mikasa, anyway? But then again, she didn't exactly look like any of the girls from his school. Maybe she was from really far away.

"Hi, Eren."

He nodded, giving her a small smile. He really wanted to get home and get back to his toys. "Hi, Mikasa." The name felt strange rolling off of his tongue.

Mrs. Ackerman stood up. "Would you like to stay for dinner? We're ordering out, but we would love the company."

His mom nodded, putting her hand on top of his head. "That sounds lovely. My husband is working late at the hospital tonight and this will give Mikasa and Eren a good chance to get to know each other before she begins school. Eren, why don't you play with Mikasa outside?"

"Mom-" She gave him a look, one that told him he wasn't allowed to fight this, and he nodded in acceptance. Mikasa looked to her mom, but Mrs. Ackerman only shook her head and gestured to the front door.

Mikasa led him back outside the house, sitting down on the porch steps. Eren stood on the walkway, pointing to his house across the street.

"That's my house."

"Oh."

"Do you have any toys?"

Mikasa shook her head, playing idly with the zipper on her thin jacket. "They're still packed up."

"Oh."

Eren kicked at the grass when neither of them said anything else. He didn't know what to say to her, what did people even talk about with girls anyway? He'd only really spoken with Armin, but it was easy with him! Eren had known him for years! He could say the first word that popped into his head and it would entertain them for hours. Besides, girls had cooties.

"So where are you from?" Eren asked once the silence had stretched way longer than he liked.

"New York," she said, chin propped on her palm.

"Cool." Completely sure that there were no toys hiding in the bushes, Eren sat beside her on the step. "I've lived here forever. When do you come to school?"

"Mama said Monday."

"You can meet Armin."

"Who's Armin?"

Eren grinned, leaning back on his elbows. "My best friend. He's super smart and always does the best in class. He used to get beat up for it, but I stopped the bullies," he said proudly. "But he doesn't like _Star Wars_. Says it can't be real or something."

"That's weird."

"Whaddaya mean?"

Mikasa frowned, her tiny nose wrinkling. "_Star Wars_ is super cool."

Eren turned to her, confused. "You like _Star Wars_?"

"Yeah."

"Then you're cool." Eren said, catching her small smile as she turned away. He heard his mom calling from inside. "C'mon." He took her hand, leading her back into her house, grinning because _finally_ someone understood just how awesome _Star Wars_ was.

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><p>thirteen<p>

"Middle school sucks," Eren grumbled, throwing his arms behind his head as he led his friends home.

Armin snorted behind him. "You're only saying that because you hate your teachers."

"Well, duh. They're all annoying and don't make learning any fun." He turned to face Armin and Mikasa, walking backwards along the familiar path. "I can't wait to get to high school next year. It'll be so much cooler! Mikasa, are you gonna do any sports?"

She shrugged, pulling on the sleeves of her jacket. Spring was going to start soon, but winter was still holding on; they'd even gotten snow the weekend before, and Mikasa hated the cold. She'd said a few years back that it reminded her of some nightmares she'd had as a kid, where she was always cold and always alone. He and Armin had reassured her that would never happen, that it was only a dream, and though she'd smiled and thanked them, neither boy missed when she shivered and adjusted her jackets. "Probably."

"It'll be difficult to manage with all of the homework." Armin reminded them, tugging Eren out of the way of a fallen tree branch. They were nearing Eren's house and he could see both his parent's cars in the driveway.

Eren shrugged. "We'll manage."

He jogged up the path to his front door, throwing it open and leaving it that way for Armin and Mikasa. He yelled his arrival into the house, both his mom and dad calling back to him. Armin shut the door behind him and Mikasa while Eren chucked his backpack in front of the couch.

His mom poked her head out from the kitchen, greeting them warmly. She kissed Mikasa's forehead and ruffled Armin's hair, tugging Eren in for a hug even when he squirmed. "How was school today?"

"Lame," Eren answered for them, but he didn't miss the way Mikasa shook her head to let his mom know that wasn't how all of them felt. Eren grabbed his books from his pack as Mikasa settled on the couch next to him, her legs folded beneath her. Armin sat at the table, already working hard on what they'd been assigned for that night.

His mom laughed quietly. "Well, I'm making dinner. Armin, Mikasa, I'm assuming you're staying?"

"If you don't mind," Armin said, head bowed over his homework. His mom waved Armin's comment off, disappearing back into the kitchen while Eren got started on his homework, battling out the math, the same as Mikasa.

After a few hours, when Eren only had a bit more of his science homework to do, he felt Mikasa's head on his shoulder. He turned to face her, staring down at his homework, most likely figuring out the answers. He could feel his cheeks heat up as he tried to nudge her off, "C'mon, Mikasa, I can't write with you there." She complied, but only enough to rest her chin directly on his shoulder and he didn't have the heart to ask her to move again, especially when she murmured the last few answers. "Sweet, you're the best, Mika." She pulled away as he dropped his books back into his pack, but he saw the tiny flush of her cheeks.

"Perfect timing," his mom said from the kitchen, "Dinner's ready. Go wash up, yes Armin even you. Your extra studies will still be there after you eat."

Armin almost groaned as he put away his books and Eren laughed. Armin did his own studies so he could take more classes once he got to high school, even though it meant more homework and staying up really late, but Armin really loved it. Eren always saw the way his best friend's face lit up whenever he learned something new. Mikasa noticed as well, and even studied some extra things with him, helping to quiz him and stuff.

Eren's dad joined them at the table after he finished an after-work nap. His mom and dad asked about their classes and teachers, asked Armin how his grandfather was doing and if his parents had been back from England lately, asked Mikasa if her father liked his new promotion to detective on the police force.

"He does, thank you," Mikasa answered, hands folded in her lap since she'd finished.

Eren begged to be let off the hook for dishes that night, and his father agreed, but only since Mikasa and Armin were over. Over the sound of the water running, Eren and Mikasa smushed Armin between them and played _The Empire Strikes Back_. Armin complained about how impossible some things were, but Eren ignored him, quoting some of the best scenes with Mikasa.

"Armin," his dad called about halfway through the movie. "Your grandfather is in the driveway."

Armin stood, collecting his books from the dining room. "I'll see you guys at school Monday." He waved, disappearing from the house, his blond hair fanning out behind him.

"I should probably head home, too." Mikasa said quietly, staring out the window. Eren hadn't even noticed how dark it was outside.

"Yeah, okay. Bye."

"Eren," his dad laughed, rustling his newspaper at the table. "Why don't you walk Mikasa home?"

"Why?" Eren asked, frowning. "It's just across the street."

"Because it's the nice thing to do, and it's dark out. Now go."

Eren mumbled an agreement, pulling on his spring jacket and his old scarf while Mikasa double checked that she had all of her things. She buttoned her coat up all the way as they stepped outside, shivering a little.

"You okay?" Eren asked, reaching forward to take her bag for her.

Mikasa nodded, but she shivered again. "I still don't like the cold… or the dark," she said as they waited for a car to pass so they could cross the street.

Eren paused just before the walkway to her house, unwrapping the scarf from his neck. "Here," he said, throwing it around her own. "This'll help keep you warm." She stared at him in confusion, dark eyes almost shining in the moonlight. He was thankful for the dark in that moment because he was pretty sure he was blushing. "You remember what I said, right?" He asked as he took her sleeve, leading her up the walkway. "Those dreams don't mean anything. You won't be cold or lonely with me around. Me and Armin, we'll make sure of it."

Mikasa smiled, running her fingers along the fabric of the scarf as Eren held out her bag for her. "Thank you, Eren."

"'Course. See you Monday?" She nodded again, their fingers brushing as she took her bag and murmured out a "goodnight" before entering her house, the porch light switching off a moment later.

* * *

><p>fifteen<p>

"Hey, Kirschtein." Eren stopped in front of Jean's lunch table, placing his hands on the slick surface as he leaned across to grin at Jean.

Jean scowled. "What do you want, Jaeger?"

Eren cocked his head back to his own lunch table, where Armin and Mikasa were sitting with Sasha and Connie. Mikasa was talking to Annie, who was resting her hip against the table, arms crossed as they spoke. They'd had a bit of a rivalry since preseason started two months ago, but anyone could see the two girls were on the way to becoming good friends.

"Y'know your dumb crush on Mikasa?" Eren asked, watching as Jean's eyes nearly bugged out of his head.

Jean ran his fingers through his dumb hair, frantically looking to Marco for help. "I don't know what-"

Eren rolled his eyes. "You practically screamed that her hair was pretty in homeroom on the first day. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out." Then again, Mikasa hadn't mentioned the incident, or Jean, so maybe she hadn't noticed yet.

"Fine," Jean grumbled. "What the fuck is it to you?"

Eren grinned again, sitting down across from Jean. The two boys hadn't gotten off to a good start, in fact they'd both punched each other several times since school had started, but Eren honestly wouldn't mind if it stayed that way. "Well, I think she might like you, too."

"Really?"

"Yeah! Okay, but you don't really _look_ her type yet. C'mere." Eren stood, walking around the table and hoisting Jean from his seat. One plus of strength training for soccer; it really helped drag around people he didn't like. "First, fix your collar." Eren popped Jean's collar. "Tuck in your shirt and smooth down your hair." Jean complied, way too eager to impress Mikasa. "She _loves_ cheesy pick up lines. You know any?"

Jean shook his head but whipped out his phone and after a minute or two of scrolling, he smiled. "This'll impress Mikasa?"

"Definitely. Now go win her over!" Eren shoved Jean's back, pushing him towards Mikasa's table before taking his vacated seat next to Marco.

"Eren," Marco groaned.

"Sh. Hey man can you record this? I left my phone at my table." Eren asked, never looking away from Jean's slow gait towards Mikasa.

"No way."

Jean reached the other lunch table then, and he stood in front of Mikasa, one hand smoothing his hair again as he rocked back onto his heels. Mikasa paused in her conversation with Annie, the shorter girl eyeing Jean as Bertholdt came up behind her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Uh, hey, Mikasa." Jean began, his voice uncharacteristically quiet, so much so that Eren had to strain to hear him. "Are you a fruit-?"

"Jean-"

"-because Honeydew you know how fine you look right now?" The entire cafeteria was silent, staring in complete horror at the train wreck in the corner. Eren could barely contain his laughter, but he _needed_ to see if Mikasa reacted. He saw Annie roll her eyes, Bertholdt visibly cringed, and Reiner stared, bug-eyed, from his own lunch table while Armin glanced worriedly between Jean and Mikasa. "M-Mikasa, do you want to go-"

"No, Jean, I'm sorry." Mikasa tried to smile, her expression as controlled as ever. "I'm not looking to date anyone right now."

Jean nodded, spluttering out a bunch of apologies as he backed away. He turned around, and Eren flashed him a thumbs-up, no longer able to hold in his laughter. Jean blanched, horrified, before flipping Eren the finger and settling at a random table.

"Was that really necessary, Eren?" Marco asked once Eren had stopped laughing, more or less.

"Aw, come on man," Eren said, wiping a tear from his eye. "His crush was stupid and besides, he isn't good enough for Mikasa."

"And who is good enough for her?" Marco collected his things, piling his tray to be disposed of once the bell rang. "You?"

"Huh?" Eren frowned, turning back to face his table. Mikasa was shaking her head at something Annie said, looking uncomfortable as she glanced up to meet Eren's gaze. She frowned, mouthing _what was that? _Eren grinned, shrugging at her, though he knew there would probably be hell to pay later. "What are you talking about?"

"Never mind." Marco sighed, standing after the bell rang, throwing his trash away before jogging to follow Jean from the cafeteria.

Mikasa caught up to Eren just as he left the room, her fingers curling around the crook of his elbow to pull him to a stop, Armin right behind her. "Why."

Eren shrugged again. "You didn't notice his crush."

"Of course I noticed it, Eren. You didn't need to embarrass him in front of everyone."

"Oh come on," Eren rolled his eyes, shaking off her hold as they started for their next class. "It was funny."

"it was not funny!" Mikasa stomped her foot, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Why're you so angry? Jean's the one who got shut down."

"You're an idiot, Eren."

"What the hell, Mikasa?"

She sped up, turning around the corner faster than Eren and weaving through the throng of students. He jogged through them to catch up, but when he finally turned to the next hallway he saw her disappearing through the door to the girl's bathroom. Eren groaned, running a hand through his hair. He'd been making Mikasa angry more often, but he didn't understand why!

"You're both idiots, actually," Armin laughed, clapping his hand on Eren's shoulder as they walked.

Eren frowned, muttering something under his breath as they stopped at Armin's locker to collect their books. Eren pulled his Chem textbook out, holding it in both hands and studying the glossy plastic hardcover. "I don't get what's wrong with her. It was just a joke! She doesn't even like Jean, why should it bother her?"

Armin shut his locker, shaking his head. "It has nothing to do with how she feels about Jean, but it does have everything to do with how she feels about you."

"What?"

Sighing, Armin led him to their class. "Maybe you'll realize her, and your, feelings eventually." They settled into their usual seats, but Mikasa had moved across the room to sit between Connie and Sasha.

"Armin-"

"Okay, students!" Professor Hanji announced, grinning madly. "Let's get started with stoichiometry!"

* * *

><p>sixteen<p>

Eren perked up when he heard the door to the weight room slam shut, the noise echoing through the empty hallways. He was sitting on the ground, propped up against the trophy case and waiting for Mikasa to finish her practice. Armin was already home, most likely studying or preparing for his summer studying abroad. Eren's lacrosse practice had gotten out about twenty minutes before, so he'd waited for her like he did every other day. It was much more fun walking home with someone else.

"How was practice?" Eren asked once they'd started their walk to their block.

Mikasa shrugged, rubbing at her shoulder and grimacing. He saw her steps falter, noticed that she was walking a bit slower than usual. "Good. Petra worked us a lot harsher than usual, though, since we have about a week until our next game. How was yours?"

"Fine," Eren said slowly, frowning at the way Mikasa's lips twisted in displeasure. He stopped walking, shaking his head with an amused smile while Mikasa paused a few paces ahead.

"Eren-?"

"C'mere." He jogged ahead of her, throwing his own pack over her shoulders and ignoring her confused splutters. He bent in front of her, offering his back.

"You can't be serious," she said after a minute.

"Completely serious, Mikasa. You're hurt, or really sore, or something, and I bet you're exhausted from the SAT prep course you've been taking, too." Eren rolled his eyes, huffing slightly. "Just c'mon."

"It's five more blocks to our street!"

Eren sighed, looking over his shoulder to where Mikasa stood behind him. "Think of it as an extra workout, or something. You want to help me get stronger for the team, right?"

Mikasa nodded, and with a shake of her head she hooked her legs over his hips, her arms falling loosely around his neck. Eren stood, using a nearby tree to help steady his balance before looping his arms beneath Mikasa's thighs, shifting slightly until her thighs weren't digging into his stomach. Her chin fell against his shoulder as he began walking again, her temple bumping against his own, her warm breath tickling his cheek.

He cleared his throat, trying to ignore how much he really liked having Mikasa so close to him. "Are you overworking yourself in practice again?"

"No," Mikasa said, and a quick glance showed him her eyes were closed, lips turned up slightly. "Annie accidentally shoved me into the bench. What about you?" She asked after a minute. "Reiner isn't messing with you anymore, right? Because I'll-"

"I know, Mikasa," Eren laughed, deliberately nudging her head. "He hasn't forgotten the time you threw him onto the ground when he tackled me. Reiner's a friend. Jean on the other hand…"

Mikasa shifted slightly, resting her forehead against Eren's neck. "I thought you two got over that last year."

Eren grunted, choosing not to tell her about that day's practice, when he hit Jean with his own lacrosse stick when they passed each other on the field. He settled on a quiet, "kind of?"

"You two are hopeless."

Eren laughed, agreeing with her as he turned up her walkway. He paused at the door as she rummaged awkwardly through her bag for the key, and he bent down so she could reach the lock, all while she laughed breathlessly in his ear, sending chills racing down his spine that he really hoped Mikasa couldn't feel. He insisted on carrying her all the way up the stairs to her bedroom, despite her insistence that she could be let down at any time, and dropped her unceremoniously onto her bed. Mikasa rolled her eyes, but she was grinning as she tossed him his own pack.

"Are your parents coming home soon?" He asked after a minute while Mikasa gathered some clean clothes.

She shook her head. "Dad's working late tonight and mom's out with Carla."

"Oh yeah."

"I'm going to take a shower. Don't eat the entire fridge again," she said, throwing a wave over her shoulder as she disappeared from her bedroom.

"No promises!"

He sprawled himself out on her bed, his head nearly hanging off the end while he texted Armin about seeing the new Marvel movie this weekend. Armin tried to talk his way out of it, said he had to study for his AP Bio test, but Eren knew for a fact that Armin had been studying for like three days already, and after a few, (okay fifteen,) texts, Armin agreed to see the movie.

From: Bowl Cult

_ have you talked to Mikasa yet?_

Eren frowned. Why would he need to talk to Mikasa? They talked all the time!

To: Bowl Cult

_ about what? i'm with her rn_

Armin only took a minute to answer back.

From: Bowl Cult

_never mind. I'll leave that up to you_

Eren tossed his phone back onto Mikasa's bed when he heard the water in the bathroom cut off. Mikasa walked back into the room a minute later, tying the drawstring of her, or rather _his,_ football sweatpants. He grinned, still hanging off of her bed.

Mikasa eyed him, rolling her eyes before asking, "What?"

"So that's where they went."

A light blush spread quickly across her pretty features, but she ducked her head, tossing her dirty clothes into the hamper in the corner. "Carla lent them to me a few months ago. I guess I just never gave them back and-"

"It's okay," Eren interrupted, propping himself up on his elbows as she sat on the edge of the bed. "They look better on you anyway."

Mikasa smiled, pulling her scarf over her nose. Eren sat up, Armin's words from the past couple years floating through his mind. The way Mikasa never got rid of his scarf, how she always came to any of his tournaments, how he went to hers, the way they could quote the entire fourth _Star Wars_ movie together, (much to Armin and his mom's annoyance.)

"_It has nothing to do with how she feels about Jean, but it does have everything to do with how she feels about you."_

He'd noticed a few of his sweatshirts disappearing from his room, noticed the way Mikasa's hand would linger on his, how she seemed to lean against him even more while they watched movies together, how he always grabbed her hand to show her something or threw his arms around her shoulders. The way her hair seemed to shimmer and curl against her jaw when she ducked away adorably and _holy shit._ Was that what Armin had been hinting at?

"Mikasa," he blurted. She hummed, looking up from her AP Bio textbook. "Do you like me?"

Mikasa frowned, staring at him as if he'd just grown a third head. "Of course I like you, Eren, you're my best friend."

"No, no I mean…" Eren paused, glancing around her room as he searched for the right word. "I mean, like, like like me," he finished lamely. She looked away, breathing a "yes" so quietly into her scarf Eren feared he misheard her. He lurched forward, sitting behind her and gently tugging the book from her hands. "Really?"

"Yes," she repeated, pink staining her cheeks. "Eren," she murmured after he didn't say anything for a minute. "What brought this on? I thought you knew-"

"I didn't know." He said. "I didn't think you liked anyone." Grinning, Eren grasped her shoulders, pulling her to face him because _Mikasa liked him_, but before he could say anything else, she took his face in her palms, pressing their lips together softly.

She pulled back after a moment, but only enough to lean her forehead against his. "You staying for dinner tonight?" Mikasa asked.

"Yeah," he whispered back, dipping to kiss her nose. "Gotta meet the girlfriend's parents, and all." She whacked him with her notebook, but Eren thought it was totally worth it to see the smile splitting her features.

"Go take a shower, Eren. You're making my room smell."

* * *

><p>seventeen<p>

"That English final _sucked_." Eren grumbled, tossing his pack in the backseat of his car, narrowly missing Armin's leg. He slid into the driver's seat, starting the car and cranking the AC to dispel the hot air that currently clogged the car. Mikasa immediately began to fiddle with the dials on the radio until she found a station with a decent song, letting her hand hang out of the open window as Eren joined the long line of student cars trying to get out of the parking lot.

"At least it's over," Armin said, his chin tucked next to the headrest on Mikasa's seat.

"Yeah!" Eren quickly turned out of the lot, speeding just a little bit towards his and Mikasa's block. "And in three months we'll be seniors, then we'll graduate and get to see the world!" Eren was studying abroad during college. He didn't care how inconvenient it might be, or how impractical considering he didn't know any other languages, but he'd make it happen. He nudged Mikasa with his elbow as he drove, turning to face her properly at a red light. "Aren't you excited?"

"Of course. But I'm not excited about splitting up." She took his hand, lacing their fingers together on top of the console between them.

"It won't be for long," Eren said quietly. They'd had this argument before. "You'll go to NYU with Armin, and we'll see each other during every vacation."

Eren swore he could see her pouting. "Are you sure you don't want us to come with you?"

"Nah," Eren shook his head. "I don't want to distract from your studies." He leaned over once he was sure the street was empty and he was driving slowly enough, kissing her quickly. He didn't want to leave them either, but high school was almost over. Things were changing whether they wanted them to or not.

"As happy as I am that you two _finally_ got together last year," Armin said, placing his fingers on Eren's jaw to direct his gaze back to the street. "I'd appreciate it if your PDA didn't get us killed."

"Shut up," Eren laughed, turning into his driveway as Mikasa sighed next to him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said, curling her fingers around the edge of her scarf. "Annie wants to go to a movie tonight. She's coming to pick me up right now." Mikasa gathered her things from the floor of the car. "I'll see you guys in the morning?"

"Definitely," Eren said kissing her temple. She twisted her fingers into his hair, pulling him across the console for a proper kiss, tugging harshly on his hair when he smirked against her lips.

Armin groaned. "What did I just say?"

"Pretty sure kissing while parked _won't_ get us killed, Armin." Eren laughed once Mikasa pulled away, shutting the door behind her and jogging across the street to her house. "Unless you're really just jealous and want all of my kisses," he said, batting his eyes back at Armin.

Armin rolled his eyes, shoving Eren's face away when the brunet tried to land a kiss to his hair. "I am very, very okay with you not kissing me."

"Suit yourself." Eren grabbed his back pack, swinging himself from the car. "You coming over?"

"Well since I'm _already_ at your house."

"Shut up."

Later that night, after several snacks and half of Armin's favorite documentary, Eren's phone started to ring from the table across the room. He rolled his head onto Armin's shoulder, but Armin pushed him away, not even giving Eren a chance to ask him to get up and grab it. Walking quickly, Eren grabbed his phone, frowning at the screen.

Armin paused the TV. "Who is it?"

"Mikasa." He said, swiping his thumb across the screen. "Hello?"

"_Eren_," Mikasa gasped, sounding desperate, her voice thick. He heard her sob across the line and Eren felt a cold dread settle in his bones, freezing him to the spot.

"Mikasa," Eren repeated, clutching his phone in a clammy hand. "Mikasa, what's wrong? Where are you?"

He heard her choke back another sob, sniffing. "_They're gone, Eren, they're gone._"

"Who? Where are you?"

She didn't answer; but she was still crying quietly into the speaker. Was she still with Annie at the movie? Or had something happened to them on the way back? Armin rose from the couch, confusion spread across his features. Eren glanced at the screen of the phone when Mikasa didn't make any noise for a long moment. She was still on the line, but something about where she was had her distracted and very, very upset.

"Do you want me to call Carla?" Armin asked quietly.

Eren shook his head. "Mikasa, Mikasa can you hear me?"

"_Yes_," she moaned, voice breaking.

"Where are you?"

"_Police station_."

Eren whirled, racing to the front door to pull on his sneakers and grab his keys from the hook by the door. "Stay there. I'm coming to get you."

"_Eren_-"

"Everything's gonna be okay. Stay put, okay?" She didn't answer and after another few seconds, the line went dead. "Armin-"

"Go." Armin interrupted, pointing to the door. "I'll be here when you get back, and I'm calling your parents."

"Thank you." He yanked the door open, nearly sprinting to get to his car. Eren had never seen Mikasa cry, not even when she broke her arm the summer before their Sophomore year. But to hear her on the phone, in obvious distress, barely able to get words out through her tears… Eren could only picture the worst, and prayed to anything that he was wrong. The station wasn't far from his house, and before long Eren was pulling into the driveway, barely removing his keys before he was jogging to the front door. He launched himself at one of the desks of a rookie. The woman looked up in shock, startling a little before her eyes dulled in recognition. "I'm looking for-"

"Over there," she pointed to the lobby. He turned and after a quick scan of the room, he found her, sitting hunched against the wall, her fingers twisted into her hair and head bowed.

Eren didn't hear whatever the woman said next, he was already halfway to Mikasa. He dropped down next to her, easing her hands away from her hair and smoothing the knots she'd formed. Now that he was close enough, he could hear her crying, her broken moans and sniffles that broke his heart in more ways than he could imagine.

"Mikasa," he whispered, pulling her into his arms. Mikasa's head rolled against his shoulder and she seemed to realize, then, that he really was there. Her hand clutched his collar and she pulled herself closer to him, messily wiping her nose on his shirt. "What happened?" Eren asked after a minute, pushing the hair away from her face. "Mikasa, what-?"

"They're dead," she murmured against his neck, her voice hauntingly cold, almost empty.

"Who?"

She heaved a deep breath, shuddering in his arms. "Mama… papa… Eren, they're dead." Mikasa ducked her head again, but this time she did not cry. Eren didn't know if that was worse.

"They're…?" Mikasa's parents couldn't be… dead. He felt dread settle deep in his stomach. He may never get her mom and dad's teasing jokes when they found Eren and Mikasa asleep on the couch, or Mr. Ackerman's lessons to shoot a gun, or Mrs. Ackerman's light laughter when he helped her with dinner… but Mikasa- _fuck_, she would never curl up at her dad's side, or get to dance with her mom around the kitchen anymore, they wouldn't see her off to college, or be there at her wedding or see their grandkids or kiss her goodnight… _her parents were dead_.

"Nobody even saw it happen. They were propped against an alley wall, abandoned and bloody, shot three times each-"

"Stop, Mikasa-"

"Their murderer was there, too. Shot himself after shooting them. No money stolen or anything, he just killed my parents-"

"Mikasa-"

"Papa's supervisor is making the arrangements right now," she said to his neck. "They're trying to find any family I may have, but for now-"

Eren tightened his arms around her. "You know you always have a place to stay with me, right? Mikasa, if no one can… help you, you'll stay with us."

Mikasa nodded against him. He kissed the top of her head as he felt her tears fall against his skin again. Eren leaned his head against hers, watching as the officers around them spoke quietly. Mikasa's breath evened out, but Eren had a hunch she wouldn't be falling asleep that night.

"Let's," Eren paused, dragging in an unsteady breath. "Let's go home, okay?" She didn't acknowledge what he said, didn't say anything as he curled his arm beneath her legs to pull her up with him as he stood.

He helped her into the car, but Mikasa pushed his hands away when he tried to buckle her in, slumping against the seat and ducking her head again. Eren stalled outside of the car, calling his mom to let her know they were on their way before slipping into the driver's seat. Mikasa didn't say anything during the drive home; she stared out the window, placed her hand upon the glass, hunched her shoulders, but she did not speak or cry.

"Hey," Eren whispered once they'd gotten to his house. He didn't miss the way she tensed when looking back at her home. "Mikasa," he took her hand, trailing his thumb across her cheek. She didn't look up to him. "You're going to be okay. I promise." She nodded slowly.

She insisted on walking inside on her own, but Eren was close behind the entire time. His mom met them just inside the house, pulling Mikasa into a hug she did not return, whispering promises and regrets and remorse to Mikasa's hair. Eren's dad told her he would help with any of the arrangements, anything she needed. Mikasa thanked them quietly, giving Armin a weak smile, but shaking off the hand he placed on her shoulder.

Eren followed her to his bedroom, where she curled up onto his bed without another word. Eren sat beside her, running his fingers through her hair and after a moment she shifted, to rest her head in his lap. They did not sleep, and Mikasa did not cry, and Eren realized that night she was far too broken to do either.

* * *

><p>Eren didn't see Mikasa much immediately following her parent's deaths. Apparently, her dad's supervisor, Agent Pixis, had contacted her uncle, or something, and together they'd arranged for Mikasa to fly out to live with him for her senior year. Although she was staying with Eren until her flight in early July, she spent most of her time packing up her belongings, meeting with Pixis, making plans for her parent's funeral, their possessions and the house, or alone at the park a few blocks away. He'd tried to comfort her, to sit with her in the park, or help pack her things, but Mikasa always refused. And although she would come home with bloodshot eyes and fresh tear stains, she didn't let him see her cry after that first night.<p>

Eren drove her to the airport the morning of her flight, the day after her parent's small funeral, holding tight to her hand while she stared out the window, the bottom half of her face buried in her scarf. She didn't speak much these days, but she had nightmares again, and would wake him up in the middle of the night sometimes, folding his arms around her shaking body.

"So, uh, what's Levi do for a living?" Eren asked as they walked through the airport together, her carry on bag slung across his shoulders. His mom and dad had offered to ship her suitcases and boxes out to Levi, so she only had the one.

Mikasa shrugged, squeezing his hand gently. "I think Pixis said he works as an editor."

"Oh."

He followed her all the way to the gate, as far as he could before they would have to part. Mikasa handed the woman behind the counter her ticket. The woman nodded, smiling kindly, "We just started boarding. You can go through whenever you like, but boarding will close in about twenty minutes."

Mikasa thanked her quietly, and together they stood to the side as a few people walked through the gate to the plane. She turned to face him, reaching up to cup his face between her hands. "Eren… thank you for everything."

He swallowed thickly. "Mikasa. You remember what I told you, right?" He took her hands, pulling her close. "You'll never be alone."

"I know," Mikasa said. She kissed him slowly, pulling away to rest her head against his chest, right against his heart. He tucked his chin against her head, unwilling to let go. "I love you."

An final call to board the flight played over the loudspeaker, and with a sigh, Mikasa stepped back. Eren took her hands again. "I love you, too, Mika." She smiled; the first smile he'd seen since the incident. It was small and it was sad, but it was something. Eren shrugged off her bag, handing it to her. She hooked it over her shoulder, squeezing his hand again before turning to the gate. "Mikasa!" He called, just before she entered the gate. "Call me when you land, okay?"

She nodded, "I will, Eren." Her smile fell, and before he could blink, Mikasa hunched her shoulders and disappeared down the tunnel to the plane.

Eren stayed in the airport long after her plane took off, his palm pressed to the glass of a window. He'd known things were going to change that year, with their last year of school and graduation coming up, but he never imagined he'd lose Mikasa like this. Stuffing his hand in his pocket, Eren finally left, his heart pounding in both anticipation for her call, and complete dread at the thought of facing the upcoming year without her.

* * *

><p>"Have you spoken to Mikasa lately?" His mom asked as they folded laundry together in the family room.<p>

Eren shook his head, wrestling with a fitted sheet until his mom took the other end to help. "Not since school started."

His mom nodded, placing the sheet on the pile. "That's understandable, Eren. She just moved, and you said she's at a private school now? She's probably still adjusting to her new house and schedule."

"I know, mom," Eren murmured, folding an old t-shirt. "But I miss her."

"Why don't you call her tonight? Or right now?" He felt her hand on his shoulder, the on top of his head. "I know she misses you, too. Don't give me that look," she laughed, taking the shirt from his hands. He didn't recognize it, but after a minute he realized it was one of Mikasa's old band t-shirts. "If you keep putting it off because you're afraid she won't answer, you'll lose touch. Now go."

"Okay, okay," Eren grinned, kissing his mom's cheek as he passed her. "Hey, mom?" She hummed, looking up from a pair of his dad's slacks. "Last time we talked, Mikasa said that Levi was going to be observed by some social workers to see if he was a suitable guardian. If he doesn't pass, she'll be sent to live with her grandfather, or an orphanage if he can't take her. If that happens-"

"If that happens," his mom said, smiling softly. "You know I love Mikasa like a daughter. If it's what she wants and the courts allow it, she's more than welcome to come back."

"Thanks, mom."

He jogged to his room, laying down on his bed and quickly opening FaceTime on his phone to call Mikasa. Because of soccer and schoolwork, and Mikasa's new schedule, they hadn't gotten to talk a lot since she'd left, and Eren missed her like crazy. He'd called her a few times since school started, but the majority had gone to voicemail, and he always felt like shit when he woke up to her missed calls.

Just when he thought the call would end, Mikasa's face appeared on the screen. She was looking away from him, yelling something in Japanese, and he figured it was at something that Levi had said. "_Insufferable-_"

"Is he really that bad?" Eren interrupted.

"_No,_" she breathed. "_No, he's not terrible. It's a lot to get used to. Hang on, Eren._" The picture changed from her face to one of a hallway, empty save for a few dull pictures hanging on the walls. The screen shook, and he figured Mikasa was getting to her own room. He saw her pack fall to the floor, her shoes follow suit, and then she was back, sitting on her bed, back propped against the wall.

"Hi," Eren grinned.

"_Hi._"

"How's school been?" He asked, holding the phone above his face. He really wished she was there with him, curled up at his side, laughing with his mom or pestering him to do his homework; laying her head against his shoulder to kiss his neck and distract him.

Mikasa shrugged, the blurry picture shifting slightly as she moved. "_It's okay. Nothing like Trost, though._" She paused, her smile falling. "_How's the team?_"

"It's good. Jean doesn't suck as much as he usually does this year. The volleyball team's doing really well, but Annie misses you," Eren laughed quietly, sitting up to relieve his shoulders. "She won't admit it, but she does."

"_I miss you guys, too. School isn't the same without you and Armin,"_ Mikasa said.

"It's not the same without you, Mika." She pulled her scarf up over her nose, averting her eyes. "Hey, maybe I can come visit you over winter break." He said, grinning. His mom would totally agree! He could start saving up the cash now, and by the time February rolled around he'd be good to get to her.

Mikasa shook her head, her voice muffled through the fabric as she spoke, "_I'm nine hours away by plane, Eren. Plus, you need that money for traveling and college._"

"But I miss you," he said, well aware of the whiny undertone.

She smiled, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "_I miss you, too, Eren. But visiting… it just isn't in the cards right now. One false move and I'll be moving again._"

Frowning, Eren ran a hand through his hair, swallowing thickly and nodding. "I guess you're right. When's Levi's evaluation?" He asked, desperate to change the subject.

"_The first one was a month ago. He's been clean for a couple of years._" MIkasa said, slumping against the wall. "_The social workers are going to come back every few months. If he slips up, my grandfather will get called, and if he can't take me in I'll go to the local orphanage._" Her lips twisted bitterly, eyes narrowing as scenarios Eren could only imagine plagued her. Living in an orphanage for the last few months before her eighteenth birthday was a very real possibility for her, and it scared the shit out of Eren.

"That's not going to happen," Eren grumbled. She blinked, looking back to him in shock. "My mom said you can live with us if the judges allow it, and uh, if you want it."

Mikasa nodded. "_I'd like that a lot, but we'll see when the time comes, right?_" He heard Levi shout something from outside Mikasa's room, and she rolled her eyes. "_Eren, I have to-_"

"You're still planning on going to NYU with Armin, right?" Eren interrupted.

"_Yes, why?_"

"I'm applying I'm going, too."

"_But what about traveling?_" Mikasa asked urgently, pushing away from the wall and pulling her phone closer to her face.

"Doesn't matter," he insisted, shaking his head. "I can do that after graduation, or we can. Maybe we can even convince Armin to come too, I don't care. Going to NYU will mean I get to see you everyday, and that's worth more to me than traveling."

Mikasa worried her bottom lip, glancing away from the screen for a minute. "_Are you sure?_"

"Completely."

She laughed quietly, lips splitting into a genuine smile. "_I love you, Eren._"

"I love you, too." He said. "Call me when you can, okay?" Mikasa nodded, smile still in place when the call ended.

Eren knew his grades were good enough to get into NYU, and if he had to do community service or some shit to ensure his acceptance, he'd do it in a heartbeat to be able to see Mikasa all the time again. He could figure out the rest later.

He reached to the floor to grab his laptop, quickly going to NYU's page to figure out exactly what he had to do to get into the school and download the application. Eren would have to tell his parents eventually, and of course Armin, but that could wait until he finished applying.

* * *

><p>eighteen<p>

"Eren, Eren slow down!" Eren glanced over his shoulder, slowing his near sprint to allow Armin to catch up to him, turning in place to continue his search when Armin grabbed his shoulder, pulling him to a stop. "Eren-"

"Move in day was _yesterday_," Eren interrupted, rolling onto the balls of his feet. "She has to be here, and I need to find her." He started jogging across the lawn again, albeit slowly so Armin could keep up.

"When was the last time you actually talked to her?" Armin asked through heavy breaths.

"February," Eren admitted, scanning the campus for any sign of her. "Before her birthday."

Armin sighed, or at least, Eren thought he did, it was hard to distinguish from his constant panting. "You do realize there's a very good chance Levi lost custody of her, right? That she's off in France with her grandfather or in an orphanage. Plus, she's eighteen now. She can legally go wherever she wants, she might not be here."

"No." Eren growled, spinning when he thought he saw a flash of red fabric. Nope, just someone's outrageously colored hair. "She would have told me. Armin, she has to be here."

They circled the entire campus twice before Armin asked if Eren had tried calling her, shaking his head and calling him a moron when Eren said he hadn't. They stopped in the quad, leaning against a couple of trees and watching as the other students passed them by, their arms hooked together, laughter floating across the campus. Classes didn't actually start for a couple more days, and everyone was intent on taking advantage of that free time to discover everything the school had to offer- and hoard food from the cafeteria.

"Eren."

"Yeah?"

"Call her," Armin groaned, sitting down on the grass.

"Right." He pulled his phone from his pocket, dialing Mikasa's number quickly. He held it to his ear, re-dialing twice when she didn't answer the first time. "Straight to voicemail," Eren mumbled, leaning his head against the tree. She couldn't be in _France, _right? If she was, he may just drop college and use the funds to get to her, but then again, his parents might kill him for that.

"Eren-"

"Eren!"

He pushed himself away from the tree, recognizing the voice just as something collided with his side, sending them toppling onto the ground. Her arms wrapped tightly around him, her face pressed into his neck. Eren hugged her back immediately, pretty sure he was crying as he laughed loudly, dropping kisses against her hair, her ear, her cheek, anywhere he could reach because she was _here_, for the first time in over a year, he had Mikasa back in his arms, and he never wanted to let her go.

"Mikasa," he whispered to her hair, holding her close.

"I missed you," Mikasa said, brushing her lips across his neck.

Eren pulled back, cupping her face, and smoothing his thumbs across her cheeks to brush her tears away. She was so fucking beautiful. "I missed you." He wasn't sure who moved first, but soon her lips were on his, moving desperately as she curled her fingers into the fabric at his shoulder to pull herself closer. He tilted his head above hers, deepening the kiss, felling her lips pull into a smile against his.

He rested his forehead against hers once they broke the kiss, looking at her properly since she'd reached him. Mikasa's hair was longer than it had been last year, but her smile was still the same, his old scarf was still wrapped securely around her neck, her eyes shimmering still with unshed tears. Eren thought he'd be completely content staying in her arms forever.

"Mikasa…"

She kissed his nose, still smiling brightly.

Armin dropped down next to them, throwing his arms around both of their shoulders and squeezing harshly. Eren laughed again, ruffling Armin's hair as Mikasa turned to press a soft kiss to Armin's cheek.

"Hey, Armin." She said, wrapping her arm around his waist.

"It's really good to see you again, Mikasa," Armin said, nudging her head with his.

"You too," she murmured. "Nothing was the same without you guys."

"No," Armin agreed. "Nothing was."

"Where's your dorm?" Eren asked, threading his fingers with hers as they stood. She pulled his arm around her shoulders, staying as close as possible.

She hooked a thumb over her shoulder. "Hall A."

"We're in B." Eren said. They were close. Maybe if they were careful, they could finally spend the night together again. "C'mon, we'll help you unpack."

Armin led them back towards the dorms, Mikasa tightening her hold around his waist as they walked. She looked so much happier than she had during their last few Skype calls, and Eren imagined that he did as well.

"Eren," she stopped walking, allowing Armin to continue for a few seconds before continuing. "I love you."

He grinned, wrapping his other arm around her to hug her again. "I love you, Mikasa."

"Forever, right?" Mikasa whispered against his neck, repeating what he'd told her several times since they met. He nodded, dropping his forehead to rest against her head.

"Forever."


	9. I Do

**I Do**

Eremika Week Day 6- That Night; Mikasa had dreamed of this night since she was a child, since she fell in love with Eren and they promised to be with each other forever. The night they would be married after the fall of the Titans.

* * *

><p>Mikasa curled her fingers into the hem of her dress, smoothing out the wrinkles that had formed when she sat. The dress pooled around her, contrasting harshly against the muddy dirt and vibrant green of the grass. She let her fingers linger on her dress as she leaned her head back against the stone, breathing deeply.<p>

She'd looked forward to this night for months, since a few weeks before the final battle against the Titans. The night she would Marry Eren. It also happened to be the day the veterans and other survivors were being relocated to the beach, and Armin would soon fulfill his dream to see the ocean.

Mikasa still remembered when Eren had proposed.

They'd been lying together after a particularly exhausting expedition, Mikasa had been unharmed and Eren had finally finished healing, his face pressed to her shoulder and her arms wrapped around his back, her fingers kneading at the knots she felt. Almost asleep, Mikasa had been startled when he pulled back, hovering over her as he pressed kisses to her face.

_"Marry me."_ He whispered to her neck, his fingers threaded through her hair and his heart bared to her.

_"Eren-"_

_ "I mean it. When all of this is over, I want to marry you. I want to build a house on the beach near Armin and everyone else, and I want to give you the life you've always wanted." _He'd held her gaze during the entire speech, never once looking away as he promised Mikasa everything she'd dreamed of since the moment she met him.

_"Yes," _she'd breathed, placing a hand on his cheek. _"Yes, Eren, of course I'll marry you."_

They'd set the date for a few months after the estimated final battle, determined to marry if they were still in the walls, preparing to leave, or already gone, and the day had come before MIkasa could blink. The sun was setting behind her, bathing the courtyard in a beautiful orange and yellow light, casting long shadows in front of the stones surrounding her. Her fingers tightened against the fabric of her plain white dress, the one she and Sasha had made together a week before they set out to finally kill the Titans.

It was time.

Sasha emerged at the gate to the courtyard, a small, knowing smile on her lips. Her pack was slung across her chest, old Survey Corps cape secured snugly under her neck. "Hey," Sasha said quietly. She leaned against the gate, linking her hands in front of her. "It's time. Everyone's waiting by the entrance to the castle."

"I know," Mikasa murmured, her voice hoarse from crying earlier that day. It had been almost three months. "Can I have a few more minutes?"

"Of course." Sasha pushed away from the gate, throwing Mikasa one last look over her shoulder. "You look beautiful, Mikasa."

Mikasa nodded, waiting until she couldn't see Sasha anymore before she stood and brushed the dirt out of the folds of her dress. She faced the tombstone, bowing her head as a light breeze tugged at her hair, her shadow nearly obscuring the words on the stone. It was beginning to get dark and soon she wouldn't be able to make out his name.

_Eren Jaeger_

_ 835-854_

_ Incredible soldier, loyal friend, beloved savior_

"I miss you," Mikasa choked out, wiping angrily at her tears. She'd been here nearly every day since Eren had died in battle. Armin had insisted on a proper burial ground instead of a burning for those who had died in battle; no one had objected. When she visited, she told the stone all about Armin's preparations to move them out, of Historia's work to get the rest of humanity into the open world, Mikasa's precious memories of their time together. "We were meant to be married now." She turned her head up to the darkened sky, the sky she was supposed to marry Eren under, but instead it would be the sky under which she left him.

"I'll come back," she promised, bunching the skirt of her dress in one hand. "Tell you all about the ocean, all about how beautiful Armin looks standing next to it."

Mikasa placed her hand to the stone, stroking her thumb across his name, the crude carving of the letters dragging against her calloused hands. She couldn't leave Armin and the others waiting, they'd waited long enough to see the outside world. Even if none of it would be the same without Eren there.

"I love you, Eren." She bowed slowly, letting her hair curtain her face as more tears escaped her tired eyes. She turned away from the graveyard, wiping her fingers across her cheeks to dispel her tears as Mikasa grabbed her bag by the entrance, throwing her old cape over her dress and glancing back to the stone once more.

The night was young, and yet for her it was over. She walked across the field, to Armin and her surviving friends, a small, desperate smile on her features as Mikasa left her heart far behind her, buried deep in the ground with Eren.


	10. Hiraeth

**Hiraeth**

Eremika Week Day 7- Change; Something happened to Eren while kidnapped by Kenny, something horrific enough to force him to isolate himself from his friends, and Mikasa begins to worry that she'll never see Eren happy again. [ Heavy spoilers for chapter 62 ]

* * *

><p>"Jaeger. Eren. <em>Eren<em>." Jean leaned around Connie at the table when Eren still didn't answer, his gaze trained solely on his untouched meal. "Eren," Jean tried again, "dude I asked you to pass the salt like, six times."

"Oh." Eren murmured, the first word he'd spoken since the squad returned two nights before. "Sorry." Eren reached for the salt, sliding it across the table without another word.

Mikasa frowned as another silence settled over the group, everyone taking care not to look at Eren or Historia. Usually, Jean and Eren would argue or talk about _something_, Sasha and Connie chiming in at some points. Usually, despite the severity of their situation, a dinner with the squad felt almost normal. But not last night, and especially not tonight.

Tonight, Eren sat hunched in his chair, his hands held limply in his lap, expression blank and gaze turned inwards as he ignored everyone around him. Historia had been similarly distraught the night before, and she was just as silent as Eren, but Mikasa knew there was something else, something worse going on with Eren. He hadn't spoken to her or Armin since they reached him in Kenny's underground base, nothing more than to ask if they were okay, if he was dying, _why…_ but once they'd left the grounds he'd been completely silent, retiring to bed the minute they returned and staying there for almost two days.

And it scared her.

Mikasa slid her hand across the table and when he glanced at her it looked like he would respond, he would reach out and take her hand and hold onto her like they'd both done so many times, but he didn't. Mikasa felt Armin take her hand instead, his eyes somber, understanding.

The door slammed open, echoing throughout the room as Connie jumped in his seat. Levi paused in the doorway, his cloak soaked from the rain outside. He'd been in a meeting with Hanji all day, his only orders being to stay out of trouble. "Strategy meeting in the morning," he said quietly before he continued on, not even commenting on Sasha's messy eating.

Eren stood, collecting his dishes and walking to the kitchen before anyone else reacted to Levi, his footsteps gradually fading as he walked to the bedrooms. Mikasa pushed herself away from the table, her chair scraping harshly against the floor, too loud in the deathly room.

"Mikasa, wait," Armin said, tightening his fingers around hers.

"I need to-"

"I think Eren needs to be alone right now." Armin continued, lowering his voice as their friends began to clean up for the night. He stood from the table, holding her hand in both of his. "We don't know what he went through while under that chapel, but I think he needs to work through whatever it is."

Mikasa shook her head, glancing towards the stairs. "I think you're wrong." She whispered.

"Mikasa-"

"I don't want him to be alone," she snapped, taking her hand from his and tugging lightly on her scarf. "You're right, we don't know what happened, but whatever it is, it's made him isolate himself, Armin. I don't want him to be suffering alone."

Armin sighed, nodding slowly. He started to say something else, but Mikasa turned on her heel, missing whatever it was as she walked upstairs and down a familiar hall, to a door she'd visited far more times than the higher ups would probably like, to the room Eren shared with Connie, Jean, and Armin. She knocked lightly on the door, not expecting an answer, and when she didn't get one she pushed the door open, leaning heavily against it once inside, allowing her eyes to adjust to the dimness of the room.

Eren was in his bed, his back turned to the door and his blanket pulled nearly to his head. He was pretending to be asleep, trying to ward off any comments from his friends when they entered. Mikasa took a steadying breath, moving slowly to his bedside. She just wanted him back; she wanted the boy who gave loud speeches at poor times, the boy who'd protected her when their lives were all but lost, who was always laughing and fighting and so passionate about what he believed in no matter the circumstance.

Mikasa wanted the boy she so desperately loved back.

"Eren," she said, voice barely above a whisper. She touched his shoulder gently, but he jerked away from her touch as if stung. "Eren," she repeated, hoping the hurt she felt wasn't reflected in her tone. She wasn't losing him to himself. "Please, Eren-"

"Go away." He muttered into his pillow, his shoulders tense and a hand fisted on his mattress. It was the first time he'd refused her, but she didn't move; she wouldn't leave him with his thoughts, not when the outcome was something like this.

Instead, she sat on the foot of his bed, placing her hand on his leg, smoothing her thumb over the blanket. Mikasa didn't say anything, but she noticed that gradually his shoulders loosened, his head peeking out from the blanket as he cursed quietly, and after a few more minutes he sat up, slowly facing her. Mikasa swallowed thickly, pulling herself closer to him; he'd been crying. He let her cup his cheeks, run her fingers across his skin to wipe the streaks of tears away, but he did not look at her.

"I killed him." Eren finally said, his voice hoarse, broken, as he dropped his head. He clutched his blanket in his hands, his mouth twisting into an expression of disgust, of pure hatred.

Mikasa shook her head, reaching for his hand once again. He didn't shake her off. They hadn't lost anyone in the underground, Sasha was hurt and everyone was exhausted, sure, but they were alive. "You didn't-"

"Don't, Mikasa." His fingers were still lax beneath hers but he'd tensed again, his vibrant eyes focused on his lap. "You don't understand. You don't get it!" He shoved himself off of his bed, pushing his hands into his hair as he stood in the middle of the room, shoulders heaving.

Mikasa stood behind him, curling her fingers over his shoulder, but this time he did not relax. "Then tell me, Eren. Maybe I can help."

"You can't." Eren hissed. "I killed him, I fucking killed him! I spent five years cursing what he fucking did to me, how he left us, hoping he'd show up again to explain why the fuck I had this power, but he's been dead!" He stalked away from her until he stood on the opposite side of the room, his eyes wide and furious. She'd wanted something more than emptiness from him for the past two days, but not like this. "I thought I fucking hated him for abandoning us-!"

"Eren, you're not making any sense." But she had a sinking feeling she knew exactly who he was talking about.

"My dad. I fucking killed my dad when I was ten. When he gave me this ability. He made me into this, and I thought-I thought I could use it, could kill all of the Titans like I promised… and avoid becoming like them…" Eren glanced at her, desperate and terrified and altogether appalled as he slid down to the floor, folding his hands over the back of his head. "But I've always been like them-like those monsters…"

He'd accepted his ability and subsequent responsibilities long ago, and Mikasa had always known, (and told him, several times,) that he wasn't a monster. Even when the townspeople and government shouted the opposite at him, she and Armin and their friends spent countless nights convincing him he was still human, still good. Eren wasn't a mindless Titan, he was sentiment, he could choose to do the right thing, he wasn't a monster.

Mikasa dropped to her knees in front of Eren, gently working her fingers into his hair. "You're not a monster," she whispered.

"Yes," Eren said, voice barely audible even at their proximity. "I am. I killed my dad, and I didn't even remember. I'm no better than the rest of them."

"That's not true." She tugged lightly on his hair, lifting his head to catch his eyes. He looked empty, his eyes watery and alarmingly dull, and she felt her heart begin to break. She hadn't seen him like this since his mother's death. "You didn't know what you were doing-"

"Exactly."

"No, Eren, that's not what I meant."

"The first time I shifted I immediately killed my dad."

"That doesn't make you a-!"

"Stop," Eren whispered, taking her hands from his hair to hold them tightly between his own. "Please stop." He stood, pulling her up with him and then Eren's arms were around her, her head tucked under his chin as if he was comforting her, reassuring her that things would be okay. Her arms hung limply at her sides, her face pressed tightly into Eren's chest as he held her close. He dropped a kiss to her hair before pulling away, brushing past her to sit back down on his bed.

Mikasa heaved a deep breath, whirling to face him as he dragged his blanket into his lap. "Eren-"

"Don't."

His tone left no room for response and he dropped back onto his bed, throwing the blanket over his head. Mikasa felt her eyes pinch as she stared at the lump in the bed that was Eren, the boy who'd breathed a fighting resolve into her, who'd told her over and over again that life was worth living and she had to continue on. The boy she'd been with for years and years, who she loved irrevocably, who was broken and changed in a way she could never understand. She knew him, inside and out, but she couldn't reach him now, couldn't help him out of the hell he found himself in.

Mikasa stepped quietly to his bedside, slipping under the covers behind him without a second thought. He stiffened as she snuck her arms around his shoulder, taking his hand and linking their fingers, but he did not snap at her or send her away; he did not say anything even as his shoulders heaved and his tears soaked their skin and he brought their linked hands to his mouth to stifle his cries.

* * *

><p>Eren stayed very close to Hanji after the night Mikasa spent with him. He'd left early the next morning, choosing to find the Commander in the castle and stay with them for a couple of days. Levi had the rest of the squad relocate to the castle, resume their training and cleaning, and attend several meetings with Hanji, Erwin, and Zackley to prepare Historia for the throne, to make plans for reconquering Wall Maria, but Eren was never at any of the meetings. He stopped training with the squad, he either returned to his room extremely late or not at all, and he was barely at any meals. Instead, he was with Hanji or wandering the grounds alone, doing experiments or recounting his newest memories again.<p>

Mikasa had tried to talk to him again after their night together, but he'd refused her, refused both Mikasa and Armin. She spoke to Hanji once, but they told Mikasa that Eren hadn't mentioned anything after the first meeting the night they got him and Historia back. They let Mikasa know that Eren was still training, albeit alone, and that he'd thrown himself into as many experiments as possible to prepare for anything he'd need his ability for. Hanji also told her that he'd picked a room in a different wing of the castle and had been staying there most nights. Mikasa found his room easily one night, but she did not follow him in, not after the last thing he'd said to her.

"_You can't help me. No one can._"

When she saw Eren in the halls some nights, or when he left a meeting room right before the squad got there, he always looked distraught, his eyes hollow and puffy and skin sallow as he left as soon as possible. Mikasa had tried to join him once, but he'd told her to leave, not to follow him, and for the first time since they were children, Mikasa had let him go.

After training early one morning, Mikasa told Armin and Sasha to go back to the castle without her, that she'd be there soon for the next meeting. She lingered on the training grounds, debating whether she should try to talk to Eren again. She was desperately worried about him, but he didn't want to talk, didn't want to be near Mikasa or Armin or any of their friends. She wanted his safety and happiness more than anything, but after nearly two weeks of having him back, she was beginning to wonder if he'd ever return from his head.

Their next plan was about to be set in motion, Eren's abilities put to the test, and while he'd readily accepted whatever Hanji would ask of him, Mikasa was terrified that whatever he'd be made to do would only send him farther into his spiral.

She passed through the doorway of the castle, pausing when she heard a familiar voice echoing through the halls. Mikasa watched as Hanji and Eren walked through the opposite end of the hall, Eren's head bowed as Hanji spoke quietly about something, their hand placed tenderly on Eren's shoulder.

"Eren-" Mikasa called, unthinkingly, but she wanted to comfort him, to talk to him again, to hold him and help him get better.

He didn't looked up.


	11. I Like You Here

**I Like You Here**

Based off the au post, 'finding each other's names on a Coke bottle;' Eren and Mikasa spend a day together after Armin insists, a day that doesn't end how either of them ever imagined.

Word count: 5,411 [ M ]

**A/N:** I can totally explain the jump in rating I totaLLY CAN

* * *

><p>The plastic of the bottle chilled his fingers as Eren reached for one of the Cokes, eagerly spinning it around to see the name printed on the back while Armin took one of his own and shut the door to the store fridge. He hoped it wasn't one of the generic ones, like Soulmate or Best Friend, he needed a cool bottle to rival Ymir's find of her own fucking name.<p>

"What did you get?" Armin asked as they began to walk to the checkout counter.

"John." Eren said, rolling his eyes. "Sounds too much like Jean. I might need to burn it."

"Maybe you should share it with Jean," Armin suggested, laughing at Eren's disgusted look. "Don't switch it out for another one."

"Whatever." He wouldn't switch his bottle, that was no fun. Plus the only time he'd ever seen anyone put the bottle back had been when Reiner had been determined to find Annie's name, and had gone through almost thirty Cokes. They walked a bit slower, looking for a checkout that wasn't completely swamped with shoppers with carts piled way too high. With the holidays coming up soon, everyone was shopping for food and gifts, and the stores had been madhouses for the past few weeks. Finally, they stopped in the shortest line, but they were still behind a young couple with a babbling baby and an overflowing cart. "What name did you get?"

"Mikasa." Armin said slowly, as if testing the name on his tongue. He repeated it a few more times until it rolled almost naturally past his lips, turning his Coke to show Eren.

Eren scowled, brushing his finger across the small candies littering the check out. "What kind of a name is Mikasa?" He grumbled, (okay he was a bit peeved that Armin got a unique bottle when his was a boring _John_), as the line moved forward and he took Armin's Coke to pay for them. "It sounds like the spanish phrase for 'my house'."

"I applaud your originality."

"It's my name," a quiet voice said behind them, and Eren whirled to face a girl with pretty black hair and even prettier eyes, who looked about his age and was holding a bottle of her own. Maybe she had a bet with her friends, or she was just thirsty, or wanted to find the strangest name she could, or maybe she was giving him a concerned look because Eren realized his mouth was hanging open.

After the silence had stretched for a few more seconds, Eren leaned close to Armin, placing his hand at his mouth in an attempt to guard his next words. "So much prettier than a house." He must not have done a very good job, though, since the girl, _Mikasa_, blushed slightly and pointed to the cashier. Eren turned again, this time to see the cashier staring at him as she repeated his total for a third, (fourth?), time. He quickly fished a few bills from his pocket, but before he handed them to the cashier he hooked his thumb back towards Mikasa. "I'll pay for hers, too."

The cashier looked magnificently unimpressed, reaching for Mikasa's Coke. "You don't have to-" Mikasa began, but Eren insisted quietly, and she relented. Afterwards, they stood at the end of the conveyor, an awkward silence settling over the three of them and Eren should just walk away, but he was didn't-

"What name's on your bottle?"

Mikasa looked a bit startled at Eren's question, but she recovered quickly, glancing down at the bottle. "Erin," she said slowly, nearly making him jump. "It's not spelled how I imagined, though. I knew an Erin in high school, and she didn't spell it like this."

Armin leaned over, eyeing Mikasa's Coke before pulling back with a laugh. "Eren," he corrected. "A little different from Erin."

"Do you know an Eren?"

"I'm with him right now."

Mikasa looked over to him, surprise flashing in her eyes, or maybe that was the pale afternoon light painting a thousand jewels into her gaze. "Oh," she said quietly.

Armin reached for Eren's Coke, quickly replacing it with his own. "Okay, you two, go have fun." "Armin, what the fuck?" Eren asked, grabbing for his old bottle back, but Armin held it at bay.

"Yours says to share with 'Mikasa,' and yours," Armin turned to face Mikasa, pointing between the two of them eagerly. "Says to share with 'Eren,' so go share." He left without another word, flashing Eren a quick thumbs up before disappearing in the masses in the parking lot.

"Bastard," Eren muttered, training his eyes on the script printed before him.

It was Mikasa that broke the long, but not entirely awkward, silence. "Do you want to get coffee?" Eren held up his bottle weakly, and a small flush spread across her cheeks. They already had drinks. "Ah, right. How about the park then? Something tells me your friend won't let you back home until you spend time with me."

"No, he definitely wouldn't," Eren agreed as they left the store and began to make their way to a park a few blocks down. "Not that spending time with you would be terrible," he said, the words rushing when he realized that Mikasa could have been fucking offended by Armin forcing them together, but she laughed quietly, the sound inexplicably putting him at ease. It was too cold to stay out for long, but Eren figured they weren't going to spend hours in a park, enduring the frigid wind as they drank.

Turns out, that's almost exactly what they did.

Their drinks stood abandoned by the bench they sat on, unopened hours later as Eren turned to face Mikasa on the bench, her cheeks flushed a bright red from the wind and her hands completely swallowed by the sleeves of his jacket. (He'd insisted, she'd refused, but hadn't protested when he threw it over her shoulders.)

Eren propped his foot onto the bench, throwing his arm over it lazily. He was glad he'd worn a sweater. "You're not kidding?" He asked, snorting loudly when Mikasa shook her head.

"Nope. Annie got into a bar fight with Governor Reiss. She's kind of banned from that bar now, though."

"But the real question is, did he try to fight back?"

Mikasa laughed, the sound nearly taking his breath away. "He didn't have a chance. Annie's one of the strongest people I know, and when she's drunk she loses some inhibitions, and she knocked him out before he could blink. His daughter convinced him not to file a suit."

Eren made a face. "I didn't know Reiss had a daughter."

She shrugged, leaning forward to pluck a leaf from the ground. "Neither did we."

"Ah."

Mikasa picked lightly at the leaf as a silence settled over them, letting the little leaf bits drop into the wind to be carried away. They'd already been out here for hours, Eren couldn't even _feel_ his ass anymore, and he knew Armin would let him back into their apartment now, but he couldn't bring himself to leave, to excuse himself and part ways from Mikasa. He wanted to know more about her, to spend more time with her. He could just ask her to dinner, or something, but fuck, what if she had just been doing this to appease Eren's strange friend?

"So," Eren blurted, and her eyes flashed up to his. "You're from California originally, right?" Mikasa nodded. "Must have been really weird moving to New York."

"It was," she agreed, dropping the disfigured leaf. "I'm still not used to the cold," her smile was a bit sheepish as she lifted her hands, his jacket sleeves flopping against her wrists. "But I do love it. The colors are all beautiful, and my school is excellent, so it was worth the move. What about you?"

"I've lived here my entire life. My parents are actually only a few hours away, but Armin and I decided we wanted our own place when we started college." Okay, now Eren was really, really cold. For someone who said she hated the cold, Mikasa looked almost unperturbed by the stinging rain- wait, rain?

He held his hand out, and a few drops of icy rain struck his palm before the skies truly opened up and the rain began to fall in earnest, soaking the asphalt, and worse, them.

"Shit," Mikasa took the word right out of his mouth. She popped the hood of his jacket, bunching her hair beneath as the water dampened their clothing.

Eren took the forgotten Cokes into his hand before reaching out for her hand. She took it without question. "My apartment's a couple blocks away," he told her, surprised that he needed to shout over the sound of the thunder. "Where-?"

"Half hour walk," she interrupted, her nose twisting as stray drops dripped from her forehead.

He nodded, tugging on her hand gently to start them. "You can wait out the storm at my place." His hair was starting to stick to his forehead and fall messily into his eyes, but with one hand full of soda and the other holding tight to Mikasa's, he wasn't able to brush it away. At least he knew the way home by heart.

"Eren, you really don't have to-"

"I'm not going to make you walk home in the damn rain, Mikasa." He glanced over his shoulder to see her nose scrunched up again, the small droplets racing down her cheeks, and she nodded as she matched his stride and then encouraged him into a run, still holding tight to his hand as she completely outran him.

She held the drinks for him as he fumbled at the door, looking for his keys. He was thankful for the tiny awning over the front step because they may not have been shielded from the wind, but at least the rain wasn't drenching them at full force anymore. Finally, Eren remembered he kept his keys in his jacket pocket, and he turned to her, her hair matted against her face and her nose nearly burrowed into the collar of the jacket. He mumbled about needing his keys before reaching into the breast pocket, noticing the way Mikasa kept very, very still even after he pulled away.

He let Mikasa in first as soon as the door was unlocked, a sudden fear nearly making him drop his keys. He barely knew her and he'd just dragged Mikasa to his home! Her roommates could be worried sick, fuck she could think he was a murderer- maybe _she _was a murderer! Armin told him he never thought things through, but letting her get sick walking home? Yeah, right.

Looking up, he saw her standing a bit uncertainly in the hall, raising the bottles with a small smile. "Right," Eren said, pushing the thoughts from his mind. "Here," he took the Cokes, putting them onto a counter and reached for her jacket before stopping himself. "I'll get you a change of clothes if you want to go dry off in the bathroom."

"Okay." He pointed her down a different, shorter hallway, her socks squishing against the hardwood. Eren dug through his clothes for a few minutes, grateful that Armin had recently convinced him to do his laundry, bunching up a pair of sweatpants and his old soccer sweatshirt before changing into something else himself. He knocked quietly on the bathroom door, passing Mikasa the clothes once she'd cracked open the door.

"They might be a little big," Eren admitted.

"It's fine, thank you Eren."

Eren got to work lighting the fireplace beneath the TV, just producing a spark when his phone beeped with a voicemail. He frowned, listening to it as he poked at the small flame. It was a delayed message from Armin, letting Eren know that he was hanging out with Jean, Marco, and Sasha that night, and wasn't sure when he'd be back. Well, that took away Armin's wisecracks if the blond found Mikasa over at their apartment. Eren continued to tend to the blooming fire until a proper flame was licking away at the wood before placing the screen in front of it, wiping his dirty hands on his jeans when he saw Mikasa round the corner into the living room, running a towel through her hair. She'd rolled the sweatpants a few times, the cuffs still dragging across the floor, but the sweatshirt fit her well enough.

She held the towel away from her head slightly. "Where-?"

"Uh, on the chair's fine." She dropped it onto one of the barstools before taking a seat on the couch, curling her legs beneath her as Eren hastily played whatever movie was still in the DVD player. He could still hear the thunder and the rain pouring outside, rattling the windows with no sign of stopping. Mikasa leaned her head against the back of the couch, her cheeks still a bit flushed from all of their time in the cold. "Do you want anything to drink?"

"I'm kind of hungry," she said after a minute, glancing over at him and Eren realized that he'd hijacked her for most of the day, they'd been together for _hours_ and he hadn't once thought that she needed to eat.

"Right, fuck, sorry," Eren jogged into the small kitchen, trying to find something to make or re-heat for Mikasa.

She followed him to the doorway. "It's okay, Eren. I can always wait until I get home, or we can order something."

Order, that's right, he and Armin had ordered out last night. "Actually," he trailed off, digging through the fridge. When the fuck had Armin bought fifteen cupcakes? Eren found what he was looking for, dragging the take-out boxes from the fridge. "Leftover Chinese sound okay?"

"Perfect," Mikasa laughed, helping him to spoon everything out onto two plates, grabbing their forgotten cokes for their drinks.

They relocated back to the couch, sitting pretty close in order to pick off of each other's plates. The previews for the movie were just about to end, the music swelling around them as the screen faded from black. Mikasa eyed a piece of chicken and he laughed quietly. "Ah, Armin really likes spicy things," he explained, picking a piece of beef from her plate. "Sorry-"

"It's okay," she bit into the chicken, barely batting an eye at what made Eren need to down half a glass of water.

"You're crazy."

"I'm sure I'll find a rebuttal for that eventually." She turned to the TV, guarding her plate from him when he tried to take more of her Lo Mein and ignoring his indignant cry and subsequent pout. She was good; even Jean gave up on him when he pouted. "_Phantom Menace_?" Mikasa asked around a mouthful of chicken, arching her eyebrows.

"If you don't like it, I can put something else on," he offered, unsure whether to feel offended yet. He knew the prequels weren't as popular as the originals, Jean had told him several times he was fucked up for liking _Phantom Menace_ the most, but he'd change it for her. Probably.

Mikasa shook her head, finally relenting her plate to his fork, her lips curling slightly at his triumphant shout. "It's one of my favorites."

Eren nearly choked on his food. "Really? Mine too!"

About halfway through the movie, Eren learned that she wasn't joking about liking it. She quoted as many lines as he did, but she did whack the back of his head when he got too into some scenes and cursed off the characters. He was too distracted by a fight scene to notice Mikasa picking away at the last of his not spicy chicken, popping the last piece into her mouth with a tiny smirk when he finally saw her. He rolled his eyes, reaching for her plate but she stopped him, offering to take them to the kitchen herself.

"Hey, Mikasa," Eren began when she re-entered the room, dragging his eyes away from the screen to ask if she wanted anything else, and the rain wasn't falling as hard against the house anymore, so he figured it would be safe to order or… catch a bus if she wanted to, but the sesame seeds and drop of sauce on her cheek distracted him, and he spoke without thinking. "C'mere."

She gave him a look, but complied, crouching down before him on the couch. He sat forward, dragging his thumb along her cheekbone, tracing over her bottom lip, and then down to her jaw, cradling it gently, her fair skin surprisingly warm against his fingers. He looked up slowly, his movements almost muddled as he caught her curious gaze, the trademark _Star Wars_ theme playing behind them, something warm curling into his chest.

"Mikasa…" Her breathing faltered, eyes boring into his as she leaned into his touch. The firelight cast a strange glow around them, he should really put it out lest Armin scold him for wasting wood, the color disappearing from her dark eyes in the shadow of the light, his thumb so close to her lip again, his face a breath away from hers.

Mikasa closed the distance between them, pressing her lips to his gently, as if nervous for how he'd react. Her mouth moved slowly against his, her eyes watching for any reaction, pulling away when he froze, too stunned to respond.

"I'm sorry," she breathed, sending shivers down his spine. "I'm sorry, I should go-"

Eren slid his hands up to properly cup her face, pulling her mouth back to his and swallowing her tiny noise of surprise as he tugged her closer. She was stiff for a moment, a tiny wave of panic washing over him and he nearly pulled away until he felt her relax into his hold, her fingers curling into the front of his shirt as she kissed him back. He ran his tongue over the seam of her lips and she parted them with a little gasp that did funny things to Eren's chest as he traced her tongue with his, grinning into the kiss.

They didn't stay that way for long, though, as Mikasa broke the kiss to trace her lips across his jaw and down his throat, forcing a strangled groan as she pushed herself into his lap, settling her legs on either side of him, the weight of her hips against his taking his breath away, as she worked to remove his shirt. Mikasa dropped it somewhere on the floor, and then her mouth was back on his, biting, sucking and nipping as she ran her fingers over his chest, scorching him with her touch.

"Fuck," he gasped, breaking away from her as she dug her nails into his sides. Eren nearly cursed himself for lending her a sweatshirt, a normal tee would have been _fine_ and a lot fucking easier to pull off, but finally he got Mikasa's head through, her hair brushing his skin as she took the opportunity to litter his chest with kisses.

Eren dropped his hands to her thighs, running his hands down to her calves and hooking them more securely around his waist before twisting to press her back into the couch, draping himself over her. It was a bit awkward on the cramped couch; he had to prop one arm against the back of it and he'd accidentally pushed his leg directly against her arousal, but any thoughts of discomfort disappeared at her drawn-out moan.

"Eren," he felt Mikasa's hands at the waistband of his jeans, her fingers fumbling with the button. He grinned into the crook of her neck, pressing soft kisses to the underside of her jaw, and Mikasa seemed to forget all about his pants as her hands reached up to grip his hair, tugging slightly when he bit at her collarbone.

Mikasa used her hold on his hair to direct his mouth down to her chest. He ran his hands over her sides and up her back, feeling delighted at the way she shivered against him, until he reached the clasp of her bra, quickly tugging it off and letting it fall to join the growing pile of clothes on his floor before running his tongue between her breasts, rolling a nipple between his teeth and Mikasa arched against him, his name escaping her lips in breathy pants. He continued, taking care to kiss and nip at every part of her exposed skin, spending extra time exploring the dips of her impressively toned stomach. Her other hand moved from where it grasped his arm to cup his neck, holding him tightly as he bit at her hip.

She cursed quietly so Eren did it again, running his tongue over the spot before mouthing at it, hard enough to have her arching against him again, Mikasa's nails dragging down his neck and eliciting a noise from him, not quite a moan, but _definitely not a purr_, that even he was surprised to hear.

Mikasa laughed sharply, her hands dropping to cover her mouth as Eren pulled away with a roll of his eyes. She was lucky her laugh was one of the most beautiful things he'd ever heard. "I'm sorry," she gasped around giggles. "I-" Eren sat back, watching her fight for composure for a few minutes before her breathing calmed, and she reached for his hands. "It was cute."

"Shut up," Eren groaned, fighting a smile as he dipped his mouth back to hers, feeling her grin against his lips. He'd let go of her hands in order to hold himself above her, and he trailed one hand down her stomach before dropping his fingers below the waistband of her sweatpants. She broke the kiss with a loud gasp, throwing her head back as he stroked her through her underwear.

He could feel himself straining against his jeans, desperate to finally be joined with her, but he'd be damned if he wasn't sure she was prepared. Still, Eren found himself rolling his hips against her leg as he nudged her underwear aside to press his finger into her, her nails raking down his back in response, the sharp pain thrilling him.

"Eren-" Mikasa moaned loudly as he pushed another finger into her, the dying fire reflecting flecks of gold and red into her dark eyes. He worked a third finger inter her, his own need rising as he dropped his mouth to her neck again, tracing his lips across her jaw as he slowed his fingers, earning a high-pitched whine from Mikasa. Eren ran his tongue over the shell of her ear and to the skin behind it, biting harshly- and Mikasa cried out, grinding against his hand as if in a frenzy.

He pulled back, smirking broadly at the way her cheeks flushed a bright red. She tried to tuck her face against the couch cushions, but Eren still had his fingers curled into her, his arm caging her in. Finally, Mikasa spoke. "Oh shut up, you purred like a damn cat when I touched your neck."

"It was cute," Eren echoed, laughing quietly.

"Just-" Mikasa huffed, circling her hips to try and make him move again. Her fingers dropped to his pants again, finally snapping the button open and running her fingers along his length. "Just take your pants off."

He did, working with Mikasa to _finally_ slip his jeans and boxers off, and then he pulled her sweats and soaked underwear down, moving his fingers inside her again. Eren lined his hips up to hers, but her hand on his wrist stopped him.

"Wait, Eren-"

"Fuck, I'm sorry." She'd changed her mind. _Fuck_, she hadn't wanted this at all- "I'll-"

Mikasa rolled her eyes; she must have noticed his change in demeanor immediately. "Condom."

"What?"

"Do you have a condom?"

"Holy shit." Mikasa laughed, pressing a quick kiss to his lips. "Yeah, fuck, yeah let me go get one." He was such an idiot. He nearly ran to his bedroom to dig through his dresser drawers, shoving his clothes to the side; he had to have some- ah. He grabbed one from the box, not even bothering to shut the drawer on his way out. Mikasa glanced over the back of the couch at his triumphant holler, a smile tilting her lips. "Okay," he held the foil between two fingers, "got it."

Mikasa grabbed it. "I see that." She ripped it open, her movements hurried as she rolled it over his arousal, her fingers moving lightly over him. She threw her arms around his shoulders after, tugging his mouth back to hers and pulling him back down to the couch, where he rested his arms on either side of her head. "Ready?" He asked quietly, sweeping his thumb across her lip.

She nodded, tilting her hips up to meet his as he pushed into her, muffling his groan on her neck as she tugged lightly on his hair, shifting as if in discomfort. Eren held very still, his mind in a haze of heat and nails and _Mikasa_, carding a hand through her hair, pressing his lips to her throat again and again until Mikasa rolled her hips against his, murmuring, "move," against his hair.

He did, rocking into her with near frantic movements, her nails digging into his biceps as she matched his thrusts, his name falling from her lips quietly. She hooked her legs around him, urging him deeper, nearly undoing him as she dug her ankles into the small of his back. Eren kissed her again, taking advantage of her groan to deepen the kiss, run his tongue along her teeth, and bite harshly against her lower lip, earning another little moan.

"Shit," he whispered against her slick skin, his hands bunching in the cushion. He shifted slightly, raising one of her legs higher on his waist, a shudder wracking through her body as he dug his finger into her thigh, keeping her as close as possible.

"_Eren-_"

He pulled back slightly to press quick kisses to her cheeks, her forehead, down her jaw to her collarbones. Mikasa's hands back in his hair, she yanked when he hit a particular spot within her, a high-pitched moan escaping her. "You're so beautiful," he murmured to her collarbone. The fire had died, leaving them shrouded only in the pale golden sunset bleeding in from his windows, the colors illuminating her skin, highlighting the marks he'd littered along her neck and chest, dancing through her heavy gaze. "Perfect…"

Mikasa pulled his head from her chest, eyes wide and lips parted in shock. "Eren-" He didn't give her a chance to voice her concerns, instead he covered her mouth with his and ran his hand down her front to where they were joined, finding her clit after only a minute, pressing against it, pulling and twisting as she threw her head back. "Eren… I'm-"

"That's it," Eren said, surprised by the hoarseness of his own voice, as he quickened his fingers against her, holding her gaze. "That's it, Mikasa, come for me…"

Mikasa's fingers stung against his neck as she came with a loud cry, her face twisted in ecstasy, her legs shaking around his waist as he moved inside of her still, grinding his hips against hers as she urged him along. Her lips were slack beneath his as he muffled his groan against her mouth, his orgasm wracking through him after a few more shallow thrusts, Mikasa's quiet encouragements against his cheek almost lost to him.

Her arms tightened around his shoulders when Eren tried to move after they'd both stilled, breathing still heavy, but he managed to prop himself on an elbow to run his fingers through her hair and push it away from her face. She glanced up at him, almost shy in the way her lips twisted into a smile. Eren grinned back, perfectly content with staying trapped in her arms, and she laughed quietly.

"I've never done that before," she said, trailing her fingers across his jaw.

"Come so loudly?"

She rolled her eyes. "No. Sleep with a stranger." Eren shrugged, pressing a kiss to the inside of her wrist, when her expression twisted and she thumped her fist against his shoulder blade; _hard_.

He grunted, sitting up with a scowl as Mikasa pushed herself away from him, standing before the couch shakily, one hand in her hair. "Shit, you could have told me earlier you were into that-"

Mikasa interrupted him. "We just slept together."

"Yeah," Eren agreed. He thought that was pretty obvious. Working to remove the condom with a grimace, Eren stood, feeling suddenly very cold without Mikasa's body so close to his. He tossed the condom into the bathroom garbage, grinning slightly at the unruly mess Mikasa had made of his hair.

"We just _slept_ together!" Mikasa repeated, raising her voice to carry through the apartment. "You're a stranger!" She continued once he re-entered the room. "This was a mistake." She was still standing in front of the couch, but now she was wearing his long sleeve tee, the hem barely covering her as she touched her neck gently. She looked about ready to start pacing, or scream, or grab her clothes and get the hell away from him. Eren swallowed thickly, reaching for his jeans. She ran a hand over her neck, lips twisting into a little scowl. "Jeez, how many…"

"Hey," Eren said quietly, taking her hands. He laced their fingers together, noticing the way she fidgeted where she stood. "It's okay, we used protection and everything, you don't have to worry about anything. Your clothes should be dry by now, and I don't think it's raining anymore. I can give you change for a bus-"

"I should go, huh?" She whispered, her eyes glued to the floor.

"If it's what you want."

Her hands squeezed his, her head snapping up. "What?"

"Well," Eren said, very slowly. He lifted her hands in his, pressing kisses to each of her knuckles between words. "If you stay the night, and I take you out to lunch tomorrow, then are you still a stranger?"

"I guess not…"

"I'll let you choose what we watch for the night." He kissed the back of her wrist, then dipped his head to press a kiss to the mark sticking out above his shirt, cupping her jaw gently. "What do you say, Mikasa? Can I take you out on a proper date in the morning?"

"Okay," Mikasa breathed after a short silence, leaning into his touch. "Okay. But I don't have a change of clothes."

"I can lend you something," Eren grinned, kissing her quickly. "Not like I haven't done it before."

Mikasa rolled her eyes, reaching for his sweatpants as she settled herself back on the couch. "What's Armin going to say when he sees me here?"

Eren really hadn't thought that one through. God, Armin would be so smug. The bastard. He found his phone on the floor, checking it quickly after tossing Mikasa the remote. A few messages from his mom, a picture from Sasha of Jean absolutely wasted that Eren totally didn't save for blackmail, and one from Armin. "Ah, he's working on a final project for school… but he'll be home by midnight." Mikasa groaned, balancing her chin on her hand as she surfed the channels. "We can just hide out in my room until he leaves for work in the morning." He dialed the local pizza place's number.

"You'll have to tell him eventually."

Eren flipped his phone shut after ordering, raising an eyebrow at Mikasa. "Eventually," he repeated.

She flushed prettily. "I just meant- If anything comes of this, you'll have to tell him."

He laughed, pulling the sweatshirt she'd worn earlier over his head before joining her on the couch, wrapping an arm around her as she leaned against his chest. "I will," he promised, dropping a kiss to the top of her hair. He couldn't wait for lunch tomorrow. Eren eyed the TV, tucking his chin against her head. "Cartoons?"

Mikasa tipped her head to meet his gaze. "I'm not changing it."

"I don't want you to." Eren said, squeezing her gently as she laced their fingers together. "Want me to light another fire?"

She shook her head, nudging him lightly until his back hit the couch, her cheek resting against his heart. "I like you here."

"I like you here, too."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Okay, so since most of my fics are T or K, for now on, any post that has suggestive themes or full on sex will have [ M ] in the summary, so you can skip it if it makes you uncomfortable!


	12. As Long As I Have You

**As Long As I Have You**

Raising a baby in the middle of a brutal war against the Titans is hard. It's even harder when you're alone. "Daddy, what was mama like?"

Word Count: 8,275

* * *

><p>"Do you have the bottle?"<p>

"Yes, Mikasa-"

"The extra diapers?"

"Yes, Mikasa-"

"She'll need a bath tonight after her dinner, make sure you-"

"Mikasa," Erwin interrupted, adjusting the baby in his arm, Keiko's head resting gently on his chest. "Keiko will be fine. You have nothing to worry about."

Mikasa nodded, unconvinced as her fingers tightened around Eren's wrist. It had been nearly six months since Keiko was born, but Mikasa had yet to return to the field, taking time instead to stay with their daughter as the Corps got closer and closer to sealing Wall Maria. The expedition beginning today was to be the one where they finally reclaimed the wall, and as Levi said, they needed every "shit faced brat with experience" on the field, and that meant Mikasa.

Even if it meant leaving their baby girl alone for the first time.

Eren had gone on expeditions since their daughter was born, (mostly at Mikasa's insistence,) but both of them had never been away from her at the same time. He was just as worried about Keiko as Mikasa was, but he trusted his abilities, and he trusted her, and everyone on the expedition. They'd come back, and Keiko would be fine.

"It's just four days," Erwin was saying. "I'll take good care of her."

"I know," Mikasa sighed, dropping Eren's wrist to place the baby bag on the floor by Erwin's feet. She pressed her fingers to her forehead. "I know. I'm just worried."

Erwin smiled gently. "With good reason, Mikasa. But I give you my word, Keiko will be well taken care of."

Mikasa took Eren's hand, threading their fingers as she nodded again, throat working, and Eren knew her to be thinking of a way to disobey Levi and stay, but the plans had already been made and it was her squad that had the biggest burden of the trip. Without her there, they would have no chance of succeeding.

"Captain Ackerman, Squad Leader Jaeger." A quiet voice from behind reminded them that the Corps was waiting. Eren turned to face the new recruit, a young girl with a shaking hand pressed to her chest in a salute, her eyes betraying even more of her fear. "The Commander requests you take your positions."

"Tell Hanji we'll be right there," Eren said, turning away from her bewildered look. "Mikasa, we need to go."

"Yes." Mikasa leaned forward, pressing her hand to Keiko's bare head and her lips to Keiko's cheek, lingering for as long as she could. Eren stepped closer, kissing the top of Keiko's head as the young girl stared down at them, her head tilting slightly. "Eren-"

"See you in four days, Erwin." Eren tugged on Mikasa's arm, leading her away to where the horses were lined up, to where the rest of the Corps was stationed. He took her directly to her horse, slightly behind Hanji's and directly next to Levi's, her squad fanning out behind her, but Mikasa did not mount her horse and she did not look at him, her eyes trained back to the front of the castle, where Erwin still stood with Keiko. "Hey," Eren said carefully, taking her face in his hands, forcing her to look away from their daughter. "Four days," he said again. "Four days, Mikasa, and we'll be back with her. You don't have to worry."

"But what if something happens?"

Eren paused, running his thumb over the lingering scar high on her cheek. He didn't have an answer for her; there was no way to guarantee that they would even return in a few days, that they would survive the mission to see Keiko again, but they couldn't focus on that. If they spent the entire mission agonizing over the chance of death, they wouldn't have a chance to survive. Resting his forehead on hers, Eren whispered, "don't think about it. Just remember her, and focus on what you need to do, and we'll be home soon. Okay?"

Mikasa nodded, ignoring Levi's quip about wasting their valuable time. "We'll fight."

"And we'll win, and come back to Keiko."

"Okay." She pulled back, pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth. "I love you," she said quietly.

He kissed her fully, ignoring Armin's very loud complaint. "I love you." Mikasa took his hand as she settled on her horse, and Eren made sure her pack was secure before taking his place between hers and Levi's squad, to the one he led with Armin.

Hanji turned their horse, throwing a wink back to the rest of the Corps, and then they were moving, their horses running loudly to the slowly-opening gates, to the path that would lead them to their goal of five years.

* * *

><p>The first thing Armin noticed when the dust settled was that the hole in Wall Maria was finally, <em>finally<em>, sealed.

The second was that Eren was struggling to free himself from his Titan.

Armin jumped from the building he'd found a reprieve from the Titans on, curling his body at the shock of his heels crashing into the cobblestones. He righted himself as he ran to where Eren had collapsed next to the wall, slumping into a pile after hardening his skin. For now, there were no Titans surrounding them, but staying for too long would lead to an attack.

Jean was already there, his arms wrapped tightly around Eren's waist as he tried to pull Eren from the gooey limbs that threatened to stay attached. "Dammit, Eren," Jean swore. "It's been five years, I thought you mastered this."

Armin dropped next to them, reaching for Eren's arm to yank it away from the heated muscle. Eren's head lolled back against Jean's chest, his breathing labored as Armin and Jean worked to free him from the Titan carcass. "That's the most he's ever hardened his skin, Jean. It was a gamble from the start. I'm surprised Eren could get himself this far out." Armin had expected Mikasa to be the first one here, cutting Eren out without a second thought.

With a few more harsh tugs, Eren's hands and legs were finally freed, the force nearly sending Eren and Jean sprawling. Eren tried to sit up, but he crumpled into himself, his hands and the bottoms of his legs still regenerating. Jean took Eren's arm, slinging it over his shoulder as he picked Eren up and jumped hastily to the ground. Armin followed, sparing a look to the wall as he ran after them.

Where there was once a hole was now covered with the crystalline substance Annie had encased herself in, the same substance that had made up the underground of the chapel they'd almost lost Eren in years ago. Eren's Titan form lay steaming next to the sealed structure, a few Titans crowding around it, eager for any humans that might have lingered, more leaving the scene to find food. They made significant progress that day, but they had been in Wall Maria for almost a week; there would be no telling exactly what they'd lost in the mission until they returned.

"Armin, where's your horse?"

"Around the corner." Jean stopped at the end of the street, adjusting his grip on Eren as Armin whistled for his horse before reaching into his pockets to fire off two signals in quick procession; one to say the mission succeeded, one to say they needed to retreat back to safety. A few more smoke signals lit up the sky, the sound of hooves mingling with Titan steps.

Armin quickly swung his leg over his horse, sitting far back on the saddle as he and Jean sat Eren on the horse. Eren slumped against his chest, his heat nearly burning Armin as he hooked his arms beneath Eren's, both to keep him from falling off the horse and to take the reins. Eren glanced up at him, hazy and disoriented with veins streaking down his cheeks and onto his neck, a thousand questions on the tip of his tongue, but his exhaustion proved too severe to mumble more than, "did I do it?"

Armin nodded furiously. "You did, Eren. Sleep now, we'll be home soon." Eren's head rolled against his shoulder, the steam from his wounds clouding Armin's vision. He glanced behind him, at the horde of Titans slowly making their way over to them. "Jean-"

Jean whistled loudly, but like so many years ago, no horse came to him. "Fuck," he breathed. From farther up the street, a few more people joined the mass of the Corps currently retreating. "Hey, Connie! Give me a ride!"

Connie tugged on the reins of his horse, the animal whining as it was stopped. Once he spotted Jean standing next to Armin's horse, he spurred his horse to run to them. "At least wait until we find a bed!"

"Fuck off!"

Connie's grin fell as he reached a hand out, taking Jean's forearm to help him onto the horse. Connie pointed to Eren as Jean struggled to sit comfortably, "Armin, dude, is he okay?"

"He'll be fine," Armin said, urging his horse into a gallop. The horde wasn't far enough away to guarantee anyone's safety.

They weaved their way through the streets, avoiding the few Titans lingering around buildings until they reached open fields, the houses and churches slowly giving way to trees and hills and rivers. The Corps worked themselves into some semblance of formation, the horde falling further behind them. A smoke signal from the front of the group, an order to change directions and avoid an oncoming Titan. Armin sighed in relief when he noted that the change in direction would send them closer to Wall Rose's gate.

Eren suddenly jumped in Armin's grasp, blinking rapidly, yet cringing at the fading sunlight once he opened his eyes fully. "Mikasa," he gasped, looking around. "Armin, where's Mikasa?"

He didn't have an answer, he'd been wondering the same thing. He'd expected Mikasa to find them the minute she could, find Eren as soon as possible, after all she could do a lot better job cutting down any Titans that got too close than Jean could. "I don't know," Armin admitted, swerving to avoid a toppled tree. "She'll have seen the retreat signal, though. She'll meet us at headquarters."

Except for a few close calls, they returned back to the wall without a hitch, the gate slamming shut behind Jean and Connie, but no one stopped. The mission had been successful, they needed to get back to the castle as soon as possible.

Hanji approached Armin once they returned to the castle, jumping hastily from their horse in a hurry. "Get him to the infirmary," Hanji ordered as Armin helped Eren down from the horse. "I want a full status report as soon as he's healed, got it?"

"Yes, sir." Eren could stand on his own now, but he swayed still, so Armin helped him to sit down. They could move later, get to the infirmary in a little while. Besides, he could see Erwin walking across the lawn, Keiko nestled securely against his chest.

"You don't think Mikasa got hurt, do you?" Eren asked suddenly, leaning against Armin for support.

It would be an easy explanation for why she hadn't met up with them yet. "When you can walk, we'll go look for her," Armin promised. Erwin stopped next to Hanji and Levi, likely asking about the outcome of the mission. Levi glanced over to where Armin and Eren sat, his mask crumbling into one of distress, the pieces of his careful facade falling away to reveal an emptiness Armin recognized whenever Levi lost soldiers, whenever someone in the legion died. "Does Levi look-?"

"Squad Leaders Arlert and Jaeger?" They looked up, Eren shielding his eyes from the late afternoon light. Before them, a young girl stood with her hands behind her back, her head hanging in defeat. Armin recognized her immediately, a young graduate of the most recent Trainee Corps, her thin brown hair framing her face as she purposefully avoided looking at Armin or Eren. Marie, he believed her name to be, a girl Mikasa had chosen for her squad, had chosen to train personally. Saw something familiar in the young girl, Armin supposed.

"Yes?" Eren prompted, his voice thin and breathless. He'd succumb to his exhaustion again soon, Armin needed to get him to the infirmary.

"I'm sorry," Marie choked, and Armin realized that she was crying. "I'm so sorry."

"Hey," Eren stood, reaching for her hand but she stepped back, shaking her head. "What-?"

"I couldn't help her."

Armin took Eren's outstretched hand, standing as they exchanged wary looks. Neither of them particularly knew the girl, but Mikasa trusted her well enough. "Marie," Armin said slowly, holding his hands up.

"We encountered an aberrant just after Squad Leader Eren sealed the wall," she continued as if Armin hadn't spoken, her shoulders heaving. "She told us to go ahead, she would take care of it, and we thought nothing of the order. She's taken down more aberrants than Captain Levi, why should we have worried?" Next to him, Eren stiffened, his hands curling into fists; neither dared to interrupt. Marie slowly brought her hands from behind her back, a long piece of scarlet fabric and a boot dangling from her fingers. "We went back when she didn't join us. This was all we could save I'm _so sorry._"

Eren's hands shook as he reached for the scarf, running his fingers over the fabric, lingering on the darker, uneven splotches of red. "She-?"

"Eren…" Eren wrapped the scarf around his palm once, twice, three times, pressing it to his heart, bowing his head. His shoulders heaved, his eyes screwed as he struggled to breathe. Armin gripped his shoulder, pulling him close as he cried, thick tears spilling from his eyes, clearing the grime in tracks on his cheeks. Armin blinked back his own tears, but at Eren's broken sob, his tiny pleads to _wake up_, he broke as well, crying harshly into Eren's hair. Mikasa's boot fell between them, a memento neither wanted to look at.

"She's dead!" Eren screamed, falling to his knees, taking Armin with him. "Fuck… _fuck_, I should have been with her. I could have saved her!"

"Don't. Please," Armin begged, each word a chore through his tears. "Please, don't blame yourself."

"Squad Leader-"

"Get away!" Eren snarled, lurching towards Marie, but Armin held him back. "You couldn't help her either." His fury was obvious; terrifying as his shoulders shook and his eyes flashed in despair.

Armin waved away Marie and the rest of Mikasa's squad. They would deal with that later. "Eren stop," Armin was pleading with him as Eren struggled in his arms, as if he wanted to transform, to destroy. Armin thought he understood; Eren had lost his mom to the Titans, his dad to his own Titan abilities, and now Mikasa to one as well. Armin felt his chest constrict; _Mikasa was dead_. His best friend, his _family_, was dead. "It's not her fault," he wiped at his nose messily.

"It's mine."

"Eren-"

"I promised her." Eren said, sounding suspiciously calm, empty as he leaned away from Armin, staring pitifully at Mikasa's scarf with a dead gaze. "I promised I would protect her, give her a new life. I couldn't even do that."

"Armin, what-?" He looked up to see his friends, Erwin, Hanji and Levi standing before them. Levi pointedly ignored Eren, ignored looking at the scarf and the boot, his entire body tense. Sasha took Connie's hand, hiding her face in his shoulder as Jean repeated his question.

Armin swallowed thickly, unsure if his heart could survive telling of what happened. "Mikasa, she-" But he didn't need to finish; he recognized the way their faces fell with understanding at Eren's mangled sob.

Erwin kneeled in front of Eren as Keiko reached for her father, her eyes shining with glee, incoherent syllables falling from her lips. "Eren," Erwin said kindly, offering Eren his daughter.

Eren scrambled away from Armin, pushing himself out of Keiko's reach, his eyes wide with fear. He glanced between his daughter and the scarf wrapped around his palm in terror as he jerked away from Keiko's outstretched hand. "I- I can't…"

"Please, Eren," Armin said, wiping his cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.

Levi knelt beside Eren, his hand clutching Eren's shoulder. His voice was quiet, almost inaudible when he spoke, "Keiko can't lose you, too."

Eren shut his eyes tight, holding his arms out and Erwin passed the young girl to Eren's arms. Armin recognized the look in Eren's eyes when he opened them again, the look of complete wonder and adoration and apprehension he'd worn when he held Keiko for the first time.

Then, Eren pulled Keiko to his chest, and he screamed. A moment later, Keiko began to cry as well.

* * *

><p>Eren always paid the most attention in strategy meetings when Armin led them, but with Keiko propped in his lap it was harder to stay focused on the discussion around him. Keiko held his pen, running it messily over his paper and babbling happily. He'd recently started bringing her to meetings within the last month, after the Corps got the funding to finally team up with the Military Police and the Garrison to wipe out the Titans in Wall Maria. Eren didn't have anywhere else to take her; Keiko was too young to stay in their room alone, and Erwin was needed at the meetings, so Keiko stayed in someone's lap, either playing with a toy, his pen, or his hair.<p>

"We'll start in the South, closest to Shiganshina, and then fan out to take out the rest of them," Armin was saying as he pointed to the map behind him. Their old squad, Levi, Erwin, and Hanji each had Armin's plans in front of them as well, and would relay the info to the rest of the Corps in the morning. Once they cleared Wall Maria, they could finally seal Shiganshina, get to his goddam basement, and use Eren's coordinate ability to end the Titans. It should be easy, a two day mission at worst.

But Eren knew better.

None of their missions were ever easy, the death toll was always higher than predicted, new challenges setting them back. And now,with Mikasa gone, they'd be at an even greater loss.

"Who's leading Mikasa's squad?" Sasha asked, interrupting Erwin while she reached for Keiko's hand with an animated grin. Eren had been worried, at first, about Keiko being a distraction or preventing them from being able to do their jobs, but it had turned out okay. Everyone loved Keiko, and they'd learned to strategize above her consistent babbles and shrieks.

Armin glanced at Eren worriedly. "Eren. We're no longer commanding my squad together. He'll be leading his own now."

Keiko squirmed in his lap as Levi and Armin gave everyone the starting date for the mission, and Eren noted it was past her bedtime. She turned to him, pressing her face against his shoulder and playing with the fraying ends of his scarf. She dropped his pen onto the floor, yawning gently and sagging against him. He figured she had fallen asleep, but the eleven month old pushed her face away from his chest very suddenly, her dark eyes fixed on his, her tiny fingers curling into his scarf.

"Mama."

Eren froze, his mouth falling open as her voice pitched higher, her head tilting slightly; _a question_. He realized everyone had gone quiet, Sasha and Jean staring at him sadly, Levi pointedly ignoring him, Erwin looked nervous.

Wasn't a baby's first word supposed to be a happy moment?

"Eren," Armin said very slowly, placing his papers down.

"Meeting's over." Levi said loudly. Eren wondered if it was just as hard for Levi to hear Keiko ask for Mikasa.

Keiko reached for his fingers, holding them as tight as she could while everyone slowly left the room, throwing Eren nervous glances as they went. Levi sat down next to him, gently taking Keiko from Eren's arms. Eren immediately slumped in his seat, pulling the worn scarf over his mouth as if it were his own habit.

Levi draped his jacket over Keiko's tiny frame, her dark eyes peeking over at Eren curiously. "Are you okay?"

"I don't know." Eren sighed, pausing as he glanced between Levi and Keiko. "Mikasa would know what to do."

"She was as new to this as you are, Eren."

Eren nodded, swallowing thickly. If only Mikasa were still alive; he could have handed Keiko over when she asked for her mom, the two of them laughing as Eren grumbled about "dada" not being his daughter's first word. "Where'd she even learn that word from anyway?"

Levi shrugged, running his fingers through Keiko's black hair.. "Maybe she picked it up the last time we were in town."

"I miss Mikasa." Eren blurted, rubbing his eyes harshly.

"I know," Levi said quietly, his head bowed. He kissed Keiko's head, gently. "I miss her, too." Keiko reached for Eren's hand and he complied, allowing her to grasp onto his pointer finger as she smiled sleepily. They stayed like that for what felt like hours, curled into themselves and silent as Keiko squirmed in Levi's hold. Levi spoke again, his voice hoarse with unshed tears. "Do you need a night off? I can get Erwin."

Eren shook his head, reaching for his daughter. "Nah, no. I need to be with her." Levi nodded and they stood, leaving the abandoned meeting room. "Hey, Levi?" Eren asked quietly, and Levi paused before the hallway his room was down. "I'm sorry. I know this is hard."

Levi sighed, looking more exhausted than Eren had seen in years. "It was fucked up, Eren, but she was family. Don't apologize. It'll get easier eventually." Eren tossed Levi his jacket. "She has your nose." He left down the hallway, leaving Eren alone.

Keiko yawned loudly as they turned a corner, her eyes fighting to stay open until they heard a shout from down the hall of Eren's name that had her startling in his arms, and then someone collided with him, engulfing Eren and Keiko in a hug. He recognized them immediately.

"Sasha."

She grinned, taking Keiko from him to cover her tiny face in kisses. Sasha held Keiko on her hip, the young girl resting her head on Sasha's shoulder and Eren couldn't help but imagine the same thing with Mikasa. "You okay?"

"Ah, yeah. I think so."

"Good. We were worried."

"We?"

Sasha rolled her eyes, glancing over her shoulder to where Jean and Connie peeked around the corner. "We." She waved them over. "Jean thought you were gonna hit someone-"

"I did _not_, Sash."

"-my money was on him." Sasha knocked her hip against Jean's as Jean grumbled something. Connie joined them, making faces at Keiko and earning several high pitched peals of laughter in return.

Eren ducked his head, truly grinning for the first time since Mikasa had died. He missed her like crazy, and he knew he always would, but he wasn't alone. He had his friends, his _family_, there with him, to help with Keiko if he needed it, to joke and offer some sense of normalcy, to offer company. He wasn't okay, hadn't been since that day, but he could be soon. It wasn't an ideal situation or household for Keiko to grow up in, but it was full of love. And in their world, wasn't that enough?

"Thanks, you guys." Eren said quietly, interrupting an argument between Sasha and Jean. Armin took his hand, squeezing gently.

Connie threw his arm around Sasha's shoulders, running his finger over Keiko's cheek. "Of course, man. We're here for you. Both of you. Whatever you may need."

"Unless it's diapers in the middle of the night," Jean said, smiling.

Connie swatted at Jean's arm as Sasha laughed. "_Especially_ if it's diapers in the middle of the night."

They'd be okay.

* * *

><p>Eren's mind was on fire.<p>

At least, that's what it felt like. The trees and people before him blurred together, morphing into something intangible as he fell through everything and nothing at once, losing his footing while standing straight up. He couldn't distinguish anything, couldn't tell if someone was speaking to him or if that was the voice in his head, if he was being told to _calm down, don't worry you're fine_, or _just sleep, let it take over and it'll all go away_. Conflict surged through his chest, flooding his chest and muddling his brain, words useless to him, unreachable in the darkness.

_"Eren… Eren can you hear me?"_

Was that Hanji? He couldn't tell if it was their voice, or the voice of a thousand men, ringing and slamming through his head, deafening him.

What had they been trying to do again? Eren thought he could feel the sticky limbs of his Titan body holding tight to his human flesh, begging him back into its warm cocoon. That's right, they had to test how many times he could transform in a row before dropping with exhaustion. There was no telling how many times he'd repeatedly need to transform in the future.

_"It's been years, Eren,"_ Levi had said, standing opposite from Eren across the clearing. _"You should be better at this."_

Ice crashed across his mind, soaking his thoughts and drowning him in smoke, burning his lungs and stinging his senses. How many times? How many times had he transformed? Was he supposed to again? Eren couldn't even find his hand to bite, was he even standing?

He felt something snap behind him, and he collapsed into a pile, his arms and legs shattering to bits and shredding his skin where he lay. The blurry shapes around him slowly shifted into something that resembled Hanji and Armin. Or maybe they were Titans. He couldn't tell. His head hurt, stung like something fierce.

Mikasa charged toward him, shrugging Levi's hand from her shoulder as she nearly barreled through Armin and Hanji. No, that wasn't right. Even she wasn't allowed close to him until Hanji ended the experiment; she needed to get back.

"Daddy!"

That definitely wasn't right.

Eren pushed himself to his knees, his vision finally clearing in time for Mikasa to hurl herself into his arms and bury her face against his shoulder, hardly deterred by his burning flesh. He held her carefully, smoothing his hand through her feather-light hair.

"Keiko, get back!" Armin called, but he didn't make a move to take the young girl from Eren.

Keiko pulled away, placing her palms on his face, holding him steady; his anchor to keep from drowning in his Titan corpse. "Levi let me watch," she said slowly. "Daddy, are you okay?"

Eren nodded, feeling his chest constrict. He planted a kiss on her nose. "Yeah… yeah, Keiko babe. I'm okay." He would be. He had to be. For everyone, for humanity.

For Keiko.

Vaguely, Eren heard Hanji end the experiment, ordering Levi and Armin to clean up anything disturbed by Eren's transformations. His head was still swimming but he could breathe now, his heartbeat slowly evening out, matching his daughter's as she pressed little kisses to his cheeks and forehead.

Keiko smiled, keeping all of his attention on her as the voices in his head faded and the ice in his mind melted into a warmth he only seemed to feel with Keiko so close to him. She pushed his hair back from his head, staring intently, her dark eyes so familiar to him. "I love you."

Eren pulled her close again, pressing his nose to her hair. "I love you too, Keiko."

* * *

><p>"Daddy, what was mama like?"<p>

Eren turned back from the doorway, glancing over to Keiko. He'd thought she'd fallen asleep, but she was staring at him, her dark eyes barely visible under her hair. She'd recently moved into her own room across from Eren's, and although she was almost eight, he stayed with her every night until he was sure she was asleep. He contemplated ignoring her, leaving the room and avoiding the question for, well hopefully forever, but he couldn't do that to her.

"Keiko…"

She sat up, rubbing slowly at her eyes. "Please, daddy. You never tell me about mama."

"Alright, scoot over." Her grin was blinding, loosening the chains constricting his heart as Eren sat down next to her. Running a hand through his hair, he threw one last longing look to the door. He'd hoped this question wouldn't come for a few more years at least. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything," Keiko declared, reaching for her favorite doll.

"Tell me where to start."

Keiko pursed her lips, tucking her doll under her chin. "Start with what mama looked like."

"Just like you."

"Really?"

Eren laughed at the way her entire face lit up, ruffling her hair. "Yes, really. Mikasa had your hair, your eyes, your chin. She was just as beautiful as you are."

Keiko grinned, taking a lock of her hair and pulling it in front of her eyes, fascinated. She brushed it back over her shoulder, tapping her chin as she thought of the next thing to talk about. "How did you and mama meet?"

He faltered, his smile slipping. To her, it was an innocent question. She wanted to know how her parents met. But to him, it marked the night he first murdered someone. "Um," Eren pinched the bridge of his nose. "Mikasa's mom called my dad for a checkup, and he brought me along. But we got there after an… accident with Mikasa's parents, so she came to live with me and my parents. We were best friends from that day out, until eventually we realized we loved each other as much more than just friends." Maybe he'd tell her the full, true story when she was older. Or maybe letting Keiko believe their meeting had been innocent was the better option.

"So mama was your sister?" Keiko asking, her nose scrunching.

"What? No. No way."

"But she lived with you?"

Eren groaned, running his hands down his face. "We never thought of each other as brother and sister."

"Okay," Keiko shrugged. "Was mama strong?"

"The strongest," Eren said, leaning back on his forearms. Keiko followed suit, laying beside him and tucking her face against his shoulder. "She graduated first out of all the trainees, had a higher solo kill count than Levi- though Hanji always said that meant she was too reckless. Mikasa saved my life so many times, saved all of us." It'd seemed like a fatal blow to the Corps when she died. Keiko squirmed, flopping onto her back next to him and pulling his arm around her. He started to run his fingers through her hair. "She was the strongest person I ever knew."

"She was even stronger than Grampa Levi?"

Eren groaned again, rolling his eyes. "Did Sasha tell you to call him that?"

"Yes."

"Good, make sure to tell Levi that when he hears you."

"Why?"

"No reason."

Keiko hit him lightly with her doll, laughing loudly as he tickled her neck in retaliation. When she settled, Keiko pulled her thick blanket over both of them, tucking it beneath his shoulder. "Daddy?" She whispered after a minute, propping herself on her elbow to glance at him.

Moonlight spilled through her open curtains, bathing the room in a milky glow and painting Keiko's skin nearly as pale as her mother's. She needed to fall asleep soon or she'd never get up in the morning. "Yes, sweetie?"

"Do you miss mama?"

The question stole his breath, punching a hole through his chest and ripping the careful stitches he'd made years ago. He missed Mikasa more than he'd ever been able to articulate. "Yes, Keiko, I miss her." He forced a deep breath, "I miss her so much."

Keiko threw her arm over his chest, hugging him tightly as he struggled to keep his composure in front of her. "Would she like me?"

"Like you?" Eren sat up, shocked, pulling the blanket away from Keiko's face. She pouted back up at him. "Her beautiful, strong, incredibly honest and caring daughter? Keiko, Mikasa would absolutely love you."

She looked about ready to cry as she worried her bottom lip. "Promise?"

"Swear it." Keiko nodded, ducking her face against his chest as he lay down next to her again. She didn't say anything, as if unconvinced by what Eren had said. "Hey," he nudged her gently. "I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. You know those books Uncle Armin reads to you?" He felt her nod against him. "He read the same ones to your mom and me when we were little. And we promised that we'd get to the outside world and visit every place we've read about. Things have… changed since then, but we're still going to get there. I'll take you everywhere your mom wanted to go."

"And we'll take lots of pictures for mama?" She whispered eagerly.

"As many pictures as we can."

He felt her grin against his chest, her breathing slowing down. Eren ran his fingers through her hair again, tossing an arm behind his head. He couldn't keep his promise to Mikasa, but he'd keep it now. Losing their daughter wasn't an option. He would free the world and take her everywhere she wanted to go. Keiko deserved it.

* * *

><p>"I'm joining the military."<p>

The announcement startled Eren, his pen falling through his fingers and clattering against the floor, followed by his latest report. He glanced over his shoulder, to where Keiko was sprawled out on his bed, holding one of Armin's books. The first book Armin had shown Eren when they were kids. She flipped through a few pages, stroking her fingers over a picture on one, her eyes filled with a familiar longing he'd seen Armin wear countless times.

Keiko shut the book very slowly before sitting up, her skirt tangling beneath her legs, her hair falling over her shoulder.

Eren turned away, reaching over the side of the bed to retrieve his fallen supplies. "No. You're not." He said as he placed them on the table next to his bed.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her stiffen, her hands curling to fists in her lap. Jean had once told Eren he hoped Keiko never inherited Eren's temper, and Eren was beginning to understand why. Keiko argued constantly with Levi and Hanji, with Armin and Sasha over how missions should be carried out, over how long everything was taking to free the world. Eren had once broken up a fight between Keiko and a new Survey Corps recruit when the boy had said he'd only joined to be praised once they won. She'd broken his nose.

Eren understood his mother's frustrations.

"This isn't for you to decide." Keiko said quietly, tying her hair back with a short ribbon. She'd scarcely mentioned the Trainee Corps over the past few years, but Eren had always ignored the questions, her requests to hear stories of his own training days. He thought it would be a phase, that she'd get over it, apparently he was wrong.

"Look, Keiko babe," Eren ran his hands down his face, feeling very weary and tense. "Why do you even want to join the military?"

"So I can fight with you and uncle Armin. So I can protect everyone!" Keiko began, leaning forward eagerly. "You told me about the outside world. You read me Armin's books every night for years, I want to help make that a reality! I'm tired of living cooped up in these walls like fucking animals, of watching you and everyone else leave- not knowing if you'll come back at all. I'm tired of so many missions failing. I want to help!" She stared at him, looking so incredibly alive and willing to throw her life away and follow in his footsteps. Eren recognized the argument; it was almost exactly what he'd told his mother and father, what he'd preached to Armin and Mikasa and anyone else around him for years.

Eren sighed, and Keiko crumpled, as if sensing what he would say next. "Keiko. We have more than enough soldiers, Wall Maria is just about cleared out-"

"Daddy," she interrupted, glancing at him sadly. "You sealed the wall almost twelve years ago. It should be emptied by now."

She was right. The Corps had had enough recruits, enough talent and initiative to have ended this thing years ago, but the return of Reiner and Bertholdt, of the fucking Ape Titan, had set them back. Keiko was too young to remember the second attack on Trost. He wouldn't bring it up now.

"There's no reason for you to join," Eren said after a long moment.

"I want to help! That's reason enough!"

"You're going to get hurt!" Eren snarled, pushing off of his bed and shoving his hands into his hair. Not her. Not Keiko. He couldn't lose her, too. "People die in training, people die outside the walls!"

"So that's a reason to stop fighting, because people die?" Keiko stood on the other side of the bed, her shoulders tense and eyes watery. She was as easy to read for him as Mikasa had been; and she was furious, furious and confused and so desperate to help. "Jean and Sasha have been training me. I'm not weak." She stalked quietly around the bed until she stood directly in front of him, tilting her head to maintain eye contact. "I'm going to join."

"I can't lose you!" Eren grasped her shoulders, surprise flashing through her dark eyes. Not her. _Not her._ She resembled Mikasa in every way; from her hair to her eyes to the little tilt of her lips. It almost hurt to look at her. It hurt even more to imagine Keiko suffering the same fate as her mom. "I can't lose you."

Her expression softened and she reached up to gently removed his hands from her shoulders, holding both of his hands in hers. "You won't," she whispered, smoothing her thumb across the back of Eren's hand. "I won't die." Keiko looked at him again, smiling sadly. He recognized the look in her eye- the same as Mikasa when she refused to accept an oder or decision. Keiko would not allow him to change her mind. She made her decision to help, to fight to free the world, and nothing Eren said would change that. "I won't die. You and me, uncle Armin, everyone… We'll be free."

Eren pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her thin shoulders tightly. She nestled her face in his neck, whispering promises to his skin she had no control over. "Please," Eren gasped as they broke away. "Please be careful."

Keiko smiled brightly, standing on her toes to press a kiss to his cheek. "I promise, daddy."

"Here," Eren said quietly, reaching for his neck. He pulled off his scarf, wrapping it around Keiko, flipping the ends over her face for himself. She glanced at him, her dark eyes peeking out behind the bright scarf as she tilted her head.

"Daddy…" Keiko readjusted the scarf more comfortably around her neck. "Your scarf?"

"It was your moms," he said, smiling sadly. He'd seen this picture before, the dark eyes and hair starkly contrasting against the red. "She'd want you to have it."

Keiko threw her arms around him again, kissing his cheek and thanking him again before leaving his room to her own across the hall, shouting, "Aunt Sasha! He said yes!" He saw Sasha run past, laughing gleefully as she turned into Keiko's room to help pack her things for three years of training, leaving Eren alone in his room, leaving him alone for the first time since she was born. Three years without his daughter, three years of missions and training exercises. Either of them could die, and it would take days to find out. Eren knew Keiko was strong. He'd snuck into a few of her secret trainings to know that she was already adept at wielding the dual blades and a gun.

But if anything happened to her, Eren didn't know if he could forgive himself. Losing Mikasa had destroyed him, rendered him almost useless for months. Would he come back if he lost their daughter?

He didn't want to find out.

Early the next morning, a carriage from the outer wall arrived to take Keiko away.

* * *

><p>Three years passed slowly, filled with successful and useless missions, choppy letters sent from both Keiko and Eren, but the letters stopped as Keiko's graduation loomed. Until a muggy summer day, only a week before the Trainees would graduate.<p>

Eren sat in Armin's office, upside down on his chair as they spoke with Hanji to plan a mission to Eren's basement. Eren thought a small team could sneak past Reiner and Bertholdt, Armin believed the Corps should wipe out the Titans first, and Hanji seemed to want to go around everything, to lengthen the mission by weeks. A knock on the door forced Eren to sit normally as Sasha burst through, waving a single letter and a huge grin.

She handed it to Eren, and he read it quickly, recognizing Shadis's slanted handwriting immediately.

Keiko was to graduate at the top of the class, securing the number one spot over every other trainee.

* * *

><p>Rain fell in thick sheets around him, soaking the blood into the ground, staining the earth with the blood of those who fell, those who lost their lives to get achieve this feat. Around him, the moans of the dying were barely audible beneath the cracks of thunder and the heavy rain. Titan carcasses littered the fields, the steam slowly dampened by the rain. Eren's own Titan body lay abandoned behind where he sat, one arm and both legs working to regenerate. He glanced around the field, at his dead comrades, at the ones still breathing and looking for survivors, at the dead Titans and traitors.<p>

At victory.

It was over. It had taken years, lifetimes, countless failures but it had worked. Somehow, he'd kept the promise he'd made decades before. No longer would humanity be stuck inside walls. They were free.

He needed to find Keiko. To find Armin and Jean and Sasha and everyone else. Eren had to wait until his legs were fully healed before he stood, ignoring the shooting pain licking up his legs as he set out to where Keiko should have been stationed. He passed countless bodies, felt bile creep up his throat as he passed a young girl huddled over a mangled body, terrible screams and cries wrenching themselves past her lips. Nothing would be the same now.

"Eren."

He turned quickly, the sudden movement throwing him off balance, but Armin grabbed his shoulders, helping him to the muddy ground. "Armin," he gasped, tears finally falling. He hugged Armin fiercely, crying into Armin's tattered jacket as the world crumbled around them. It would take so long to rebuild.

Armin held him just as tightly, taking care to avoid his healing arm. "You're okay?" Armin asked as they pulled away from each other.

"Yeah," Eren nodded, raising his arm weakly. "Nothing too bad. I think. I was out of it for a while. Are you okay?"

Armin gestured to his stomach. "I think a rib or two is broken. I just woke up and I'm dizzy, so maybe a concussion? We need to find Hanji and regroup."

"Keiko."

"I haven't seen her yet." Armin smiled sadly. "But she's more stubborn than you and Mikasa put together. I'm sure she's alive."

Armin insisted that they wait a few more minutes for Eren's strength to return, it would do no good if he lost consciousness again. As they walked, Eren cupped his hands to his mouth, shouting for the people he so desperately needed to see again.

They found Jean and Sasha huddled together against a battered supply cart. Jean's head was wrapped, his arm cradled to his chest while Sasha looked hauntingly pale, her gaze trained on where her leg cut off abruptly below the knee. She perked up when Armin and Eren reached them, but she was in obvious pain.

"Connie?" Armin asked after they'd all assessed each other's injuries. Jean shook his head, and Sasha began to cry. Armin swallow slowly. "Where's Hanji? Levi?"

"No Levi," Jean said quietly, and Eren felt his stomach churn. "Hanji's with Ymir. I think the order to get back to the castle is coming soon. We need to collect the dead, meet with Historia, and plan for the future."

And they could, they could do anything they needed to for as long as it took. There was no threat anymore.

"Have you seen Keiko?" Eren glanced between his friends, but none of them had an answer for him. She _wasn't dead_. He stalked away, wobbling slightly but he needed to find Keiko. Ignoring Armin's cries to come back, to wait for them, Eren marched over the nearest hill. Left rear- where Keiko was assigned. He was greeted by the sight of more death, of cadets and veterans working quickly to get the dead bodies into the carts, unperturbed by the stinging rain drenching their skin.

He scanned the field as he walked, glancing at every body enough to know that they weren't Keiko, until he found her.

She was lying by a tree, motionless as the rain fell across her face, smearing the blood on her cheeks and clothes. Eren ran to her, his heart pounding, shrieking through his veins, too quiet, too quiet and too still. He fell at her side, grasping desperately at her wrist as a sob ripped past his lips, his chest heaving. No, no, no, no-!

Eren held her hand tightly, listening for a pulse, for _anything_, his heart threatening to burst through his chest. _Too still, too quiet, she's_- "Fuck," Keiko gasped, her body lurching, her lips pulled down in pain. She opened her eyes, her gaze moving slowly, hazily, to her hand, engulfed in both of Eren's, to his face, and she tilted her head. "Daddy?" She whimpered.

"I'm here," Eren sobbed, pulling her close. She grunted in pain, but threw her other arm around his shoulders. "I'm here- I'm here, Keiko babe. I promise." He leaned back, smoothing his thumb over her cheek, wiping away the tears and blood that stained her skin. "Where are you hurt?"

Keiko glanced down at her body, grimacing. "My wrist." She held up her other hand, and Eren saw the way it bent unnaturally. "My left ankle is sprained, my right leg broken I think."

"Your head's bleeding," Eren said, pushing her hair away from her forehead.

"Is it?"

A long, angry cut ran from her temple into her hair. "Do you feel dizzy, nauseous, anything?"

"Both, but I don't think it's a concussion. I've been awake this entire time." Keiko smiled sadly closing her eyes against the rain. "We're alive."

"Yeah," Eren agreed, his laugh more like a sob than anything else. "We are. And you know what else?" She looked up at him again. "We did it."

Her tears finally began to fall in earnest, her voice barely audible over the noise. "It's over?"

They would never again hear a Titan stomping over the grounds, never again watch as friends and comrades and family were devoured by the beasts, never again go to war.

Eren looked to the sky, allowing the rain to wash the war from his features. "It's over."

"I love you, daddy."

"I love you, too, Keiko babe."

She was quiet for a long moment; Eren began to worry if she had been wrong about not being concussed until she spoke again. "Do you think mama would be proud?"

Eren smiled, pressing his lips to Keiko's palm. He'd known Mikasa better than anyone else, better than he'd known himself at times, and he finally kept his promise from so long ago; the Titans were gone, the world theirs for the taking. And he kept Keiko alive, too. She'd prospered under his care, learning to wield words, guns, and swords before training properly under Shadis. She helped save the world. They saved the world. And although Eren didn't keep Mikasa alive, their daughter was safe. He knew Mikasa would love that. "As proud as possible."

"Eren! Keiko!" Armin fell into their embrace, careful to avoid anything other than Keiko's head as he kissed her forehead and cheeks over and over again. "I'm so glad you're okay."

Keiko's smile was blinding. "You too, Armin."

Eren pulled Keiko to his arms again, hooking an arm under her legs and letting her wrap her good arm around his neck. They started back to where the others were waiting, where their future was waiting. "Hey, Armin. How long do you think it'll be before we get clearance to leave?" Keiko giggled into his shoulder.

"I'm not sure. Could be a few months, maybe even a couple of years." Armin said.

"Hm." The world was theirs now, what was waiting a little while before leaving to explore? "Keiko," she hummed in reply, sounding sleepy as she tucked her chin into her scarf. "Where do you want to go first?"

The sun peeked out behind the dark clouds, the rain beginning to lighten up as they walked. Keiko pressed her nose into his neck, a habit she didn't even know she inherited from Mikasa. "The icecaps."

Eren grinned, kissing her forehead gently. "The icecaps it is."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** one day I will write these two happy with their child. today is not that day


	13. Revelation

**Revelation**

Prompt from mikasas-ackermen on tumblr: Eren realizing he likes Mikasa

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><p>It takes the end of the world to realize he loves her.<p>

It takes coming face to face with the Titan that killed his mom, surrounded by their friends and comrades, a situation more desperate than they've ever faced before; his arms are still healing, Mikasa is trying so hard to fight through her pain, but no one is close enough to help them. They'll die here, in a heap on the ground.

It takes Mikasa throwing himself over him, desperate to save him even if it means her own death, and her ill-timed confession of feelings Eren had recently come to see, to realize how he's loved her all along. To stand up and save her.

He can't lose her. He can't, _can't_ lose her in the open field, not to the monsters he's lost more than enough to already. He refuses to leave her, ignores her when she tells him to go, doesn't miss the way her arms close around him like a vice, the way her chest heaves against his back as she tries to stifle her gasps of pain.

Eren doesn't get a chance to meet her in the infirmary, to tell her what he realized. They're taken straight to an old cabin in the woods, Mikasa joining a few hours later once Hanji gets her away from the castle.

He wants to say something, but between experiments with Hanji, meetings with their squad, and constant interruptions from Levi's ever-present new squad, Eren never gets her alone. And then the plan goes wrong. Kenny Ackerman ruins their plans and takes Eren far, far and underground and away from those who love him as fiercely as he loves them.

She never leaves his mind even as he hangs strung up on an altar, as he learns that Rod Reiss needs Historia to eat him. He worries about Mikasa, about who Kenny Ackerman is to her, about Armin and Sasha, about Hanji and Connie and Jean, about the manipulation Rod is using to convince Historia of his plan. Of dying without getting to tell Mikasa how he felt.

But she finds him; she always does. Fights through anyone in her path to save him before he's destroyed by Kenny or Rod, and Eren knows the ride back to the cabin is not the proper time to tell her. She's upset about the Ackerman name; he can barely walk under the weight of recent memories and revelations and being starved by Reiss. Eren can only hold her tight as they ride, whispering _thank you_ to her back as she holds his hand and tells him again and again that he'll be okay.

They're pulled into a meeting right away, to begin explaining everything Eren and Historia learned, and it's a blessing when Hanji finally says they'll plan the new structure for the government later. Eren needs to rest and Hanji needs to change the bandage on their arm.

Mikasa isn't there when he wakes up, but Jean, Connie, and Armin are all asleep in their bunks. Eren doesn't know how long he's been asleep, but his stomach is aching, (and maybe his heart when he sees she isn't curled up at his bedside,) and his legs desperately want to be stretched, so he leaves his bed, creeps past Hanji's room into the kitchen. He finds some fruit, something small to appease his stomach before he can eat large meals again, shivers when he notices that the door leading outside is open, propped with a small bucket and letting the frigid winter air in.

He glances outside, preparing to toe the bucket back inside and close the door, but he pauses when he sees Mikasa sitting on the top step, her thin blanket thrown hastily over her sleep clothes, her head bowed.

She jumps a bit when Eren peels the blanket away from her shoulder, sitting close to her and pulling the blanket around himself, leaning into her warmth. Mikasa takes his hand, resting her head against his.

"Are you okay?" She asks quietly.

Eren nods slowly, turning his nose into her hair. "Why are you out here?"

"Just… thinking."

"About Kenny Ackerman?" The name leaves a sour taste on his tongue. Mikasa doesn't repond, but her silence is answer enough. Eren changes the subject, hoping to take her mind off his most recent kidnapper. "How long was I out?"

"A few days." Her fingers still against his neck. "We're moving back to the castle the day after tomorrow."

He nods again, feeling exhausted but oddly at peace as Mikasa works her arm around his back and smooths her fingers through the fine hairs at the nape of his neck. Eren hums against her hair, throwing an arm across her waist. It's freezing outside, their short breaths mingling with the snowflakes dusting the air around them, but it's warm huddled under the blanket. They could get sick if they stay out much longer, but he doesn't want to leave her. He missed this during the mess of the coup, while he was kidnapped by Kenny. He missed being so close to Mikasa, her fingers steady around his, her hand the only one allowed to touch his weak spot, her heart bared to him.

He loves her.

Eren feels his stomach clench, desperate to tell her now, but reluctant to ruin this; this peace, this _thing_ they had together. He clears his throat. "So the coup was successful?"

"Yeah." Mikasa takes his hand by her hip, linking their fingers and squeezing gently. She's silent for a while, and Eren worries that she's fallen asleep against him when she speaks again. "You remembered something, didn't you? Something you kept from Hanji." She doesn't sound accusatory, only curious as she leans back and he raises his head to look at her properly.

"Yeah," he grimaces, memories of his dad and Freida Reiss and his first transformation running through his head. He doesn't want to think about it now, he and Historia will have to explain the rest in the morning anyway. "I'll tell you before everyone else."

"I trust you, Eren." She works her fingers into his hair fully, scratching lightly at his scalp, staring intently into his eyes while the world continues softly around them. His anchor. "You can tell me when you're ready."

He loves her. One of the few constants in his life, Mikasa stayed with him through losing their families, through discovering his Titan ability, Corps expeditions and the coup; offering herself to him and his goal wholeheartedly while asking for nothing but his presence in return. Eren once thought she cared so much just to keep a promise to his mom, but he's learned since then, through all they've experienced together, Mikasa does it because she loves him, too.

Eren cups her cheek gently, rubbing his thumb across her cold skin. She leans into his touch, eyes fluttering closed, and Eren wonders how long she's been outside, alone in the cold with her thoughts instead of waking him first, because it's what they've always done when memories of the past consume them. They never turn the other away, offering their bed or arms as a solace from the horrors they live in; a habit only strengthened from their childhoods. They know each other inside and out, stay with each other because doing so is one of the things that makes sense in this world-

"I love you." He blurts quietly, shouting it in the dead of night, screaming because he needs to let her know; the words slipping from his lips to mingle with the light snowflakes, to fall between them in the silence that follows. She glances at him, blinking slowly, her throat working as if waking from a dream. "Shit… Mikasa, I-"

"I love you, too." Mikasa says, calm and even and composed as she leans her forehead against his. He feels his heart slow, because even if he already knew it, it soothes him to hear Mikasa say it.

They stay like that, closer than they've been before, breaths intermingling as he holds her to him, his arms tight around her shoulders and Mikasa's hand pressed firmly against his heart.

Eren drops a kiss to her temple before standing, pulling her up with him and wrapping the blanket back around her shoulders with his arm as they head back inside.

"Levi will kill me if I get you sick," Eren says as he pushes the bucket away from the door.

Mikasa rolls her eyes. "A cold won't keep me out of the field."

He puts his arm around her again, pulling her close as they sneak up the stairs because he knows Mikasa won't let something so small stop her. "So Kenny's your-"

"I don't want to talk about it," Mikasa groans, knocking her head against his shoulder, her skin reflecting prettily in the moonlight.

He kisses her forehead outside of the girl's room, and Mikasa takes his face to press a proper kiss to his mouth before bidding him goodnight and slipping through the door.

Still grinning, Eren makes his way back to his room. They'll discuss it more in the coming days, what they are, the futures they promised each other so many times. Now's not the time to start a relationship, the stakes are too high, the threats too numerous, but that won't stop them from aiming for one, won't stop what they feel for each other.

He loves her.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I just want to say thank you to everyone who's been reviewing/favoriting/following this story! It means so much to me that you all love it so much! I read every single review and they all brighten my day considerably. And I know I don't really respond to them, (since this isn't AO3 and I can't reply in a comments section and I don't want to bore all of you by responding to them at the ends of chapters mostly because it'll just be me crying and telling you I love you), but I do really appreciate every single one of you!

And I'm always taking prompts, here, my AO3, or tumblr; all at miikasaa

Also, to the anonymous reviewer who said they had a hard time picturing Petra as Effie, I can't picture Petra there either. But I didn't know who else to put and thought I could spin it in a way that works lmao.


	14. Wish I Were Here

**Wish I Were Here**

Continuation of 1. Remembering You

Determined to find out exactly how Eren knew her name, Mikasa seeks him out to get answers. What she doesn't expect is the tale Eren tells her of past lives, giant monsters, and a love he thought he'd lost.

* * *

><p>"Do you know him?"<p>

"Who?"

"The boy from a few weeks ago. Eren. It looked like you knew him."

Levi scoffed, turning back to the stove to stir the sauce he'd been warming up. "I don't know every kid in this fucking city, Mikasa."

She knew that, of course she did. "But you reacted pretty violently when he introduced himself. I thought maybe-"

"Maybe I hated his name."

Mikasa rolled her eyes, groaning quietly. When Levi didn't say anything else, she dropped her gaze to the textbook propped in her lap. Classes had just started, but her assignments were already keeping her up late. Plus, she hadn't seen Eren since her first day in the city, and her thoughts were drifting to him more often than she'd like to admit. She often thought of how he'd reacted to her, his eager expression falling after only a few minutes, how he'd already known her name…

"Do _I_ know him?" Her voice was quiet and small, a hopeful question she couldn't find the answer to in her mind.

"You said yourself you've never seen him before," Levi said, dumping the sauce onto the pasta. "Primary school?"

Mikasa shook her head, tapping her pen against her bottom lip. "I would have remembered his eyes."

"Disgusting." He took the book from her lap, closing and sliding it across the table before shoving her feet off of the extra chair. Dropping a bowl in front of her, Levi took his seat at the end of the table. "Eat. We'll get more furniture for your room in the morning."

The next afternoon, Mikasa left Levi alone with the new furniture, saying she wanted to explore the city and find a few more bus routes before she got too swamped with schoolwork. But there was another reason, as well. It was her first day away from Levi since moving to the city with him, and she wanted to find Eren and get an explanation from him.

Mikasa stopped at the bench last, her hands shoved deep in her pockets as she scanned the crowds around her. It was nearing dinner time, the sidewalks and streets filled with people trying to get back home, car horns blaring and vendors screaming, a symphony to drown out her erratic heartbeat. This was stupid; what was she trying to accomplish? There was no guarantee Eren knew her, he might have heard Levi calling for her. Maybe he didn't even live in the city and had only been visiting a friend.

She stood, heart pounding as she tried to think of the fastest way back to the apartment, when a flash of pale yellow hair stopped her. Mikasa ran to the nearest crosswalk, grasping the girl's shoulder to keep her from crossing.

"What the fuck-" The girl turned, taking Mikasa's wrist and squeezing harshly, as if to break her bones, but she paused, her icy eyes widening slowly, and then she sighed, tossing Mikasa's hand away. "What do you want?"

Ignoring the girl's hostility, Mikasa started, feeling inexplicably breathless as she spoke, "three weeks ago, you stood with a boy, also blond, right?" She should go, leave the girl alone, but Mikasa recognized her from that day, her droopy eyes, thin hair, the white sweatshirt. The girl didn't answer. Mikasa groaned, trying to think of a way to explain the situation without sounding crazy. "I met a boy here, and when I turned around after leaving, he was with the boy you'd been with. Does that make any sense?"

"Oh." The girl looked uneasy, her eyes darting between Mikasa and the road. She shifted her weight, brushing her hair from her eyes. "Yeah, I know him. So what?"

Mikasa swore her heart leaped as a smile fought its way to her lips, her pulse thrumming in her ears at the possibility of seeing Eren again. Maybe she wasn't wrong for doing this. "I want to meet with him."

"No."

Mikasa frowned. "I-"

The girl stepped closer, glaring furiously up at Mikasa. "It's not a good idea."

"Why not? I just want to talk."

"He doesn't need you in his life."

Mikasa narrowed her eyes, squaring her shoulder to use her height as an advantage over the girl. "I think that's for him to decide."

She practically snarled at Mikasa, staring harshly before finally stepping back, her shoulders sagging and her hair falling in front of her eyes. "Fine. Don't say I didn't warn you."

"What are you- hey!" The girl turned away, crossing the street and forcing Mikasa to jog to catch up. She resisted the urge to stick her tongue out at the girl's back; she was taking Mikasa to Eren, no sense in pissing her off even more. "I'm Mikasa," she said after matching the girl's gait, while they waited for the light to change at an intersection.

"Annie," she said, sighing it into the breeze as she glanced at Mikasa sadly.

Annie led her down a few more blocks, through an alley, and around a small, gated park before pausing in front of an apartment building. They walked into the building and Annie stopped at a small call box, holding down a button. After a minute, the static cut out, and Mikasa could hear two people arguing about who would answer.

_"Hello?"_

"Armin, it's me," Annie said, shifting uneasily on her feet.

_"Oh, hey! Come on up."_ The call box fizzled back into silence as a loud _beep_ echoed through the room.

Annie pressed for the elevator, and they waited in silence, their shoulders squared and heads turned away from each other. In the elevator, Mikasa reached for her neck, pulling the scarf over her mouth while Annie popped her gum loudly, the tiny buttons lighting up as they rose up the floors. Mikasa wasn't sure why she'd brought the scarf, (she still wasn't sure why Eren had _given_ it to her,) but if things went wrong she could return it as an excuse for showing up.

They were in front of a door on the sixth floor when Annie turned to her again, looking almost desperate. "You're sure about this?"

"Yes." Her stomach was knotting, and Mikasa realized she hadn't yet thought of what to say to Eren.

Annie knocked loudly on the door, and not a minute later it opened, the blond boy, _Armin_, grinning down at Annie with a bowl in hand. "Annie-!"

"I brought a surprise." She hooked her thumb back toward Mikasa.

Armin glanced at her, his smile falling immediately. "Annie… This isn't-"

"Yo, Armin, if that's Annie tell her she's late and I want my movie back," someone called from inside. Mikasa felt her stomach flip when she recognized the voice.

Annie took Mikasa's wrist, brushing past Armin and leading her into the small apartment. "Wait, Annie! This really isn't a-" She ignored him, taking Mikasa through the kitchen into the living room, where Eren was lying upside down on the couch, several twizzlers stuffed into his mouth as he watched the documentary playing on the TV.

"Eren." He hummed, folding his arms behind his head without looking up. Mikasa felt Annie's nails dig into her wrist, but Mikasa was frozen in place, unable to say anything to anyone in the room. Armin stood behind them, his hands hovering above Annie's shoulders. "Dammit, Eren, get up."

"Jeez, okay." He stood, dropping the candy into its package and smoothing down the collar of his hoodie as he shut off the TV before turning, with a glare to face Annie. "What's so import-" Annie pushed Mikasa forward, and Eren stopped, stepping backwards and stumbling over a controller. "Holy shit." He whined, looking to Armin desperately. "Annie-"

"She wanted to talk to you."

"Eren," Mikasa stepped forward; he matched her with a step back. "I want to know how you knew my name."

He ignored her, looking between Armin and Annie for help. Annie shrugged, turning on her heel and pushing Armin from the room. "We'll give you guys some time," Annie said. Mikasa could hear their whispered conversation as Annie all but dragged Armin to the door, bits and pieces floating back to where she stood with Eren, broken sentences and cut off exchanges of _bad idea_, _he really doesn't need this_, _this is so bad_, until the door slammed shut and she was left alone in the silence with Eren.

His hand was raised, as if to be a barrier between them. "You need to go," Eren said hurriedly, glancing around the room. He kicked the controller closer to the TV, pacing the space between them as he pointedly avoided looking at her.

"Eren-"

"You need to go," he said again, brushing past her into the small kitchen, toward one of the bedrooms.

"Eren, wait!" Mikasa followed him, weaving her way through the clothes and books littering the kitchen floor. She grabbed his wrist and he froze, wrenching it from her touch and whirling to face her. She'd expected him to be angry, furious at her for showing up at his house and demanding answers, anything other than the undeniable sadness dulling his bright eyes, the tears pooling and threatening to spill. "Eren…"

"Please," Eren whispered, looking away from her to wipe at his eyes. "Please don't do this."

"Don't do what?" She took his hands gently, wishing to offer some comfort from the pain she seemed to bring him. He intertwined their fingers as if it was the most natural thing to him. "Please, Eren. Please explain this to me."

"You aren't going to like it."

"Try me."

"I'm in love with you."

Mikasa frowned, dropping his hands as her stomach fell again. There was something in the sincerity of his voice… But they'd never met until a few weeks ago. "I don't understand."

"This was a mistake," Eren said, pressing his hands to his face. "I'm sorry."

"Well that was hardly an explanation."

He stiffened, glaring at her through his fingers. "Why'd you even come here?"

"Why did you trip in front of me?"

Eren closed his fingers, hiding from her, his shoulder slumping. "I didn't do it on purpose." He mumbled it into his hands, turning away from her.

Mikasa rolled her eyes. "That was the worst fake fall I've ever seen." She reached for his hands again, and he let her pull them away from his face, but avoided her gaze.

"You still got up to help me."

"I had to make sure you didn't hurt yourself."

"You're just like her," Eren whispered, smiling sadly.

Mikasa stepped back, but his hold on her hands kept her close. "Your girlfriend?"

"No. You." He sighed, resigned as he tugged on her wrist, gently leading her to the table and sitting across from her. "This isn't going to make sense to you," Eren warned, throwing his arm over the back of his chair. Mikasa nodded. "I know you from a past life."

She couldn't help it; she laughed. Covering her mouth, Mikasa laughed loudly, shaking her head until she realized Eren _wasn't_ laughing, but staring at her sadly. "You can't be serious." Mikasa said once her giggles had subsided.

"Completely." Mikasa moved to speak again, but he cut her off, holding his hands up. "Just let me explain, okay?" She nodded again. "You know about the Titan War, right? Well, we were a part of that. We both fought in the military after our parents died, and with Armin and a few others, we helped to save the world."

She didn't understand. The history textbooks spoke of this time, but the names of the heroes were never used, or when they were they definitely weren't 'Eren' or 'Mikasa.' He couldn't be telling the truth, wouldn't she remember? Remember living through the war, the deaths of people she loved, or saving the world?

Mikasa shook her head. She had been crazy for doing this. He was just telling her lies, making fun of her, and his friends would jump out and laugh at his elaborate prank to embarrass her. "I should go-"

"Wait!" He grabbed her hand, staring at her desperately. "Please, at least let me finish."

Everything inside her screamed to take her hand back, to flee the apartment. "Fine."

Eren nodded. "Look, when you, er, the old you, were nine your parents were killed and I saved you. You came to live with my family after that, but the Titans broke down the wall and I lost my mom. We joined the military because I had the dream to see the outside world, and you refused to leave my side. I thought you were insufferable at first, and it took me a few years, but I realized you did it because you loved me. And when I almost lost you, I realized I loved you, too." Eren paused, glancing away from her and propping his head in his hand. He shook his head, laughing bitterly. Mikasa swallowed thickly, her stomach curling uncomfortably. "The final battle is where I lost you. We were both heavily injured and I lost sight of you. I was exhausted from shifting. You… I know you thought I was dead, and I didn't get to you in time to show you I wasn't." His voice broke and he turned away, breathing unsteadily.

Mikasa covered his hand with hers, squeezing gently as he closed his eyes. His shoulders were slumped again, his mouth turned down harshly, and his hand a rigid fist on the table. It hurt him to think about it, to tell her, to have her so close. "You can stop-"

"No," he whispered, glancing back to her. He cleared his throat, straightening his back as if to give himself more courage. "I don't remember everything that happened after I lost you, but I know I died in one of the carts on the way back. And then, when I was eight, it hit me. I was playing with Armin in my backyard, and I remembered everything. Couldn't leave my fucking room for weeks I was so distraught with what I saw. My parents talked me through it, explained it. A few months later Armin remembered too, and gradually we found everyone else, but we never found you."

A sharp pain burst across her head, catching her off guard and centering at her temple. She pressed her fingers to the spot, frowning. Nothing Eren was saying made sense. There were folklores, of course, of reincarnation, but the details were never expanded upon, and now all she had was Eren's tale, his own memories. Her head ached fiercely as she tried to sort through everything he'd told her.

"Why now?" She asked, staring at their hands. If this was true, if Mikasa once lived through the Titan Era, she should have remembered. Like Armin and the… _others_. She knew, now, why Eren had known her, but was it worth it? Mikasa had her answers, but Eren's explanation had only raised more questions. She had once loved Eren, been close to Armin, but none of it mattered now. Mikasa was not the girl from then, and she did not have the memories everyone else seemed to share.

Oh, but how she wished she did.

Eren intertwined their fingers, rubbing his thumb across the back of her hand slowly, reassuringly, and Mikasa wondered how much of this was his own doing, and how much was a memory of his past actions.

"I don't know," he said, and Mikasa looked back up. He kept his gaze trained on their hands. "Honestly, I never thought I would see you again. Armin tried to convince me it was for the best, that it could mean you were safe and happy with your parents." She chose not to tell him about the break in and brutal murders that had placed her in Levi's custody in the first place. "When I saw you with Levi… I thought you'd- I thought you would remember me, too," he finished quietly, playing lightly with her fingers.

Was she supposed to remember? Eren had said he remembered when he was younger, did it simply mean her time hadn't come yet? "Wait," she said slowly, brow furrowing as she tried to process everything. Her, a soldier? "You know Levi?"

"Shit." Eren smiled guiltily. "Yeah, he was our superior during the war, and also your cousin. Is he still…?"

"Yes," she frowned again. "So he did know you." She scoffed, unsurprised that Levi had tried to keep her from seeing Eren. "The liar. Why wouldn't he tell me?"

"There's no guarantee he knows," Eren said quickly, squeezing her hand again. "He might not."

"He recognized you." Mikasa said, and Eren made a face.

"Okay, yes, but he couldn't have told you. One of my old teachers told us that if you tell someone who hasn't figured it out on their own, it could really mess them up. Being forced to remember the trauma they went through could ruin what they've created in their new life and lead to violence or depression."

"You're telling me right now."

"_Fuck_." He slapped his free hand against his forehead, groaning loudly. "I'm sorry," he mumbled against his wrist, muffling his apologies in the sleeve of his hoodie. "Shit, Mikasa, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You caught me off guard and you wanted to know and I _wasn't thinking-_"

Mikasa glanced to their hands again as Eren continued, apologies falling rapidly from his lips. He'd said earlier that they'd loved each other in their past lives. If she'd loved him, then wasn't she supposed to find him again? She tried to picture it, living with Eren as a child, following him through the most brutal war in history, falling in love with his loud personality… but she couldn't. Mikasa couldn't see herself standing next to Armin and Eren, surrounded by their friends as they faced beasts as tall as skyscrapers.

She couldn't imagine any of it.

Why couldn't she remember?

Her head hurt.

"Why not me?" Mikasa whispered, her voice shaking. Eren's mouth snapped shut, his hand falling heavily into his lap. He let go of her hand, sliding from his chair to kneel before her. Resting his palms on her knees, Eren tried to meet her gaze, but she avoided him, letting her hair hide her away.

"Mikasa…"

She shook her head, her hands curling into fists in her lap. "Why can't I remember?"

Eren covered her hands with his as the silence thickened between them, both unsure of what to say. Mikasa felt her chest constrict, tears threatening to wet her eyes as she tried, tried _so hard_ to remember, to find familiarity in anything Eren told her.

"I don't know why you can't remember, but-"

Mikasa stood, her fingers reaching to grip her neck reflexively, a choked cry slipping past her lips when she touched the fabric of Eren's scarf. This scarf meant something to him, to _them_, and he'd given it to her to appease his own broken heart. He'd hoped it might jog her memories, make her remember everything, but it was nothing more than a scarf. She didn't have the memories, didn't know the significance of it, of Eren, of her past life, of _anything._

She didn't know anything.

"I have to go." Unwinding the scarf, Mikasa turned from Eren, heard him curse as he stood up quickly to follow her, but she ignored him, holding the scarf in her hands carefully. It meant something to Eren.

It meant nothing to her.

"Mikasa-"

"I'm sorry." She dropped the scarf into his open hand before wrenching the door open and walking quickly to the elevator, but he stopped her, grabbing her wrist before she made it far down the hallway. Her throat ached.

Eren cursed again, tugging gently on her wrist until she faced him. "Please don't do this."

Funny how the meaning behind a phrase could change so quickly. Now, it was Mikasa with the tears in her eyes, the heavy breathing, while Eren struggled with finding the words to make her stay, to find an answer to what he considered a problem.

"This was a mistake."

"Maybe not." Eren said, holding the scarf out again. She did not take it. "Everyone else, yeah they remembered on their own, but what if that isn't the only way to remember? What if some people do need to be immersed in the memories, told everything in order to recall?"

He looked so hopeful, staring at her with wide eyes, a hesitant smile playing on his lips as he held the scarf between them, his fingers secure around her wrist.

Who did he want her to remember for?

Briefly, Mikasa wondered if he'd separated her from the past life he was so hung up on.

"I'm sorry, I know this is a lot," Eren continued when Mikasa did not. "Sasha's having a movie night on Friday. Everyone's going to be there, maybe you could come? Meet everyone again?"

She wanted to say no, turn him down and run, run and never look back, but something kept her there, glancing between Eren and his scarf. The desire to meet the people that had once meant so much to her? The opportunity to remember everything? Or the chance to get Eren off her back for good?

"Okay," Mikasa whispered, unsure of her reasoning.

Eren grinned, tossing the scarf around her shoulders. She gasped, jerking away, but he didn't seem to notice as he clasped her hands in of his. "Meet me outside Friday at six, okay? We'll walk over together."

Mikasa nodded, turning to the elevator. Eren followed, leaning against the wall as she waited for the doors to open. Once she stepped inside, Eren held the doors, smiling softly at her again.

"I'm so glad I found you." He stepped back, letting the doors shut as Mikasa pressed for the lobby. "See you Friday, Mikasa!"

As soon as she reached the lobby, Mikasa bolted from the elevator, ripping the scarf from her neck to keep from losing it, her head spinning and aching as she pushed past everyone standing between her and the streets. She didn't know him, didn't know the history he was so keen on her remembering, she didn't know _anything_!

And it didn't upset her as much as she thought it would.

Mikasa didn't remember him, but what of it? Was it truly a bad thing that she could not recall watching the people she loved get eaten? Wasn't it bad enough she had to watch her family die at such a young age in this life?

"Mikasa!"

She stopped just shy of the doors and glanced furiously around the full room. Armin stood with Annie, his hands up to placate her as he stepped hesitantly to where she stood, and Mikasa thought of how frantic, crazed even, she must look to the strangers in the building.

Armin frowned, looking to Annie for help but Annie only shrugged, staring at Mikasa sadly. "Did something happen with Eren?" Armin asked, so kindly and knowingly because he knew, he knew everything about who she once was while she stayed lost.

"I don't know you!" Mikasa screamed, her tears finally falling as she choked back a sob. "I don't know any of you!"

"Mikasa- wait!"

She ran, shoving her way through the door and sprinting down the street. It had been a mistake. A mistake, a mistake, a mistake, and nothing more. She should have dropped it, ignored Eren and her own selfish desire to _know_.

Her vision swam as she ran blindly through the city, weaving her way around everyone and ignoring anyone who tried to stop her, to help her. She did not need help, she needed to get home, to Levi, to the family she'd managed to scrape together after years of uncertainty, to where things made sense, where she woke up each morning without the thoughts of Titans and lost loves and memories that were not her own.

She still did not have a key to Levi's apartment, and she received many muffled complaints from the neighbors as she stood outside the door, pounding loudly with her fist. Wiping her nose on her free sleeve, she kept her eyes firmly on the peephole, determined to forget everything Eren had told her.

"I'm coming, stop with the fucking knocking already-" Levi wrenched the door open, his anger fading immediately as he took in Mikasa's disheveled appearance, the tears streaking down her cheeks. "Mikasa…?" He took her wrist, pulling her inside the apartment. "What the fuck happened. Do I need to-?"

Mikasa shook her head, choking out a painful, bitter laugh. There was no longer a constant ache pounding against her skull, but a light pain that flared up whenever she tried to think through the things she'd been told. "I messed up," she said, her voice cracking.

Levi glanced down to the scarf wrapped tightly around her palm. "You went to see Eren." She nodded. "Fuck. I'm sorry, Mikasa. If you were supposed to find out at all, it shouldn't have been like this."

"I don't care." She shoved Eren's scarf into his outstretched hand, and stepping around him and the half-built furniture to her room at the opposite end of the apartment, kicking off her shoes and letting them fall.

"Mikasa. " She gripped her doorframe, everything about her threatening to fall, to crumble and shatter and remain in tiny shards on the ground. Levi stared at the scarf, bowing his head slowly. "Do you… do you remember?"

"No."

Mikasa slammed the door shut, spinning to fall into her bed and folding her arms over the back of her head; the steady ache at her temple keeping her awake long after the sun set and her screaming subsided.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Sorry this continuation took so long but! There will be one more part and then this little reincarnation au will be done with. Thank you guys for reading! I hope you enjoyed!


	15. Royale

**Royale**

Five years ago, Eren Jaeger joined the police force to apprehend the Ackermans, the most dangerous assassin duo the country has ever encountered. But as the incompetence of his department becomes clear, and his affair with Mikasa Ackerman stretches on, Eren must make a decision: stay with the police force or accept Mikasa's proposition. [ Assassin AU ]

Word Count: 10,051

**A/N:** I'm sorry my updates have been few and far between lately! All of my dumb one-shots end up being ridiculously long, but I hope you enjoy!

This one is borderline M; there's allusions to sex, but the most they do is make out against a wall.

* * *

><p>"Look alive people, we've got another tip on the Ackermans." Erwin Smith, the chief of the New York Police Department, dropped a large manila folder onto the conference table, a few papers spilling out as he took his seat at the head of the table. He began leafing through the papers, pushing a few across the table to the team assembled around him.<p>

Eren picked up his paper, leg bouncing idly as he scanned the content quickly, passing it to his partner, Annie, once he'd finished. She appraised it silently.

"According to the anonymous tip," Erwin continued, tapping at his laptop to bring up their spread on the criminals to the board behind the group. One blurry picture for each criminal. That was all they fucking had. Blurry pictures of a man, estimated to be in his early forties, Levi Ackerman, and a girl, known to be twenty-four- Levi's cousin, they had discovered- Mikasa Ackerman. Both pictures were from a convenience store camera in Chicago, the only pictures of the Ackermans on file. "Their next target is the mayor of the city, and they'll be striking this afternoon, at his press conference for improving education."

From across the room, Reiner snorted. "That's why they're killing this guy? They don't like his education policies?"

Erwin shook his head. "Mayor Dawk has a history of accepting bribes, making false promises, and lying about his legislation. I believe the Ackermans want to get rid of his corrupted influence. Subdue them."

"Sir," Eren began, glancing between the spread and the Chief. "Shouldn't we send more manpower? Eight people hasn't been enough to catch them before, and it won't be enough now."

"Are you doubting the ability of your team?"

"No. But sir, the Ackermans are the best killers we've ever encountered, we should be using all of our officers to catch them!"

Erwin narrowed his gaze, folding his hands beneath his chin. "We have other cases to attend to. We don't have the option of sending everyone." Eren tried to counter, but Erwin raised his hand to cut him off. The argument was routine; Erwin wasn't going to budge. "No more of this, Jaeger. You have criminals to catch."

"Yes, sir."

Without saying anything else, Erwin stood from the table and left the room.

Eren re-read the paper slowly. "This says the conference starts in an hour." He grumbled, crumpling up the paper in his fist. It didn't tell them anything new, none of their presentations or spreadsheets had any new info. They were at a standstill with the Ackermans, as they had been since the criminals first appeared in the city eight months ago; as the country had been for almost five years. He looked down to Annie. "We should get going."

She nodded, leaving the conference room quickly, the other officers, the "Elites" as some had come to call them, following after her. The Elites consisted of eight officers- Eren Jaeger, Annie Leonhardt, Jean Kirstein, Connie Springer, Sasha Braus, Ymir, Reiner Braun, and Bertholdt Fubar; all of whom graduated the academy a little less than five years ago, and had been handpicked by Erwin when the Ackermans first showed up in Manhattan. They were said to be the best, yet they'd accomplished nothing, and Mikasa and Levi were no closer to being apprehended.

Jean paused at the head of the table, quickly shutting down Erwin's laptop before facing Eren. "Why do you still fight the Chief about this?"

Eren sighed, running a hand through his hair. "The Ackermans have been taking out political leaders across the country for almost five years. The FBI has no leads," Eren scoffed, kicking his toe at the linoleum floor. "What kind of a strategy is constantly using anonymous tips and hoping you get there on time, anyway? If anyone gave a little more of a shit about this-"

"Everyone wants the Ackermans behind bars, Jaeger."

"Well they're doing a shitty job of showing it."

Jean rolled his eyes. "Shut the fuck up. We've got a mission to complete."

Eren grunted a curse as he followed Jean from the room, both men pausing at their desks to collect their badges and cell phones before making their way to the parking lot and respective squad cars. Eren was still muttering under his breath when he slipped into the driver's seat of his car. Annie had her feet propped on the dashboard, a cup of coffee held between her fingers.

"I want real coffee," She said lazily, dropping the styrofoam into the cupholder.

"After we catch the Ackermans." Eren started the car. "Or improve the force," he added after a moment.

Annie sighed, slumping into her seat as Eren began to drive. "I'll never get a decent coffee."

He parked next to City Hall, stuffing the keys into his pocket as he and Annie slowly made their way to the building. In less than an hour, Mayor Dawk would be giving his speech on the steps of the building; they had to find the vantage point. As usual, Eren and Annie were the first ones to arrive at an Ackerman scene, and as soon as they entered the building they drew their weapons, splitting up without a word. She would take the lower levels, he the higher, and they would meet back in the lobby.

Keeping his gun pointed to the floor below him, Eren stalked his way through the dimly lit hallway, looking for any sign of Levi or Mikasa Ackerman. They were known for their stealth- there was a reason only one picture of each existed. For all the department knew, their hits could have begun more than five years ago, when they took out the President and quickly became the most wanted criminals in the country, but it was that crime that had thrust them into the spotlight, that had spurred Eren into dropping out of college to join the police academy at 19; much to his mother's disdain.

After assassinating the President, it became clear that Levi and Mikasa were targeting high-ranking political figures, and more importantly, corrupt, lying political figures. Eren could almost admire them for getting rid of the corruption; if their methods weren't murder, of course. Reports and records showed the duo traveling the entire country, taking out leaders and politicians and moving on to the next city before any police force could think about getting close to them. The longest they had stayed in a city was Chicago for two months. But they'd been in New York City for almost eight months.

Eren slowly brought his weapon to his chest when he reached the threshold to another room, scanning the room slowly. If only the Chief would fucking listen to Eren, then he could have a whole team behind him, dozens of officers ready to actually take on the Ackermans and take the fucking job seriously. They would never catch the duo if no one fucking tried.

He was just about to turn into a new hallway when something hit square against his forearm and knocked his gun to the ground. An elbow slammed roughly into his midsection, but before he could buckle in pain, Eren was shoved gracelessly against the wall, a forearm digging into his neck and a finger curled into his belt loop.

"Eren." His assailant breathed, and he finally opened his eyes.

Mikasa Ackerman stared back at him, her cold, stormy gray eyes calculating as she studied him. His hands fell to grip her waist and before he could respond, Mikasa closed her lips over his, removing her forearm from his neck to thread her fingers through his hair. Eren sighed against her lips, tilting his head over hers to deepen their kiss as he pulled her flush against him. He felt her lips curl up against his, one of her legs lifting to hook over his hip, and he followed suit.

He ran his hands down her hips to her thighs, lifting her just as Mikasa jumped, wrapping her legs tightly around his waist and forcing a strangled groan from his lips. Eren whirled to press her against the wall she'd previously pinned him against, using the support to run his hands back up her body as she gripped his collar, dipping her head to run her tongue against his neck and collarbone, tightening her legs around his waist as he shivered against her.

Mikasa kissed her way back up his neck, nipping at his jaw and bottom lip before pulling back and resting her head on the wall behind her, between his fisted hands, a sly grin on her lips.

"Mikasa," Eren groaned, touching his forehead to hers.

She stroked her lithe fingers through his hair. "It's been a while," she said quietly.

The last assassination had been almost three weeks ago, when the Ackermans took out he highest-ranking CEO in the city, surprising everyone when they deviated from their usual norm. Eren remembered that night clearly; he and the rest of the Elites had had split up to try and find the criminals before they escaped. Mikasa had found him first, curled her hand around his arm to tug him into a nearby supply closet and kiss him, drag her hips against his as he grasped her hair, used her shoulder and neck to muffle his pleasured cries. She'd slipped away from him before Eren could ask what the fuck they were doing, meeting Levi somewhere and leaving him restless and satisfied- and the police force with another dead body and even fewer answers.

Mikasa pulled back, kissing the underside of his jaw and he tightened his grip on her thighs, suddenly hyperaware that Levi was somewhere in this building. That Annie and the other officers were stalking the halls, trying to find and apprehend the killer in his arms. God he was fucked.

"Eren stop." He blinked at the wall beside her head, slowly refocusing on her pretty face- briefly noting the small, fresh scar beneath her right eye. Every sensible part of him screamed to put her down, arrest her, or even just run away, but Mikasa was twisting her fingers into his hair again, making him look at her. "I know what you're thinking."

"Then give me a proper answer," Eren said bitterly, grasping a strand of her inky hair. Her gaze narrowed, and he knew the topic was already dropped. Mikasa wouldn't give him an answer, an explanation, a label; she hadn't seven months ago and she sure as hell wouldn't now. "Mikasa," he tried again, but she shook her head.

"Levi isn't in here," she said after a long moment.

Eren sighed, frustrated and confused and pretty turned on. "We got the vantage point wrong."

Mikasa nodded, eyes betraying no emotion towards the crime about to be committed. "Still using anonymous tips?" Eren grumbled a confirmation. "You think Smith would learn. Tips don't work."

"I'm here, aren't I? Sometimes tips can be helpful."

"Sometimes." Mikasa emphasized, raking his hair back and sending pleasant shivers across his body. "There was a tip about our hit on the previous Vice President, but he's still dead. Chicago was the smartest city, got pretty close by singling out the corrupted and predicting our movements. I thought for sure Erwin Smith would be three steps ahead; Levi spoke highly of him on our way here."

"You shouldn't be telling me this." Eren said weakly, but he already knew that no matter how much information Mikasa gave him, it wouldn't be enough to stop her. Hell, she could probably tell him the exact whereabouts, time, and victim of their next crime and no one on the force would take it seriously. "I'm disappointed," Mikasa said, pursing her lips. "Levi was almost nervous about hitting this city. Apparently he knew Erwin in school, and yet Erwin hasn't even tried to find him."

Eren really, really didn't want to talk about how shitty the police force was, so he dropped his head to kiss her again, cutting off whatever she'd begun to say next. "You're talking a lot today," he said once they'd broken apart. Mikasa shrugged, running her fingers over the buttons of his jacket. His stomach sank. "Is this another distraction?"

Mikasa shook her head slowly, letting out a heavy sigh. "Not… entirely."

"Mikasa-"

"Quit making out with your shitty boyfriend. We need to fucking leave."

Mikasa groaned, a low sound in the back of her throat, glaring over his shoulder as Eren let her down, feeling a hollow dread begin to settle throughout his bones. "He's not my boyfriend," Mikasa said quietly, crossing her arms over her chest. In any other situation, Eren could have laughed at her tiny pout, but he didn't know that voice and Mikasa's reaction was telling him exactly who was standing behind him.

"Everything's set up," Levi Ackerman said as Eren turned. "We need to go." Levi looked older than the picture suggested, the heavy bags under his eyes and the downturned mouth made him look tired and angry and bored. Where Mikasa looked like a normal woman, Levi actually looked like a fucking serial killer. A serial killer appraising him with cold, dead eyes.

To our knowledge, Erwin's voice from their first meeting on the Ackermans fled through his mind, both Mikasa and Levi know over thirty ways to kill a person without leaving a trace. They just choose to use the sniper guns.

He was so fucked.

Mikasa tugged on Eren's sleeve before stepping away from him to join her partner. Levi whispered something to her, and she shook her head, glancing back to Eren without a word.

"Wait!" Eren called before they disappeared from the room. Levi and Mikasa paused, staring back at him with an eerily similar gaze. "That's how you've been doing it? Setting something up and leaving before the actual death?"

"Sometimes," Levi said slowly. "Except Dawk is dead, I set up a distraction for the rest of your pathetic force. Don't you think we tire of the same old thing?"

Eren checked his watch quickly. "The Mayor's conference doesn't start for five more minutes!"

"And he's dead right inside the doorway. Might want to get him before he starts to smell." Mikasa rolled her eyes, following Levi from the room.

Eren bent to pick up his gun slowly, his eyes still trained on Mikasa and Levi's retreating figures. Neither spared him a glance as they turned to one of the windows, slipping through and closing the screen- and it was suddenly as if they were never there to begin with. There were so many things he should have done, so many things he should be doing right now to send his team after them. Instead he sighed, holstering his weapon and heading back to the lobby.

Annie was waiting for him behind a receptionist's desk, idly lining up supplies. She looked up when he slammed the door behind him. "What took you so long?"

"Ambushed," he muttered, raking a hand through his hair as his cell phone began to ring; a call from Sasha.

"Eren," Sasha said, voice sounding very distant. "We found something on the steps of City Hall, something that wasn't there during the preliminary search. We're heading to the building across the street, we think the Ackermans-"

"Don't bother," Eren interrupted. "It's a distraction. Dawk's already dead. Levi Ackerman set a fucking distraction." He gestured to the front door, and Annie stood, jogging to catch up with him.

Eren heard Sasha repeat his message to the rest of the group.

There was muffled cursing on her end and a string of static before Jean barked into the phone, "What the fuck are you talking about, Jaeger? How do you know this for sure?"

Eren pushed open the double doors of the entryway he and Annie passed through less than an hour ago. "The Ackermans ambushed me," he said slowly, hanging up his phone before Jean could yell at him more. On the ground, just inside the doors to the steps outside, Nile Dawk lay splayed out before them, a single bullet hole in the center of his head, a trail of blood dripping down his coat and onto the floor.

Annie knelt beside the mayor, pressing two fingers to his neck. "Yeah," she sighed, glancing at Eren. "He's dead."

* * *

><p>Erwin had not been pleased about the lack of results, and had been even more upset about Eren getting ambushed and letting the criminals get away. But he still didn't listen when Eren told him that a few changes to their current plans could have the Ackermans finally behind bars.<p>

"Are you even fucking trying?" Eren had yelled the day after Dawk's death, his fists clenched atop the conference table.

Erwin had fixed him with a dark stare. "I don't need to remind you of our policies concerning insubordination, do I?"

"No, sir." Eren had muttered, saluting quickly wh Erwin disappeared with Hanji, their coroner, to inspect the body for any clues. There wouldn't be. There never was.

Eren huffed childishly, throwing his arm over his knee and leaning his head against the wall. It had only been two days since then, and they were already following another tip. It was finally clear to Eren; the New York police wouldn't do more than follow tips and hope to somehow catch the Ackermans in time.

"This is ridiculous," Eren said, stuffing his phone back into his pocket. Annie, along with the other Elites, was investigating the hotel where Senator Dot Pixis, a notorious Moonshine smuggler, was staying for the weekend, where an anonymous person claimed the Ackermans would attack.

"And here I thought New York would actually pose a threat," Mikasa said from where she sat across from him, a taunting lilt to her voice. They were in the alley directly across from where Pixis was staying, hidden in the shadows of the two buildings while their respective teams were at work. She nudged his foot with her own. "Maybe I should call in a tip."

"Maybe you should," Eren snorted, curling his fingers into a fist. "Wouldn't make much of a difference."

"No, I suppose not." She trailed her fingers over the pebbles littering the ground. "Shame."

"I could arrest you right now," Eren murmured, closing his eyes. "I could have arrested you seven months ago."

Mikasa laughed quietly, but not unkindly. "But you didn't. And you don't know how I fight. Honestly, Eren, do you think you could take Levi or I on alone?"

Eren exhaled sharply, cracking his knuckles with a practiced ease as an old memory surfaced, the memory of the first day Mikasa had kissed him. He'd been stationed outside of Wall Street, where Erwin had sent the Elites several times in the first few months after the Ackermans appeared in the city. He'd caught sight of her as she ducked into an alley, and Eren had given chase, following her into an abandoned building and cornering her. (It occurred to him a few days later that she had let him follow her.) She'd knocked his weapon and phone away before he stopped her, but instead of fighting him off, Mikasa kissed him harshly, distracting Eren from his ringing phone, from the plan, from everything. Of course, Mikasa had knocked him out moments later, and he'd been found by Connie after a few hours, after Mikasa and Levi killed the governor. He'd never expected to see her again months later, to kiss her again, for their… relationship to spiral into what it had become.

"Eren."

Mikasa was tucking her phone back into her pocket, standing before him and holding her hand out with an unreadable expression. Eren frowned, locking his fingers with hers as he stood. "Something wrong?"

"No," she said too quickly, looking away. "Levi sent me my position."

His phone rang in his pocket, Jean's dumb ringtone slicing through in he alley. The rest of the team was either onto something, or they were leaving. Or Pixis was already dead. "Go then. You don't want to keep Levi waiting right?"

Mikasa worried her bottom lip, glancing around the alleyway with dull eyes. "Eren…" She pulled his hand, still clasped in hers, around her waist, placing her free hand on the back of his neck. He brushed a few strands of hair away from her eyes.

"Mikasa?" She sighed, and Eren felt his heart pound. She never stayed longer than necessary, never looked nervous or unsure of what was to come. There had to be something wrong, and despite the situation, Eren was terrified she was ending it all. "What is it?"

"We're leaving."

His chest clenched, tongue heavy as the gravity of Mikasa's words sank in. "You're-?"

She continued, finally looking up to him with a sort of urgency in her gaze he'd never seen before. "We've been in the city for too long. Our faces are known throughout the country now, we can't stay here any longer. Levi says we have family out in Japan, we'll go stay with them. He hasn't said if we'll continue… this."

"No one's even come close to finding you!"

"We can't risk it, Eren." Mikasa said, curling her fingers into his collar with a long intake. "Come with us."

"…What?"

Her fingers danced across his jaw, the pads of her fingers burning his skin. "Levi's asked Petra to come along. He says we can't lose our greatest hacker," she laughed quietly. So that's how they stayed off the radar. "I think he can't bear to let go of someone precious."

Someone precious. "Mikasa… Leaving with you… I don't even know you. You could-"

"Be a serial killer?" She interrupted dully.

Eren grimaced. "You know that's not… what I meant. I've been here for my entire life, I don't know if I can drop everything to follow a couple of killers to Japan."

"I understand, Eren. I-" She shook her head, unspoken words falling between them like icy rain. Eren wasn't sure what he was looking for; for Mikasa to tell him not to come, for her to tell him she wanted him to come, or maybe a different situation entirely- where Mikasa's arrest and death weren't wanted by the entirety of the country, and they could try this thing out normally. "I need to go."

"Mikasa-"

"I need to get into position." She ran her fingers down his neck again, eliciting a small shiver from him. Winding out of his arms, Mikasa jogged to the end of the alley opposite the building where Pixis would be, to dig into the duffel bag she'd brought, producing a grappling hook. Eren felt his stomach drop. "We're leaving next week, after our next hit. Eren… do you trust me?"

Did he trust her? Mikasa was one of the most notorious criminals in the world, she'd been trained by Levi- who's criminal record allegedly stemmed all the way back to his early teenage years- but she'd never once lied to him. she never gave him false information, never pretended what they were doing was anything less than fucked up. Mikasa never pretended she was someone else.

She'd never lied to him, but she'd killed dozens of people.

Lying, corrupt people who used their political influence to ruin the lives of the lower classes, but people nonetheless.

"I don't know."

Mikasa nodded, as if she expected his answer. "I'll find you and tell you the plan at the next hit. You can back out if you want." She re-zipped the duffel, tossing it to the end of the alley where Levi would probably retrieve it. She turned to face him again, frowning. "Just… be careful, okay?"

He surprised himself by saying, "you, too." Mikasa turned from him, sprinting out of the alley.

Eren waited until he was sure she would be gone to duck out of the alley and peer around, spotting her on top of one of the buildings they'd sat watched her until she ran to the other end of the building, where Levi had probably set up her gun- the gun that would momentarily have Pixis in its sights. The rest of the block was deserted, purposefully cleared while the Ackermans and Pixis were nearby.

In his pocket, his phone began to ring with a call from Ymir. As he answered, a figure stepped out of the building next to Eren, wandering to the duffel bag Mikasa had abandoned and checking the contents before slinging it over his shoulder. Eren's breath caught in his throat.

"Look, kid," Levi began, pulling a cigarette from one of his pockets. Eren dropped his hand, covering the mouthpiece on his phone. Ymir would chew him out later for ignoring her on a case, but she couldn't hear this. Levi leaned against the wall, exhaling his drag to the air above him. "For some reason, the brat cares about you. I don't give a fuck if you tag along, but if you hurt her," he focused his steel gaze on Eren, narrowing his eyes. Eren swallowed, glancing to the pistol secured in the waistband of Levi's trousers. "I'll kill you."

From the opposite side of the building, a single gunshot split the stillness.

The screaming began as his phone rang again and Levi disappeared into a building- his burning cigarette the only proof he'd been there at all.

* * *

><p>"So you're moving to Japan."<p>

Eren shrugged, groaning into his arms. He heard Armin drop his tools and sink into the chair beside him, tapping his knuckles on the back of Eren's head until Eren lifted it from the pillow of his arms, glaring at his friend. Armin grinned, leaning over a clipboard to write out whatever he'd found on Pixis's corpse.

"Where's Hanji?" Eren asked, looking anywhere but at the corpse in the center of the room.

Armin nodded toward the door. "With Erwin. They said something about convincing him of a new tactic to stop the Ackermans." He paused, twirling the pen between two fingers. "Won't do any good if they're leaving, though."

Eren made a face. "Find anything on Pixis?" He'd avoid this conversation for as long as he could.

"No," Armin sighed, tossing his pen onto the desk. "One bullet through the head. Same as everyone else the Ackermans have sent in. Eren-"

"I know." He slumped in his chair, staring at the ceiling.

"What are you going to do?"

"I don't know."

"Will you go to Japan with them?"

"I don't know, man."

Armin groaned. "You said Mikasa told you their last hit would be sometime this week, right? You only have a few days to make a decision."

"I know."

"Eren." Armin's voice dropped low with warning. He took the file on Pixis and stuffed it into a manilla folder for Hanji to check over before grasping the arm of Eren's chair, forcing Eren to stop spinning.

Eren dropped his head, pouting. "What do you want me to say, man? I have no fucking clue what to do. There," he reached for one of the rubber bands littering Armin's desk. "Happy?"

Armin was silent for a moment, staring intently at the door. "You like Mikasa right?"

"Yes."

"Do you like her enough to end this life?"

Eren stretched the rubber band over all of his fingers, twisting it a few extra times around his pinky. "I don't know. Maybe?"

"If you follow her to Japan," Armin began, fiddling with his pen again- a habit he'd had since high school. "Eren Jaeger will disappear. You'll have to go into hiding with them, and you'll probably only be able to see your friends and family once or twice. To let them know you're alive." He paused, his hard gaze boring straight into Eren's, demanding an answer Eren couldn't give. "But if you don't go with them, you'll never see Mikasa again. Which are you willing to give up?"

Eren didn't want to leave his family, desert his mom and dad outside the city, or Armin, or the rest of his team. He'd been with them for years, known Armin for almost his entire life. He'd lose it all if he left the country, disappeared from their lives, and- as Armin said- there was a very real chance he would never see the people he cared about again.

But would it be worth it to stay here? His dream to rid the country of the Ackermans, to make a huge difference on the force, was slipping away, and he was rapidly learning how unwilling his department was to accomplish their goals. He'd… fallen somehow for Mikasa, would it really be awful for him to leave with her? The last time they saw each other, Mikasa told him she wasn't sure if she and Levi would continue killing after leaving.

He didn't want to leave his home, but he didn't want to lose Mikasa.

"Look," Armin said when it became clear that Eren wouldn't answer. "Remember back in high school, when I went to those STEM summer camps?" Eren nodded and he continued, balancing the pen on his knuckles and yanking the rubber band away from Eren's fingers- his pinky had turned purple. "I met Mikasa at them, before she lived with Levi. She's one of the smartest people I've ever met, and I believe she's only doing this because it's necessary. She had to stay alive after her parents were killed, and killing with Levi was what it took. I don't think she wants this anymore." Armin stood, dropping the pen to the table and clasping a hand on Eren's shoulder. Eren felt his stomach clench. "I think a future with you is what she wants."

"Armin…"

"Whatever you choose, Eren, make sure it's what you want. Don't make your decision for anyone else, and don't let anyone else choose for you." He left the room, leaving Eren alone with a looming Elites meeting, a corpse, and a decision he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to make.

* * *

><p>Eren checked his phone for the tenth time since parking the car outside of the Met, looking for the confirmation to swarm the building. Annie sat beside him, wringing her hands around her coffee cup as she kicked her feet onto the dash with a low groan. She hated stake-outs more than anyone Eren knew.<p>

Early that evening, Erwin had received a tip that the Ackermans would be attacking Rod Reiss, a governor well known for an affair he'd had years ago, and the subsequent bribes he'd participated in to keep it secret, who was visiting the city with his children. Ymir had been extremely vocal, demanding they take the offensive for once, but Erwin refused, especially because they did not know for sure if the Ackermans would attack. Or if any of them would be at the Met tonight. They'd only gotten a tip. The entire night was a guessing game.

Eren's nerves were on fire- this could be his last night in this city, or the last time he ever sees Mikasa. He still hadn't come up with an answer, what he would do or say when he encountered her again. Part of him hoped it was a fluke, that he had another day or two, and another part hoped the situation would become so dire that his decision would be made for him.

After another hour, Annie broke the silence. "Make a decision yet?"

"Huh?"

Annie's smile was tiny, but he saw it in the curl at the corner of her lips. "Whether or not you'll leave with Mikasa." "How…?" Eren shook his head with an amused laugh. "How'd you know?"

"Please. You're one of the best cops I've seen; there's no way you'd let the Ackermans continue to surprise you, or let them get away after the first time." She crossed her legs, propping her hands on her stomach as she stared out the windshield, the glare of a nearby streetlight plunging her face in darkness. "Plus, the number of hits has dramatically decreased. They've run out of targets, we've got them on file, it's time to get out or get caught. And I'm betting neither wants to get caught."

"I don't know what to do," Eren confessed, slumping in his seat. The headlights were directed at the front of the art museum, the car in position for both of them to jump and apprehend anyone who tried to get in or out- but there'd been no movement for upwards of two hours. He was beginning to wonder if anything at all would happen tonight.

Annie shrugged, tapping her deceptively delicate fingers against her arm. "Do whatever the hell you want. Want to get lucky with a killer for the rest of your life? Go for it. Want to stay and work for a force that hasn't been at its prime for almost ten years? Do it. But whatever you do," she turned to him, icy eyes narrowing imperceptibly. "Don't regret it. I knew Mikasa in high school-"

"-did everyone fucking know her?"

"Once she's gone, Eren, she's gone for good."

"I figured," Eren sighed. "I'm so fucked."

"Yeah," Annie grinned, lips curling over her teeth, "you are. I'll miss you, though," she continued after a moment. "My first partner never got me coffee."

"I knew you liked me."

The radio on the dashboard burst to life, static echoing through the car, startling both of them and making Eren bolt straight up. Annie's fingers immediately moved to her gun- their team only called on the radio when there wasn't time for a phone.

"Eren, Annie," Ymir barked, voices screaming behind her. "We've got movement inside. Second floor. Get in there and apprehend the Ackermans- keep them and anyone else inside alive."

"Let's go." Eren secured his gun, dropping the keys into his pocket. Annie was already out of the car, running up the sidewalk to the front steps when Eren caught up to her, both ascending the stairs quickly.

Annie kicked open the door, glass shards and wood from the doorframe falling to the floor behind them as they quickly scanned the room. Eren stayed close to the wall, checking behind desks and podiums, keeping Annie in his peripheral.

"Clear," Annie said, joining back at his side. "Keep an eye out for any security guards."

"Right. You go through the hall with the lights, the Ackermans probably moved through there already. I'll take the dark hall."

"Be careful."

"You, too."

Eren pulled the door open, cringing at the loud creak of the hinges. He propped the door with a stopper to avoid more noise, holding the gun securely against his chest as he observed each room he passed. He didn't see anyone- the exhibits were as empty as the lobby- but by the third or fourth room, Eren realized something was wrong. He ducked into the next room, checking for anyone before holstering his weapon.

He kneeled by a case of pottery pieces, and he knew. The alarms had been turned off- there were no sirens or alarms blaring to alert the police of his intrusion. But if Mikasa and Levi were planning to kill Reiss in the museum, why would they disable the alarms in the exhibits? Unless they were planning for a chase, but Eren knew they were smart and capable enough to avoid one.

Shaking his head, Eren took his weapon again, holding it at his side as he turned back to the door- just as a figure darted past. Eren ran to the door, but like a ghost, the figure couldn't be seen.

"Shit," he whispered, just before his phone beeped. He pulled it to his ear, ignoring the panic beginning to curl in his gut, to freeze his bones and send terrible thoughts streaming through his mind. "Yeah?"

"This section's clear," Annie answered quickly, sounding out of breath.

"Over here, too. I'll head to the second floor."

"Don't bother, Ymir and the others are up there. Get to the third floor. We'll regroup there." She stopped, and Eren expected the connection to end, but Annie spoke again, a near silent whisper into his ear. "Have you seen them?"

"No," Eren said, his heart beating unsteadily in his chest. There was obviously someone inside- he wasn't sure whether he would be relieved or disappointed if it wasn't Mikasa.

"Me neither." The call ended, and again he was left in the silence.

He passed the door to the second floor, climbing the remaining stairs and keeping constant watch of the hallway- he couldn't get surprised by whomever was in the building. He couldn't lose his life.

Eren drew his gun again and pushed through the door, glancing around the room with bated breath. He heard nothing- no footsteps from his team downstairs, no movement or voices from who they were chasing, only the eerily still silence and his frantic heartbeat to match the clack of his shoes on the tiled floor. Moving through the exhibits, Eren checked every closed and opened door, double checking each hallway before moving on, but again and again, he saw nothing.

Coming up on the last exhibit in the museum, Eren pulled his phone from his pocket, holding his gun at his side. He was beginning to think this was a mistake, deploying the team in the museum- if there was something happening tonight, they would have found it by now. They hadn't seen Mikasa or Levi, or someone the duo would be targeting. It was a pointless mission, one they should end now and regroup back at the police station..

"Eren?"

He whirled, dropping his phone and pulling his gun, swallowing a scream as he turned to face the intruder, his finger dancing near the trigger. Mikasa stood before him, her body drenched in the shadow of one flickering light, her hands raised before her chest and gaze trained on the gun he pointed at her head.

Eren lowered his gun, glancing around the room for her partner- but there was no one else in sight. He felt something akin to relief flood his body, a sort of calm to quiet the dread that had gnawed his insides for the past week. "Mikasa-"

"What are you doing here?" She stalked forward, out of the shadows, searching the room quickly before stopping nearly a foot away from him. Not exactly what he was expecting.

"What are you talking about? Isn't this your final hit?"

"No…?" Mikasa kicked at his phone, sending it spinning into the wall. "Who would we kill in a museum in the middle of the night?"

Eren frowned, flexing his grip on his gun. "Reiss…?"

"Reiss?" Mikasa repeated, tilting her head. "That moron? Please, he doesn't need our help to ruin his life."

"But you said-"

"Eren," she interrupted, crossing her arms over her chest as frustration snaked its way onto her features. "It was tomorrow. Levi wanted to take Erwin out at his press conference. Your entire team's here?" He nodded. "Great."

"Why Erwin?" Eren flicked the safety on his gun.

"Levi still hates him from high school, or something. I don't care." She shrugged off her pack, digging through the contents quickly before cursing and pulling it back onto her shoulders with a bitter laugh. "Bastard took my gun."

She spun on her heel, walking silently to the door Eren had recently entered through. "Wait, Mikasa." She stopped just before the door, turning back to him. "If this isn't a hit, why are you here?"

Mikasa looked away, and if Eren hadn't known her as long, hadn't spent hours with her in abandoned alleys and buildings, he would have missed the hint of sheepishness in her eyes, the way she tugged her bottom lip between her teeth. Was she… embarrassed? "Arsonists," she said quietly. "We followed a couple of them here, stopped them from attacking this place."

"You two stopped arsonists?" Eren asked, biting back a smile.

She glared at him. "It was Levi's idea, actually. A way to… give back, after everything we've taken. After all the lives we've ruined. " Mikasa stepped away from the door, letting her fingers drag across the wall as she walked. Her voice had gotten quiet, sad almost, as she spoke. "We can't change what we've done, who we killed. We can never be normal."

"Normalcy's overrated," Eren whispered, tucking his gun into the waistband of his uniform. He stood behind her, dropping one hand to cup her hip. She stood in front of one of Vincent van Gogh's paintings- Irises, her fingers barely touching the frame.

Mikasa placed her hand over his, linking their fingers and squeezing- her head bowed as her shoulders hunched. "Not to me."

Standing rigid in his arms as the memory of dozens of kills no doubt flooded her mind, Mikasa was silent. Eren moved closer, his arm curling around her waist to pull her closer, but she still did not relax.

He wasn't sure when it happened, but Eren knew he loved Mikasa, in some way, somehow. Despite her dark past, her actions, and the bounty on her head, he wanted her to be safe- to get a chance at the normal life she so desperately craved; the normal life tragedy long ago ripped away from her.

"Have I ever told you that I paint?" Mikasa asked after the heaviness began to make her squirm. She stepped out of his embrace, but left her hand held held securely in his.

"No."

A faint smile pulled at her lips. "I'll show you sometime." She quickly sobered, squaring her shoulders with a heavy breath. "If you come with us, Eren, you can't be normal either."

"I know."

"Have you…?"

"Yes," he squeezed her hand, nodding slowly. "I have."

Muffled voices from just outside the door startled them apart. Mikasa immediately reached for her pack as the sound of footsteps got louder and closer, groaning in frustration after remembering Levi had her gun. "Eren-"

"Yeah," he said, making a face. "It's my team. We're meeting up here to plan what to do next." He could almost make out the voices from behind the door he'd entered through, Jean and maybe Sasha arguing about something. Mikasa would be gone in a moment, and his team would come up empty handed, return to the station with no good news for Erwin, and-

"Give me your gun."

"What?" Eren glanced over his shoulder, but Mikasa moved him swiftly, twisting his arm behind his back and taking his gun with her free hand. She kicked at the back of his knees, knocking him to the ground below her. "What the fuck are you doing?" He hissed as she pressed the cool metal of the barrel to his temple.

She exhaled sharply, breathing uneasily above him as she twisted his arm again. "I'm sorry," she whispered as the door burst open and the Elites swept through into the room, guns leveled at Mikasa.

"Ackerman." Reiner said. "Let him go."

"Drop your weapons." Mikasa ordered, her voice- the dead, emotionless one Eren had come to associate with her assassin persona- echoed in the hollow emptiness. When no one moved, Mikasa pressed the gun even harder against Eren's head. "I said drop them!"

"Guys, just do what she says." Eren begged, quickly picking up on Mikasa's game.

A long moment of silence followed and then Annie sighed, lifting her gun in one hand- the other up in a surrender- and placed it on the ground. The others followed suit, Jean the last to comply after Ymir elbowed him in the stomach.

"Ackerman," Annie sighed. "Good to see you again."

Eren could picture the wicked smirk on Mikasa's lips. "Same to you, Leonhardt. Now, kick your weapons over." They did, the guns landing both in front of and behind Mikasa and Eren. "No one has to get hurt-"

"This is your idea of leaving?"

Ymir lunged for her gun, but Mikasa promptly trained hers on Ymir, forcing her to stop. Eren risked a glance- knowing full well that Mikasa would not shoot him unless absolutely necessary- to see Levi standing in the other doorway, a pack similar to Mikasa's donning his back and a machine gun slung over it. Mikasa groaned.

"I thought you were waiting outside," she groused.

"I was," Levi said, stepping into the room. Ymir was still halfway to her gun until Levi paced over, kicking the guns away from Eren's team so that they passed Mikasa. "Until one of those idiot arsonists admitted there was a bomb."

"A bomb?" Jean snarled, taking a large step forward. Mikasa turned the gun on him. "Why the fuck are we here, then? We should be-"

"I disabled it," Levi interrupted coldly, taking his place next to Mikasa, crossing his arms over his chest as he appraised the police department's finest. Eren sighed, glancing at Levi and shifting slightly in the loosening hold Mikasa had him in; they'd never had a chance of beating the Ackermans. Even now, with no planned kill and several officers to two killers, they were still on the defensive.

He was glad he was getting out.

"Or maybe," Levi continued, his dull voice echoing through the room. "It's on the first floor, with the original timer still set to go off in less than five minutes."

Mikasa's gasp was the loudest in the room. She glared at her partner, her nails biting severely into Eren's forearm. "Levi-"

"Relax." His gaze did not falter from the officers. "It's in the lobby, it won't ruin any art."

Her grip loosened with her relief until she pulled Eren back to his feet, pressing the barrel of the gun to his throat. "We'll be taking our leave, now." She said. "Disable the bomb or don't, but don't forget about the arsonists down there."

Levi absentmindedly picked up a few guns from the floor. "I'd say you have about four minutes left."

"Mikasa," Annie began-

A shot rang through the room.

Eren crumpled, his hands quickly falling to his calf- to the blood steadily streaming from where Mikasa had shot him. Before he could blink, she slammed her elbow against his temple- briefly disrupting his vision. Someone screamed, and his team was rushing for their weapons as Eren lay, mouth agape as blood quickly coated his hands and darkened his pants. His head spun- questions skirting through his head as pain licked up and down his leg and bloomed across his head.

"I'm sorry." He barely heard her, barely registered Levi leading Mikasa from the room by her elbow as someone shot at them in their retreat.

She had to do it. It had to be convincing- someone had to get hurt to avoid suspicion. She'd hit the side of his leg on purpose, there was so much blood- spilling from between his fingers, trickling down his leg and making his head spin. Mikasa was stronger than that- she could have knocked him out if she wanted. She could have killed him.

"Eren. Eren! Can you hear me?" Hands cupped his face- he could tell that much- lifting his head from the ground. Hands checked his forehead, an extra pair tying cloth around his leg. "Jean, forget them! We need to get out of here before that bomb goes off!"

"Sasha?" Eren whispered. His leg stung.

Sasha's warm face crowded his vision, her worried expression the only thing he could focus on. "Can you stand?"

He nodded, putting all of his weight on his good leg, but stumbled as soon as he tried to take a step. Sasha caught him, tugging his arm around her shoulders to keep him upright. "Ymir! Quit firing, we need to go!" Ymir cursed, leaving her post at the window to take Eren's other arm.

His head rolled against his shoulder, much too heavy for him to keep up as Sasha and Ymir all but carried his down the stairs. "Ymir," he slurred, and she hissed at him to be quiet, but he had to let her know. "They weren't after Reiss. He's safe… his kids are safe."

Ymir was quiet as she and Sasha struggled to get him through the door to the second floor staircase. He heard Jean and Annie arguing somewhere below them- about disarming the bomb? "Shut up, Eren." She said, "just shut up and survive this."

When they reached the lobby, Eren could barely make out the team around the bomb, which was beeping steadily, the display showing a number Eren couldn't read- fuck his head hurt.

"We need to disarm it!" Jean yelled, reaching for the bomb.

"I told you," Annie snarled desperately, swatting his hands away. "Levi fucked with the wires, none of them match up. Our only option is to leave, to make sure everyone survives."

"And leave the lobby in ruins?" He spit.

"Which matters most to you- a lobby or your life?"

"Fuck you two," Ymir interrupted angrily. "Annie, how much time's left on that thing?"

"Thirty seconds."

Reiner grabbed Jean's wrist, pulling him away from the bomb. "There's no time. We need to get Eren to a hospital and take the arsonists."

Jean wrenched his hand away, following Reiner and Connie to the front steps with a bitter snarl of, "fuck the Ackermans."

"Ymir, let's go." Sasha tightened Eren's arm around her shoulder, leading them to the steps, where the rest of the team was moving the arsonists away from the doors.

Eren's feet began to drag, his head dropping forward as his eyes shut. His leg burned, his head throbbing from where Mikasa had hit him- all he wanted was to sleep, to forget what had happened, to be anywhere but the steps of the museum.

"Don't fucking close your eyes, Eren." Ymir's voice kept him on the brink of consciousness, his feet thunking awkwardly against the stone.

The bomb began to beep even faster- Sasha cursed, and she and Ymir tried to speed up but it was no use with Eren as a deadweight between them, the others raced down the steps-

Eren heard the explosion before he felt it.

His body was thrown against the ground, into an uncomfortable heap with Ymir and Sasha as he buckled, scrapes and burns tearing at his back and arms- glass falling over them in a painful shower of wood and stone. He couldn't move, couldn't breathe, as Ymir tried her best to shield his body from the wreckage plummeting onto them- but that wasn't his blood dripping onto his cheeks.

Someone far away was screaming, wailing and shouting out orders, mixing with the ringing in Eren's ears as he choked out a cough. Eren's head was pounding, something heavy keeping his arm pinned to the ground, and one desperate look showed his arm twisted unnaturally under a wooden beam. The voices around him blurred together, both Ymir and Sasha's weight moving from atop him. They wanted him to speak, or wake up, he wasn't sure, everything was spinning around him as flames licked their way across the front doors. Sleep called to him, begged him to let go, to be rid of the pounding in his head, of the blood streaking from his arm and the tourniquet around his leg, of the fire threatening to consume everything around him.

Sirens rang in his head as his eyes finally closed, and the last thing he saw was two figures standing on the roof of the museum.

* * *

><p>"Hey… I think he's waking up."<p>

"Eren? Eren, it's Armin. Can you open your eyes?"

Eren groaned, trying to turn his head away from the light assaulting his eyelids. A steady beeping reached his ears and he recognized it from every visit with his dad, the starchy sheets covering his lower body, the flimsy pillow beneath his head- the IV stuck in his arm.

"At least we know he's alive."

"Shut up, Jean."

He opened his eyes, blinking fitfully at the vibrant fluorescent lighting. He'd hated it since he was a kid. Something squeezed his hand and he turned groggily to face Armin sitting close by, both of his hands cupped around Eren's, Jean and Sasha sitting on either side of him. "Armin?"

"Hey," Armin whispered, glancing to the machines that monitored Eren's heart rate. "How're you feeling?"

"Like I was shot," Eren groaned again, shifting to a more comfortable position on the bed. The pain in his leg had dulled to a distant throb. His arm felt stiff, thanks to the cast that was already adorned with signatures and a crude drawing. "And elbowed in the face."

"So exactly as you should, huh?"

He shot Armin a grateful smile. "Yeah." He froze, memories of the night flooding his mind- Sasha and Ymir had been the closest to the explosion with him, but one glance at Sasha, and the bandage wrapped around her forearm, briefly eased his mind. "Ymir-"

"She's okay," Sasha said, reaching to push the hair out of Eren's eyes. "She's getting coffee with the others."

Eren nodded. Dragging his dry tongue over his teeth, Eren slowly recalled everything that had happened before the bomb went off. It must have been a few days since, which meant that Mikasa and Levi were gone and Erwin- "Is Erwin alive?" He blurted, staring desperately at Armin.

"Yes." Armin tilted his heard, brow furrowing. "He was their next target, wasn't he?"

"Yeah," Eren said over Jean's cry of disbelief.

Armin dropped his hand, pulling his small backpack onto his lap. "Jean, Sasha, why don't you get Eren something to eat? It's been two days and I'm sure he's starving." They left with little fuss, Sasha finally convincing Jean to go after threatening to switch archery partners for a week. Armin continued digging into his pack before producing a thick white envelope- unaddressed and sealed.

"Mikasa left that?" Eren asked, pushing himself to a sitting position and ignoring the flare of pain in his leg. He lifted his sheet quickly- yup, his entire calf was wrapped in white bandages, obscuring the stitches surely done by his dad.

"Nailed to my front door," Armin shook his head with a small grin. "Be sure to thank her for scaring me in the dead of night."

"I will. What's in the envelope?"

Armin turned it over in his hands, running his finger over where it was sealed. "I don't know." He held up a piece of paper. "She told me to only let you open it."

"Sounds like her," Eren said fondly. "Gimme." He tore into the envelope, revealing one piece of paper and a ticket. Eren read over the paper quickly, his eyes glancing between it and the plane ticked in his palm.

"What's it say?" Armin asked, leaning around Eren's hand to see better.

"'Burn if you don't use it.'" Eren read, flipping it over to the back, where three names were printed boldly in the center of the page. Their new names. He folded the paper back into the envelope.

"Plane ticket?"

Eren chewed at his lip, nodding slowly. "Osaka, Japan. Flight leaves in exactly two weeks."

"You should be out of the hospital by then." Armin fiddled with the straps on his pack as Eren tucked the ticket back into the envelop. Armin sighed, deep and full of unspoken concerns, his still blue eyes boring into Eren's. "You're sure about this?"

"Yeah." Eren tapped his fingers against his IV idly. "Hey, Arm." Armin looked up- a thousand warnings flashing through his gaze. "Promise me something. Two months after I've gone, tell my mom and dad what happened. I dunno if I'll be coming back, and I don't want them to worry."

"I promise." Armin smiled sadly, reaching for Eren's hand again. "I'm going to miss you, Eren."

"I'll miss you, too, buddy." He curled his palm under Armin's linking their fingers as the sun set outside Eren's window.

When visiting hours ended, Eren gave Armin his official resignation from the police department to be handed in to Erwin early the next morning.

* * *

><p>Eren stopped just shy of the door to the inside of the airport, hoisting his carry on higher on his back and resting his weight on his good leg. His stitches were mostly healed, though they'd need to be taken out soon, but the area where a bullet had hit still ached when he walked for too long. At least he convinced his dad almost a week ago that he could manage with just a brace and no crutches. His arm was still in a sling, held securely to his chest.<p>

People streamed past him, exiting the gates to reunite with family and friends, to meet with bosses and business owners, speaking rapidly in languages that Eren did not yet understand- although he did recognize some Japanese phrases from a class he took in high school.

"Sir, are you alright?" A flight attendant spoke to him in English, touching his shoulder gently. "We're about to close the gate, did you forget something?"

"No, I'm fine," Eren insisted, offering a polite smile. He checked his phone again, unsure of what he was looking for since neither of them had the other's number, but quickly shut it off when he saw three missed calls from his mom.

Breathing deeply for courage, Eren pushed through the door and quickly made his way through families and friends to get to the opposite wall. No meeting place had been set up, but he knew them well enough by now-

Strong arms wrapped themselves around Eren's waist as a body collided with his, a well-known face pressing into his shoulder as Mikasa hurled herself into his embrace, wary of his broken arm. Eren smiled, clutching his good arm around her shoulders and burying his nose in her hair. She felt familiar in his arms, safe almost, as they stayed locked against each other.

"Ethan," Mikasa pulled away and promptly began with his alias. Her smile blinded him- the pure relief and elation shining in her eyes, her expression revealing the strain of the last few years on her more than anything else. He thought she'd never looked more beautiful.

"Melanie." She stepped on her toes to press her mouth to his, smiling against him as she nipped at his lower lip.

She broke the kiss, resting her forehead against his. "I was worried you wouldn't come."

"I thought about it," he admitted, trailing his fingers through her hair. She'd cut it short, almost to her jaw, within the time he saw her last. "But I'm here now."

"Yeah," Mikasa kissed him again, quickly. "You are. Let's go get your luggage."

"Where's Louis?" Eren asked as he followed her through the airport. He'd expected to see Levi standing right behind her the entire time.

Mikasa stood before the luggage console, staring at the small window and waiting for the luggage to begin pouring out. "Keeping watch," Mikasa said, glancing back to him. "He'll meet us at the car." As the bags arrived, Eren stepped forward, leaning over to collect his before it could pass. She tugged him up by his scarf, unraveling it from his neck before wrapping it around her own with a playful smile, the bright red a stark contrast to her fair skin. "It's cold." Mikasa took his duffle from him, pulling it over her shoulders.

"It is," he agreed, taking her hand in his good one and linking their fingers. "You got a studio in your new place?" Eren asked as they approached the exit.

"Yes." Mikasa squeezed his hand, small smile still lighting her features. He could get used to seeing that.

"Good. You can show me your paintings."

"I can't wait." She paused, glancing away uncertainly. "I'm sorry about shooting you."

Eren shook his head, wrapping his arm around her and pressing a kiss to her temple. "Don't be," he breathed, trailing his lips along her hairline. "I know you had to do it. Plus, now you can be my nurse."

Mikasa grinned, leaning her head on his shoulder. "Louis's the one with medical training."

"Fuck." Mikasa laughed, pulling away to take his hand again as they merged with the crowd mulling outside of the door. The cool night air ruffled their clothes, wind howling around them as headlights flashed three quick times as Levi's way to tell them where he was. "Let's go home."


End file.
